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LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
8/19/19 9:06 A

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Day 10
I accept compliments with a "thank you" and give them with sincerity. Like Phyllis, I think it would be so sad to go through life never hearing a sincere compliment. I also think that I would have to be very sad or depressed to be unable to see and compliment positive things about the people in my life.

SparkPeople, my teams and spark friends are in my gratitude list nearly every day. I couldn't have made the effort I have to be healthy without Spark and I especially love this team!

Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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JUNEPA's Photo JUNEPA Posts: 14,410
8/17/19 8:27 A

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I am learning to get better about accepting compliments but my default reaction is perfectionist thinking about how I could be doing better instead of taking credit for the gains I have made and showing appreciation for the positivity and support from the person offering genuine compliments.

Sometimes I am cynically suspicious that a compliment is insincere flattery and is setting me up to be used. So it is easier to slough off compliments and remain self- centred about my goals and the evidence I see regarding their progress rather than taking the time to discern if the compliment is sincere and connecting and giving back.

The above is about IRL compliments. I have received a lot of positive energy from Sparker support and try to give back too. I enjoy my Spark network of friends and appreciate them.

Edited by: JUNEPA at: 8/17/2019 (11:56)
June -- Pacific Time Zone
Where you end up is more important than how fast or where you start out.
- Improved fitness and nutrition, energy and confidence are my rewards.
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
A PH (personal high) is the main goal, a PB is the sometime icing on the cake.
Never underestimate the inevitability of gradualness.
Sopra le nebbie delle valle e le vicende della vita sorge una promessa di luce e serenita.


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NOCALORIES's Photo NOCALORIES Posts: 20,762
8/17/19 12:49 A

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Appreciate Good Support This is what I love about Spark People and all the positive thoughts that are shared. It has brought my attention to seeing more good and appreciating it. I am working on seeing good in me and being grateful for it. Life is a daily challenge, but when kindness is present the day is filled with blessings.

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GOCALGAL's Photo GOCALGAL Posts: 5,176
8/16/19 7:30 P

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I have gotten much better at receiving and thanking people for compliments. I have been thinking a lot about what best supports me and my goals. There are so many things here on SP that have been invaluable.
Something else that has evolved over time is how I now appreciate and support myself by positive self-talk. I have gotten much better at this. I appreciate and support myself best by staying positive and never giving up despite countless slip ups and pauses along the way. emoticon

Maria ~ So. Cal. ~ Pacific Time Zone
Smile, hug, encourage others

"It's not the mountain we conquer,
But ourselves." unknown

Winning is Not Quitting

MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,607
8/16/19 3:41 P

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Day #10 Appreciate Good Support

My focus has been on giving compliments and I only give sincere ones. I don’t think most people are used to nice comments and isn’t it a shame if all we ever hear is criticism.

Days 1-10
1. I began this book by writing in my magic notebook before looking to see what I wrote before and it’s been very good to see how my focus sometimes is the same and sometimes not.
Keeps life interesting for sure.
2. I can now accept compliments easier and give them more freely.
3. I still give in to temptation sometimes and do need to focus on protecting my plan.

Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. “Never give up on the dream!”


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OHANAMAMA's Photo OHANAMAMA Posts: 28,099
8/16/19 11:04 A

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~ Ask a friend or family member to compliment you on anything from your weight loss to your hair or your clothes.
No, I never ask for compliments or set someone up with stupid questions I already know the answer to, LOL. Does this make my butt look fat? Of course it does, my butt is still fat! LOL!

~ Come up with a response that affirms the person who gave you the compliment. For example, you might say, "You really made my day by telling me that! Thank you so much."
I simply say "thank you" or "thank you, that was kind of you to say."

~ Record your favorite responses so you'll remember :)
just a "thank you" is good for me.

Day #10, wow! 10% of the way through and hanging in there!

~ Renee ~

Turn your magic on.


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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,654
8/16/19 8:34 A

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DAY #10 APPRECIATE GOOD SUPPORT

My take on this lesson today really isn't weight related.

Yes. I appreciate it when someone notices my weight loss efforts, but there are so many additional ways this can be applied in my life. For example:

1. A friend I really enjoy has made a noticeable effort lately to contact me and plan for us to get together for coffee & walks. This has meant a lot to me because I feel many of my relationships are one sided with me doing all the work/panning. I made sure to let her know how much I noticed and appreciated her efforts.

2. I really stood up to our Garden Club to support a garden dedicated to victims of crime. They finally agreed, but only if I would be in charge of taking care of the garden. I was so worried that the care of this garden would, indeed, be all left up to me, but every time I have put out a "call for help" for weeding, pruning, etc. from my fellow members, they have responded favorably. Today we are meeting to do some perennial dead-heading. I will make sure to let them know how grateful I am to them for helping me.

So, in my book, appreciating good support is a give & take situation.

BTW - I will always take all the compliments that I can get! emoticon

Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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THETROUT's Photo THETROUT Posts: 1,891
8/16/19 7:57 A

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Really helpful to read your responses. Thank you, team members, for your support here. I truly appreciate your compliments on my consistency and progress.

Gill, I didn't know that someone might not like being called skinny. I don't generally comment on people's weight at all, so I've not called anyone that. And yes, a compliment should be accepted and enjoyed, not a cue to launch into an explanation.

Janet in Georgia

Just using SP suggested calorie/protein/carb range

Perfection is not the Goal; Slow and Steady wins the race


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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,692
8/16/19 2:38 A

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Day 10,100 days Appreciate Good Support

I still appreciate Gill, for the daily emails and other support, it really makes a difference to many of us! Of course I too also REALLY appreciate the support of all my Spark friends here, thanks.

I remain comfortable accepting Compliments and always try to Thank a person for noticing enough to give me that Nice Comment. The same lady I commented about last round always says I am still looking Good and if I am still losing weight and I add 'just maintaining now, the really hard bit' but thanks for noticing.
I esp appreciate my dh saying he recognised and praised me keeping off the most of it!!!

Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
8/16/19 2:28 A

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I really appreciate the support I get - mostly from friends.

- not insisting that I eat biscuits or cakes
- offering me vegetarian and healthy foods when I eat with them
- knowing I don't eat dessert on weekday!

I am much better at accepting compliments; I still have a tendency to offer people information about where I got something! Last night someone said they loved my earrings - instead of just saying "Thank you!" I proceeded to tell her where I'd bought them! I really must stop doing that - if she wants to know where I got them, she can ask, THEN I can tell her.

I still tend to want to refute comments about being "skinny" - because I am not "skinny". But these days I'm more likely to say "Well, I'm not overweight, but I still have fat around my middle that I want to get rid of" ............... or, I just laugh!
emoticon

It's funny that people think it's all right to call someone "skinny" when they'd never think to call anyone "fatty". I don't think people realise how hurtful being called "skinny" is............... to me "skinny" is someone who is unhealthily thin - like ill, or anorexic.

Calling someone "skinny" is not a compliment in my book. Actually, the manager at work came in yesterday and called a woman who has lost 1.5 stone (was 16 stone, now 14.5 stone) "Slim" - saying "Hello, Slim!"

It was supposed to be encouraging - like a compliment I suppose - but it made me smart a bit, because it's commenting on her body size, and saying nothing about her.

Gosh - I didn't expect that little bit of a rant to come out!

Edited by: SWEETENUFGILL at: 8/16/2019 (02:32)
Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
5/11/19 7:44 P

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Day 10 Appreciate Good Support on Sparks
Healthy Living Skills from : tools, community and friends
Check out new articles: u.nu/d45n
~ Make Your Bedroom a Healthier Place u.nu/pr3u Water u.nu/odwc
~ 4-Step Breathing Practice Can Help Focus Your Mind u.nu/ckvs
~ The 60-Minute Workout is Dead u.nu/d45n Squats u.nu/z6cb
emoticon Pets are good support u.nu/r0-x

Edited by: AURA18 at: 5/11/2019 (20:02)
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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
2/18/19 4:36 A

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I love how you are sharing your 'homework' in your daily blogs - great work!

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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TOPS-TORTOISE's Photo TOPS-TORTOISE Posts: 397
2/17/19 11:04 P

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I don't have a problem with accepting compliments about my progress, it makes my day. I don't worry about where it's coming from, whether it's sincere or not, or if there is an ulterior motive. I just take it for what it's worth. I get a lot of support from my TOPS group, but outside of that I feel like I'm on my own. I wish I could get more support from my family members.

The difference between
a winner and a loser is
a 'hare'



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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
11/20/18 5:27 A

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emoticon

and having people like you participating and posting on these threads is a great source of encouragement and support for me too.

emoticon

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,692
11/19/18 5:59 A

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Day 10,100 days Appreciate Good Support

I too want to say Thank you to Gill, for the daily emails and other support. Of course I too REALLY appreciate the support of all my Spark friends here, thanks.

I am comfortable accepting Compliments and recently a lady asked if I was still losing weight and I said 'just maintaining now, the really hard bit' but thanks for noticing.
I esp appreciate my dh saying he recognised and praised me keeping off the most of it!!!


Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
11/17/18 7:29 P

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Appreciating good support..
Where would I be without it?

And compliments?? They are part of the support. Oh, it is so nice to hear that you look nice and I know that this is especially true after being ill for a year.

I have lost weight; people do notice!
I am regaining energy; people do notice!
I can drive again; and a shut-in friend was so grateful for my visit.

When it comes to compliments I accept them at face value. I don't wonder if they are sincere; I don't wonder if there is a hidden message, I don't assume that the other person is "just being nice". I've just decided to let the good feeling flow over me and say "Thank you!"


Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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PAULALALALA's Photo PAULALALALA Posts: 27,143
11/14/18 8:09 P

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emoticon You're right! A compliment can really make my day!

Paula -- Waco, TX area
CST zone

SP 4 Cornerstones
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2BDYNAMIC's Photo 2BDYNAMIC Posts: 60,167
11/14/18 7:47 P

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emoticon .... When someone pays me a compliment I don't argue or disagree LOL. Just smile and thank them! ( Then secretly I smile for the rest of the day to myself).

Leader "Slightly Off the Wall" #1 humor team
Leader-"Small Goals and Commitment team'
Author of "It Happened at Dawn"



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PAULALALALA's Photo PAULALALALA Posts: 27,143
11/14/18 7:40 P

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I got a compliment from the yoga teacher today after class...something along the lines of "Paula, you're looking so light and limber in your poses!". I thanked her sincerely and then told her how much I enjoy her class. Hers was my favorite kind of compliment! DH compliments me in his own style saying things such as I look like I'm about to dry up and blow away...but that's just his way and that's OK with me.

Gill in one of your posts today you mentioned someone commenting on the pretty color of an item of clothing - and then you responded with where you got it rather than saying thank you. I do that all the time! It made me think. emoticon emoticon

I've gotten caught in the endless round of giving a compliment and then the person argues with me that it's not true - they really don't deserve the compliment etc. and so I never play that little game with someone who compliments me.... emoticon Even if I don't believe it fully (or wonder at an ulterior motive), I always respond graciously.



Paula -- Waco, TX area
CST zone

SP 4 Cornerstones
www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,654
11/14/18 9:19 A

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Day #10 Appreciate Good Support - Take 2

I think good support is hard to find these days because it seems like it has become an "all about me" world. People are so busy and stressed out trying to take care of their own lives they don't have the time or energy to notice anything outside of their life's circle. So that is my "kind" rational. My "not so kind" is that I am surround by a bunch of people who just don't notice - not just me, but they don't seem to notice anything! Is this their personality or, again, is it because their own lives are so stressful? I frequently find myself asking DH "What on earth where you thinking?!" and his response frequently is "Nothing"!

This might tell you a bit about the kind of support I have in my life. No one seems to notice! This doesn't seem to have changed from my last post on this lesson. For today's assignment Linda tells us to ask a friend or family member to compliment us on something. IMHO, if I have to ask for it, it isn't worth it.

However, if and when I do get a compliment I will remember to gush my gratitude all over that person!







Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
3/28/18 9:53 A

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Appreciate good support emoticon
~ Thanks Gill for another round so we can work on healthy goals together.
I appreciate SP weight loss tools, health information and community.
~ Nutrition, fitness, emotional and spiritual support can be found here as needed.
emoticon Giving support to other SP is very rewarding.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Recap 1-10 "Setting up for Success," lessons are becoming routines. Healthy choices to move ONE step closer to my goals. I can correct slips before they snowball. Learning new skills rather quickly. Researching health & nutrition books & videos to develop my program.
I learned to repeat simple daily tasks and the rest will fall into place. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
Make a list of things that make you happy.
Make a list of things you do every day. Compare lists ~ Adjust accordingly.
emoticon Progress - resist unplanned food - "No thanks, I'm not hungry" to myself! I wait till evenings for 1-2 squares of frozen 100% cacao with berries (on my plan). Around town, I think about this treat at home to resist temptations. I don't need it every evening, I can drink water and save it for the next night. Stopped having treat early in the day, because I eat more than 2 squares emoticon emoticon

Edited by: AURA18 at: 5/11/2019 (20:06)
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CAROLYNINJOY1's Photo CAROLYNINJOY1 Posts: 12,173
3/20/18 5:00 P

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Day 10. Appreciate good support.

I say: I really appreciate your telling me. Thank you. Or I say hearing that is great, thanks. Or simply Thank you.

Works for me.

Joy is a Choice. Choose joy moment by moment.

When all else fails, persistence prevails.

Injoy:) Carolyn

(Arizona - Mountain Standard Time)

My personal story as a blog:
https://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_p
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MINDFUL-C's Photo MINDFUL-C SparkPoints: (193,475)
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3/16/18 7:37 P

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emoticon emoticon

C

Live in the moment

I follow the MyWW Blue Plan
Reached my WW goal on 1/26/2020 :)

Love the Mindful Dieting Team!
sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=71537


EST


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MTN_KITTEN's Photo MTN_KITTEN SparkPoints: (175,192)
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3/15/18 7:50 P

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I do greatly appreciate allllll the support provided by Sparkers.

emoticon

Cat

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain.


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GOCALGAL's Photo GOCALGAL Posts: 5,176
3/14/18 4:30 P

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I keep coming back because this is a Great team with a Great Leader with lots of support. emoticon Thanks Gill for the the daily email and all that you do!

I continue to learn and to try to put it into practice. I have gotten much better at receiving and thanking people for compliments thanks to Spangle and insights gained here.

Sending healing hugs your way Wanda. emoticon

Edited by: GOCALGAL at: 3/14/2018 (16:32)
Maria ~ So. Cal. ~ Pacific Time Zone
Smile, hug, encourage others

"It's not the mountain we conquer,
But ourselves." unknown

Winning is Not Quitting

LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
3/14/18 4:17 P

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Day 10, Appreciate Good Support

“It’s so nice to know that you’ll be here for me when I’m ready to work on this.” Oh Yes! That is a wonderful response. It is one I could have used several times if only my brain were a bit quicker.

I love a compliment and enjoy both giving and receiving them. You know....we can almost always think of something nice to say and the if the other person is looking discouraged or dispirited, it can mean so much. I don't believe is lavishly complimenting a new hairdo or outfit that you hate, but you can usually compliment color, or style, if they ask. Sometimes just telling someone how much you enjoy being with them, having the opportunity to chat, or whatever is the best compliment.

I also think that truly listening is perhaps the greatest compliment.

Exercise today, just the treadmill....I'm a bit down myself today, no reason except that the double vision continues. It is cold, very cold too so it is a homemade soup day - comfort food, a good book, a bit of Sparking and...the treadmill.

Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
3/14/18 3:35 P

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Oh, thanks everyone. I've said it before, but the Team is only as good as all the people who participate! It gives me great joy to be able to help you on your journey - I'm glad the emails are useful. I might not be able to do them every time we do 100 Days - but it's worth a try to see if they help people stay on-track. By supporting you, I am also supported - it's two-way!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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SKIRUNNER1's Photo SKIRUNNER1 Posts: 2,305
3/14/18 1:11 P

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As I read this lesson this morning, I suddenly started thinking about how I feel when I see someone and give them a compliment. When I haven’t seen someone for awhile and note a weight loss or an especially attractive item of clothing they have on, mention it positively and get back a self-deprecating remark, I want to say something like this to them: “Don’t you realize I was really saying two things to you, that I notice how good you look AND how happy I am to see you again? “. A non-gracious response tells me they are more interested in themselves than in seeing me.

Then I started thinking those people in our lives who are snide - we all have them. These are the people who say something which would sound positive if it weren’t for their tone. I’ve found that the response which makes me feel best about this situation is still a gracious thank you to them. They get confused and think I’m so dumb I don’t get it - wrong, I’m so smart that sincerely thanking them for their “compliment” tells them that if even if I’m feeling uncomfortable or uncertain about myself, it is MY business, not theirs!

Interaction is. So interesting. emoticon

I do love that Linda urges us to think about and practice and write down different responses we can use. And that the first part of the lesson emphasizes responding to folks who offer genuine support, the second part cautions against asking questions which set people up for awkward exchanges, and I love love love the little paragraph referring to people in our lives who “get impatient“ with our progress. The sentence she suggests is absolutely brilliant - “It’s so nice to know that you’ll be here for me when I’m ready to work on this.” This sentence also needs to be in everyone’s notebook!



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PAULALALALA's Photo PAULALALALA Posts: 27,143
3/14/18 9:56 A

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emoticon Sue! There is a true art to both giving AND accepting compliments! I do enjoy a compliment and always try to make the person who gave it to me feel good about doing so.

edited because I meant to add that I can relate to the same feelings when having to do those exercises where we are to mention all our good points. I struggle with that!

This was a good lesson, and so true about the different ways of learning to accept and appreciate a compliment. And...of course, I was gracious to the woman at the Y who kept going on and on, but felt her style of complimenting to be a bit intrusive by trying to pin me down on how much I'd lost, and making it a very loud public display. Learning from that, when I see someone who's obviously lost weight or working on it, I'll say something like "You are really looking strong and fit!" rather than ...."just how much have you lost? how much more do you want to lose?" If they volunteer that, fine, but otherwise none of my business.

I do appreciate the support from SP friends, and also the tools that I use every day. I love this team, and let me add my praise to all the rest for Gill, our awesome leader. emoticon Love the sparkmails every day and the links to Linda's blog. Truly motivating!

And now DH is waiting for me to make the morning smoothie we share.

Edited by: PAULALALALA at: 3/14/2018 (10:00)
Paula -- Waco, TX area
CST zone

SP 4 Cornerstones
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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,654
3/14/18 9:03 A

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Paula - I have to say that when I read your story about the incident when that gal commented about how much better you looked I actually cringed! I found myself thinking "Oh my, poor Paula, that must have felt terrible to have someone tell her how horrible she had looked before!" I loved your "turn around" play on the situation emoticon

Wanda - I thinking having lunch with you would be wonderful! I have a gf who I have lunch with about once a month. A 3 hour lunch! ! ! It seems that we never run out of things to talk about.

I don't think enough can be said about the importance of a good support system. A sincere support system. I deal with low self-esteem issues and I love compliments because they help me see that I am actually a good person. When I come across an assignment that asks me to list my weaknesses and my strengths I moan with dread. I am working of this issue and making progress, but the ability to list my strengths is very difficult and my list of weaknesses is usually a mile long! I was at a Women's Retreat offered through our church a few weeks ago and on the last day we reach received a "Goodie Bag" filled with notes of support from our families and friends regarding our faith journey. These notes were so kind, loving, positive, and said such nice things about me that my heart was overflowing with appreciation!

So you can give me all the compliments you want! ! !

I love this team and the bonds we have made. There is so much positive support here. I hope you all find me to be a good support person also.

emoticon



Edited by: FUNLOVEN at: 3/14/2018 (09:05)
Sue

Michigan - EST

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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,607
3/14/18 8:53 A

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Day #10 Appreciate Good Support
My main support is still this book and this team of great virtual friends. Thanks Gil!
I don’t need compliments but do need my friends and family even though our fun times usually include food!

Days 1-10
1. I began this time while on vacation, so I wasn’t focused at all.
2. I've realized I can revert to old habits very easily, which is why I keep working on myself.
3. I still give in to temptation too easily and overeat when I'm alone.



Edited by: MAWMAW101 at: 3/14/2018 (08:54)
Phyllis ~~
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20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. “Never give up on the dream!”


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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,692
3/14/18 8:44 A

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Day 10,100 days Appreciate Good Support

I too want to say emoticon to Gill. Of course I too REALLY appreciate the support of all my Spark friends here on this team, Thank you.

I am comfortable accepting Compliments. I esp appreciate my dh saying he recognised and praised me keeping off the most of it!!!


Edited by: DSJB9999 at: 3/14/2018 (08:44)
Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

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CD13384562 Posts: 7,356
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Gil I agree with the others, you are an awesome leader and I greatly appreciate your support.

I appreciate ALL of my SparkFriends and the support we give each other.

Tom, the love of my life, who supports anything I want to endeavor.

Onward & Downward!

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3/14/18 4:14 A

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Appreciate good support:

This team is filled with wonderful people that offer great support. Thank you Team!
Our awesome leader Gill also offers great support!
emoticon

My family, when I let them into my world offers great support.

I have gotten much better at receiving compliments. When that happens I think about this chapter. I used to always follow with a negative comment. Now (most of the time) I just say "Thank You". I still do not like the attention but I push past it and move on.

Sometimes I let my husband know when I am not doing well on my weight loss journey. It is difficult but I do it. He is always supportive.



C

Live in the moment

I follow the MyWW Blue Plan
Reached my WW goal on 1/26/2020 :)

Love the Mindful Dieting Team!
sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
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MTN_KITTEN's Photo MTN_KITTEN SparkPoints: (175,192)
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My hubby is the love of my life ... he is my number one supporter in everything.

He compliments me daily ... they are heart felt.

He helps me ensure that I have everything on hand at all times to eat clean and exercise!!

Cat

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain.


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AMYBELLES's Photo AMYBELLES Posts: 13,667
11/18/17 10:26 P

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What beautiful roses, Gill! You do deserve them! I appreciate your continual involvement with this board and all the insights and feedback you give us!

I am a work in progress when it comes to accepting compliments. I still want to say, "but I have more to go” when someone says it looks like I’ve lost weight and I look good. I will really work on this.

Besides my dh and ds, I don’t talk about my weight loss efforts to anyone else (in face-to face life.) I come here on SP, and receive all the motivation and encouragement I need!

**~Amy~**
Playful Polar Bears
January A&I BSG Challenge Team

~The Villages, Florida
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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
11/16/17 3:26 A

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So, you know I said I didn't need roses as a 10-day reward this time? Well this morning I chose roses for my status update on my Spark page .........how subtle are the workings of our brains!!!

Seems I did need a reward of roses after all!

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,692
11/16/17 2:22 A

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I am comfortable accepting Compliments. I esp appreciate my dh saying he recognised and praised me keeping off the most of it!!!

Of course I too REALLY appreciate the support of my Spark friends here, Thank you. emoticon emoticon emoticon



Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
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11/15/17 9:16 P

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I truly appreciate the support on this team.

Thank you Gill.

Thank you everyone.

emoticon

you don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
11/15/17 2:32 P

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Appreciate good support emoticon Thanks Gill for another round so we can work on healthy goals together. emoticon

Edited by: AURA18 at: 11/11/2018 (10:55)
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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
11/15/17 2:20 P

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What a beautiful compliment, Sue. I am glad you are liking the Report forum.
emoticon

It was courageous of you, Cheryl, to risk telling your husband - and what a wonderful response you got!
emoticon

Susan - you are so welcome! It was you who nurtured me the first time round - and I am deeply grateful for that. It has been wonderful to see love blossom in your life again after your hard & heartbreaking times.

For myself, I haven't felt the need for roses this time! But I am SO much more comfortable with compliments these days - giving & receiving!

Edited by: SWEETENUFGILL at: 11/15/2017 (14:28)
Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,654
11/15/17 1:23 P

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On Monday a member from our Garden Club came up to me and asked if I had lost weight right as I was putting a piece of cake in my mouth! I laughed and said "Yeah, right! I'm trying to lose weight as I eat this cake!" She said "Well, I know you have a Personal Trainer and I just wanted to let you know it shows and you are looking great".

I never have anyone give me a compliment. Guess I have a bunch of self-centered and/or unobservant people in my life. I will have to remember to tell her Thank You next month when I see her.

Day 10 Lesson:

Learn to say Thank You graciously when you get a compliment!

BTW, Thanks again Gill for bringing the Report Forum to my attention. I started my page yesterday and I think I am really going to like it for keeping track of my progress and the things I have learned.

Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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CGH-ARTYPANTS's Photo CGH-ARTYPANTS Posts: 1,307
11/15/17 12:39 P

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I am not going to ask for a compliment. If it is forced, it is not real. I would rather wait for one that someone wants to give on their own.
I think I have responded well to compliments in the past, but I am guilty of the one that replies "I have more weight to lose" when someone notices I have lost weight.
I will try to be more aware of compliments and strive to be gracious and positive in my responses. After years of yo-yo weight loss, I was back up again. So, when I started again 10 days ago, I didn't tell my husband. But yesterday, I decided to tell him that I had lost 2 pounds. He smiled, gave me a thumbs up, and told me he was glad I was going back to getting healthier. That made me happy and encouraged.

Cheri from Georgia
Direction - not Intention - determines Destination


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MASTERPIECE8's Photo MASTERPIECE8 Posts: 9,887
11/15/17 10:45 A

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My first thought was also the tremendous support I receive from SP/friends. It is genuine and it is on-going.

I too have support from family and friends, but here I receipt support from friends who are or who have experienced some of the same things I have experienced.

emoticon

Babs
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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,607
11/15/17 10:05 A

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Day #10 Appreciate Good Support
The online friends here are so very appreciated because they always understand the struggle of healthy eating and weight control.

This is still a very hard lesson for me in my daily life. The upcoming holidays will make it more important to remember.
I grew up in a home with basically only criticism and it has always been hard for me to receive compliments or criticism very well.
It is also generally hard for me to give compliments to others. Sometimes they seem fake by the answer given back. Which is why I need to say “thank you” when given compliments and leave it at that.
Perhaps the answer (for me) is to look for more places to compliment others!


Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. “Never give up on the dream!”


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GOCALGAL's Photo GOCALGAL Posts: 5,176
11/15/17 9:20 A

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I appreciate all the great support here. Wanda, you are always so positive and encouraging to everyone. I loved your summary! Sue, congratulations for your upcoming anniversaries and truly inspirational ability to overcome life's greatest challenges. So Many others here are so supportive also but time is limited.

It is so beneficial to my progress to continually immerse myself in SP, 100DWL, support groups, challenges and friends that will build up and reinforce my positive self talk. This is especially important when things in the past or current situations want to do the opposite. Positive self talk leads to the positive actions that drive success. Time for water aerobics class.
emoticon emoticon

Maria ~ So. Cal. ~ Pacific Time Zone
Smile, hug, encourage others

"It's not the mountain we conquer,
But ourselves." unknown

Winning is Not Quitting

LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
11/15/17 8:28 A

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Day 10 - Appreciate the support

Oh! How I appreciate the support of this team! I'm so grateful for Spark and my SparkFriends. Although my "real" friends try to be supportive, it is often hard for people to understand the changes I've made and that I'm trying to make. Here it is all about Support and Caring.

Hubs is a great support too. I work hard to deal with his health issues and because of that we have made changes together even though our issues are very different. i.e. he has never been a pound overweight.

SKIRUNNER - I love the idea of posting your "Things I've Learned" with your signature. I read them and have to say we have learned many of the same things. What a good way to remind yourself. I'm terrible with names so I'd love it if you would put your name there too.

Sue - what you have been through and seeing your ability to rebuild and adapt to the changes in your life is inspirational to me! Congratulations on having the courage to accept a new love in your life!

Gill - The rose emoticon was a great idea. Two small rewards for Day ten!

Exercise today - core exercises

Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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CD13384562 Posts: 7,356
11/15/17 6:36 A

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emoticon Spark Friends for your continued support. I will have a five year Sparkversary next month. In that five years I have strayed and returned multiple times, and always, my spark friends were there to welcome me back, and encourage me to keep on.

You were there for me during my caregiving days, and that painful transition into being a widow. You were there when I changed jobs, and left the job, and started another, and now left that to return to my career as a branch manager at a different bank 3 weeks ago.

Hopefully I have given you support and encouragement along the way as well.

emoticon Gil who so graciously took on leadership of this team when the painful first part of widowhood sent me running away to focus more privately on myself. You are a true gem and very much appreciated!

emoticon I am eternally greatful for Linda Spangle, the books are amazing and her caring and input in the team are even more special. She reached out to me when Gary passed and offered support along the way. We are all so blessed to have her in our lives!

emoticon Life is completely different now. My new love and I celebrated our second anniversary as a couple on Monday. He cooks on weekdays, I cook on the weekend and he is completely supportive of me in all ways.





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7/12/17 8:01 P

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I have always had great support from my husband, but I've found that it didn't "take" until I started supporting myself! I have my "What I've learned" linked to my signature so I can read it over and over!



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MINDFUL-C's Photo MINDFUL-C SparkPoints: (193,475)
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7/12/17 11:41 A

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I love the support I receive from this team! emoticon

C

Live in the moment

I follow the MyWW Blue Plan
Reached my WW goal on 1/26/2020 :)

Love the Mindful Dieting Team!
sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=71537


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
7/11/17 7:20 P

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Day 10 Appreciate Good Support emoticon Sparkpeople's weight loss tools, health information and supportive community. Nutrition, fitness, emotional and spiritual support can be found here as needed. Giving support to other SP is very rewarding. Healthy choices that get me one step closer to my goal emoticon emoticon It has been rewarding doing the 100 days repeatedly

Edited by: AURA18 at: 11/9/2018 (14:27)
Maribeth MN CT Black Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u hands u.nu/httpsunu7lag
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DI_NAMIC's Photo DI_NAMIC Posts: 4,314
7/10/17 4:47 P

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Loved my Mom but, boy, was she critical of my appearance. Hence I appreciate every bit of true praise I receive for my efforts.
Delighted to have made it through my first 10 Days!!

Diana UK GMT (EST + 5hrs)

Delighted to be a 'Determined Daisy'.
'Defeat is a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.'



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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
7/10/17 3:06 P

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So, Day 10 is the final day in the section on setting ourselves up for success. We've looked at how committed we are, how much effort we are willing to put into it, what we expect in the way of support from others, and how to stay on track when others might try to derail us!

This one is about appreciating good support. This isn't always about compliments, I don't think. I appreciate it when my friend doesn't offer me mid-morning snacks with our coffee, because she knows that I don't want to eat anything between meals on weekdays!

I am much more self-confident these days - I don't ask people if I look OK in things - I don't care as long as I feel good! I don't expect compliments, but when I do, I listen to what they are saying. Someone recently told me how well the colour of my shirt suited me - and I thought "I must remember that" - I thanked her and told her how much I loved that colour.

I don't have a boyfriend or husband, so I don't have those more intimate compliments - like 'you look beautiful' etc - I might have to start work on myself all over again if I did. I'm more likely to get a 'that's a nice pair of earrings' or something - in which case, I'll just say 'thank you!'

I did think I might reward myself with a rose for completing these first 10 days - in the end I had a coffee in a nice cafe instead. It still felt like a reward. I'll give myself a rose emoticon!
emoticon

Edited by: SWEETENUFGILL at: 7/10/2017 (15:07)
Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
7/10/17 2:56 P

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Day 10 - Appreciate Good Support, 1-10

I prefer to just say "Thank you" and let the conversation go forward but I do appreciate the support and make a point to pass it forward.

Compliments can be dicey..I once complimented a coworker on looking good and she said "you didn't say anything about my new outfit yesterday." I think I fumbled the one but I mumbled something about maybe not being very observant yesterday "but you do look nice today".
Ouch~~ That is a painful memory.

Just say Thank You....it is enough.

Day 10 Exercise: Everyday body exercise

Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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MASTERPIECE8's Photo MASTERPIECE8 Posts: 9,887
7/10/17 1:59 P

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I'm always excited if someone says 'you look like you lost weight' or 'you look great!' I smile and say 'thank you.' However, there was a time when I'd reply - well, I shouldn't have eaten 'xxx' or I'd look better if I lost 'xx' more pounds. Or 'Do you really think this color looks good on me?' Thank goodness I'm past that now.

Babs
SW Illinois - CST


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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,692
7/10/17 11:27 A

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I always thank people for compliments and try to make them an honest thanks.. I still love the compliment I got at my club and explained that 'Keeping weighing in and an eye on my weight' is why I am able to say at my target weight most of the time! emoticon

I always try to write down the compliments in my file too.

Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
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7/10/17 10:33 A

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I am getting better with positive compliments. I still do not enjoy the attention, but more often then not I say "Thank You" and leave it at that.

C

Live in the moment

I follow the MyWW Blue Plan
Reached my WW goal on 1/26/2020 :)

Love the Mindful Dieting Team!
sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=71537


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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,607
7/10/17 6:12 A

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Day # 10 Appreciate Good Support
I grew up in a home with basically only criticism and it has always been hard for me to take compliments or criticism very well. However at a recent event I was able to simply say "thank you" to compliments from relatives I haven't seen for a long time.

I am generally honest about my weight struggles on Spark, not so much in real life. My on-line friends understand the ups and downs and realize that it is a life change so it is ongoing.

In my real world I have learned that some people will always tell me they could never eat like I do! Meaning eating healthy nutritious food and very little "junk".
The truth is I worry about my cholesterol numbers, I feel better when I exercise and my tastes have changed! Now healthy food tastes very good to me. I also want a healthy BMI number which is getting closer.


Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. “Never give up on the dream!”


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TOPS2KOPSVILLE's Photo TOPS2KOPSVILLE Posts: 23,911
6/24/17 7:35 A

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tomorrow I am going to review 1-10 and work on them not sure if will take one or two days.

day 10 posted.

Leslie Knudson
MN Area Captain TOPS
ASK ME ABOUT IT
www.tops.org
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BLONDEE53's Photo BLONDEE53 Posts: 15,629
3/11/17 10:33 A

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I am reminded of a shopping trip many years ago (over 20 now) with my friend Cathy. She asked "does this dress make me look fat?.....I said Cathy...we ARE fat!" We had a good laugh. My clothes don't "make" me look fat....still. I do feel a bit better in some things than others but it's the body beneath my clothes I am concerned with.

In all things, I will acknowledge Christ, my Savior and strength of my life.
Brenda (Bren)


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TOPS2KOPSVILLE's Photo TOPS2KOPSVILLE Posts: 23,911
3/11/17 6:54 A

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Day 10: Appreciate good support
talk about your goals and your plans for achieving them. Take time to share some of the stories about your progress, Remind people that what they can see is only a small part of your plan. Then tell them about what they can't see-how you've curbed your emotional eating,
Learn to receive compliments
respond warmly to the person who pays you the compliment
Don't set them up
Avoid hooking people with awkward questions that they can't answer honestly. They know you'll probably get upset with their answers or you'll even accuse them of not telling the truth. If you feel insecure or you struggle with your self-esteem, focus on dealing with these issues instead of punishing your support team.
Let them know it's not their fault-they aren't responsible for the changes you're making in your life. Simply appreciate their concern by saying, "It's so nice to know that you'll be here for me when I'm ready to work on this.
I usually say thank you but I don't go into explanations. I will work on adding how it makes me feel to receive the compliment.
"Thanks, it means a lot to me that you noticed. I appreciate your support." I like this one.
It is so very nice to here compliments something I did not hear in the past. I will give out more too.
Great comment BOWDIDDLE - We CAN encourage ourselves - affirmations are the best kind of self-compliments........I AM strong; I AM worthy; I AM able.
Giving myself compliments by visuals or self talk or by giving myself positive feedback or positive reactions will do help me succeed where I want to be.
Thank you TOPS and all the friends and members I have come in contact with. they are my support
Thank you Dad for leading me in the right direction and MOM for going to support meetings with me whether it was WW, tops.
Thank you to all the acquaintances who gave me encouragements or compliments.

Leslie Knudson
MN Area Captain TOPS
ASK ME ABOUT IT
www.tops.org
Central time


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GOCALGAL's Photo GOCALGAL Posts: 5,176
3/10/17 8:23 P

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I really like this theme that many of you are pointing out.that we are our own best supporters. Outside influences can certainly help or hinder but when it comes right down to it, what we tell ourselves positive or negative is what drives our success or lack of it

It is so beneficial to my progress to continually immerse myself in SP, 100DWL, support groups challenges and friends that will build up and reinforce my positive self talk. This is especially important when things in the past or current situations want to do the opposite.

Thanks Wanda for pointing out Mary's (SLENDERMAMA) blog it is emoticon

Edited by: GOCALGAL at: 3/11/2017 (09:17)
Maria ~ So. Cal. ~ Pacific Time Zone
Smile, hug, encourage others

"It's not the mountain we conquer,
But ourselves." unknown

Winning is Not Quitting

GODS_SERENITY's Photo GODS_SERENITY Posts: 4,307
3/10/17 3:40 P

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Day 10, Appreciate good support

I always accept and appreciate compliments. My hubby usually says; I look good or your losing it! (weight loss)
I'm thankful for friends who give me support and compliments and encouragement.
I'm my best supporter and I give myself credit.

Debbie

2020 is my year to reach goal and STAY there. No going back. With God nothing is impossible.


I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:13


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LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
3/10/17 10:47 A

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Mary, (SLENDERMAMA1) - posted an awesome blog on her page on January 24th.
It spoke to me of something old fashioned - fortitude, and also of strength, determination, and grace.

Everyone has obstacles in life. I think her blog will speak to other members of this team too.

Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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SLENDERMAMA1's Photo SLENDERMAMA1 SparkPoints: (8,577)
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I enjoy receiving compliments and accept them graciously ...BUT... I have my own opinions on whether the person is just being "nice" .

I never answer the question "wow , you look like you've lost weight" with a straight answer. I always say " do you think so? Good if I had, I should check. Probably I look thinner because I'm wearing loose (or layered or both) clothing." I do this mainly to avoid the inspection that sometimes follows the "wow, you've lost weight comment" .. I know I've lost weight, I know exactly how much to the ounce !!

What I do miss is the non verbal "look in the eye" compliment. I think Those days are probably over for me......too bad! emoticon

you don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.


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3/10/17 10:20 A

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I don’t ask for compliments … but I do accept them with gratitude.

I think support is more than words of compliments.

My hubby is my ... everything. He is sooooo supportive and I thank him all the time.

Yesterday I wore a new blouse and slacks ... well, they aren't new exactly I went shopping in my closet.

Hubby and my kids complimented me several times through out the day about how great I looked.

Thank you, thank you!!!

Cat

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain.


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BLONDEE53's Photo BLONDEE53 Posts: 15,629
3/10/17 10:02 A

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I like your comments Deborah and Wanda....living alone and talking to myself (out loud) most of the time, the rare positive comments from others are received with a heartfelt "Thank you"........I have a few tenants here that are very positive and so sweet natured and we pass compliments back and forth!

There's a cute commercial with kids, waking with mussed hair etc. and it sings " I feel pretty...oh so pretty"! It's really cute and makes me smile. I "feel" pretty maybe once a quarter but I can encourage myself nonetheless.... I can "act pretty"!

I know I deserve better than I've been giving myself and I will work to change my attitudes and behaviors towards me. I deserve better than cold green beans from the can....just saying!

In all things, I will acknowledge Christ, my Savior and strength of my life.
Brenda (Bren)


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LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
3/10/17 9:02 A

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I can't actually ask for a compliment either, but I make a point of noticing them and saying "thank you". Just that....thank you. I also try to return a compliment to that person then or soon after. It may be about a different topic but I know others like compliments also.

Great comment BOWDIDDLE - We CAN encourage ourselves - affirmations are the best kind of self-compliments........I AM strong; I AM worthy; I AM able.


OOPS! Forgot to post my strength exercise for Day 10 - Planks and Step Ups

Edited by: LIVINTODAY at: 3/10/2017 (10:26)
Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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BOWDIDDLE's Photo BOWDIDDLE Posts: 1,898
3/10/17 7:41 A

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Day 10

I can't do this day the way the book suggests.....I don't get compliments from others very often, and I'm not going to ask for one...lol

However.....I will encourage myself.



"Being Challenged in life is inevitable, being defeated is optional"
~Roger Crawford~


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CD13384562 Posts: 7,356
3/10/17 7:24 A

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I am in the "same as last time" group.

Day 10- Appreciate Good Support

I am not going to ask someone to compliment me. I get a lot of compliments as it is so I don't think I need to fish for one.

I do appreciate all the great compliments I receive and I believe I've already learned all I can from this particular lesson.

I used to add "but I have a long way to go" to those weight loss recognition questions. I've now learned to say "Thanks, it means a lot to me that you noticed. I appreciate your support."


MINDFUL-C's Photo MINDFUL-C SparkPoints: (193,475)
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3/10/17 4:01 A

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When I am complimented...

I think I have gone backwards in this area. I am better with comments about my body shape, but when people compliment something I am wearing I start explaining and don’t just say thank you. I am doing the same when offered food.

Starting today I just say thank you and no thank you.

C

Live in the moment

I follow the MyWW Blue Plan
Reached my WW goal on 1/26/2020 :)

Love the Mindful Dieting Team!
sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=71537


EST


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
3/9/17 4:15 P

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Day 10 emoticon

Edited by: AURA18 at: 7/11/2017 (19:15)
Maribeth MN CT Black Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u hands u.nu/httpsunu7lag
bit.ly/BLC41
LIVINTODAY's Photo LIVINTODAY Posts: 9,354
10/20/16 9:49 P

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Wow! Great posts here! Pam, I know what you mean about not expecting compliments yet BUT I hope you and the people around you are complimenting you on your efforts. Maybe you don't have a great loss yet, but having people notice that you are trying is HUGE!
If you feel like that support isn't there right now then be your own cheerleader!

By the way, I think you are awesome! You always support your team members and you often have helpful advice. You never deliver advice in a hurtful way so now do those things for yourself. Right now your health may not be the best but you are trying! Be willing to accept compliments and affirmations from yourself; those from others will be coming along soon.

Sleeky, I used to have a terrible time responding to compliments until someone said, "just say thank you". Who knew it was so easy??

dj, You are certainly worthy! Repeat that again and again.....then get ready because the compliments will be coming....just say thank you.

Maribeth, love that you posted about gratitude for Sparkpeople. I think we all should be grateful to have this wonderful resource.

Sometimes I realize that someone in my life has tried to be supportive and I have simply said "Um hmmm" and gone on with whatever I was doing. How rude! I am much better now about taking a moment to really hear what they are saying and to thank them for their support. Not all "support" is helpful; but I can be grateful to the people who care enough to try to support me on this journey....even when they don't really understand.


Edited by: LIVINTODAY at: 10/20/2016 (21:50)
Wanda

Believe in Miracles.
Forgive Everyone.
Life is not fair, but it is good.

Eastern Standard Time




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VIBRANT4LIFE's Photo VIBRANT4LIFE Posts: 2,291
10/20/16 1:44 P

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Day 10 – Appreciate good support

I do have a tendency when hearing a compliment about my appearance or weight loss to think- thanks, but – I still have a long way to go, I’ve made some progress but not enough or numerous other similar thoughts. I find it especially hard to receive a compliment on days when I feel I have slacked off on reaching my goals even though the progress I have made shows.
Receiving compliments and “staying in the moment” is something I need to continue to work on.



Cheryl
Central Florida
EST
"The way get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” -Walt Disney
"What you allow is what will continue." Unknown
"The secret of getting ahead is getting started." Mark Twain


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JUSTME9898's Photo JUSTME9898 Posts: 3,426
10/19/16 11:32 P

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I think one of the greatest compliments anyone can give me is to listen to my ideas, concerns and hopes. So, thank you my Spark friends for the support and the compliment of seriously considering me as an important human being.
In my family I have found that Facebook has changed the way people treat each other, for the better. It is now common in my family to celebrate success. Compliments are far more common. I like it. I appreciate when they support me and notice my effort. I enjoy giving compliments. I like smiling.

goal is to be able to walk again
Linda
high desert, California


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
10/19/16 2:45 P

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Thanks for posting everyone! I'm rooting for you!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
Healthy choices that get me one step closer to my goal emoticon emoticon emoticon Day 10 Appreciate Good Support emoticon Sparkpeople's weight loss tools, health information and supportive community. Nutrition, fitness, emotional and spiritual support can be found here as needed. Giving support to other SP is very rewarding. Healthy choices that get me one step closer to my goal emoticon emoticon Tt has been rewarding doing the 100 days repeatedly

Edited by: AURA18 at: 11/9/2018 (14:28)
Maribeth MN CT Black Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u hands u.nu/httpsunu7lag
bit.ly/BLC41
DJBTOO's Photo DJBTOO Posts: 3,160
10/19/16 2:39 P

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I am still working on this. I was not criticized when growing up at home but I wasn't noticed or given compliments/praise either so to receive compliments from others used to be awkward for me. Since doing this lesson before it's been a learning process to start receiving compliments more graciously.

As I stated in my previous post I tended to have my own (strong) opinion and maybe did not believe the person or thought they were just being 'nice'. Now I look at it in a different light. 1) I have to admit my opinions are NOT always right - ha! so maybe THEY ARE and 2) my disbelief of others statements/compliments came from a "I don't deserve this" base attitude I wasn't even aware I was still carrying around so much.

But since I've been working on this (well, working on EVERYTHING - ha!) I now find I have a kinder/gentler attitude toward myself and have started changing what I say to myself (self-compliments vs. criticism) and am more accepting/believing of what others say as well.

I don't 'need' compliments - but that's not the point actually. I obviously 'need(ed)' to learn to feel worthy and graciously receive from others what they are willing to give!

dj ~ Big Island Hawaii
Whole-foods, Plant-based, No Sugar/Flour/Snacks, Moderate Exercise, Spiritually Focused/Supported - that's the plan!

"...casting all your cares on Him, for He cares about you." 1 Peter 5:7
"Know well what leads you forward and what holds you back, and choose the path that leads to Wisdom." ~ Buddha
"When diet is wrong medicine is of no use, when diet is correct medicine is of no need." ~Ayurvedic Proverb


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10/19/16 12:28 P

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Appreciate Support

I don’t ask for compliments … but I do accept them with gratitude.

I think support is more than words of compliments.

When you find fruit, veggies and salads at meals served by others … while they are eating pizza.
When others walk with you just to keep you company.
When you are given a water bottle with your name on them.
When you hear the words I am proud of you … just coz.

I have evolved through the years. Coming from an abusive, critical home … words of endearment and positivity where met with disbelieve on my part.

As I posted before:

I give compliments ... and mean what I say.

Why shouldn't it work the other way around ... when I received them????

I heard once that if you reject a compliment that you are calling the other person a liar. Ouch!!!


Cat

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain.


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TWEETYX2's Photo TWEETYX2 Posts: 2,071
10/19/16 9:01 A

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I haven't lost an appreciable amount of weight in a very long time and so I don't receive compliments in general. However, when I do (staying positive here) I will keep this in mind.

Again, it is important to realize that we are doing this for many different reasons and one of the intrinsic benefits is how much better we will feel about ourselves. I think enjoying those moments of self-accomplishment and savoring them is a compliment in itself.

The best words are the simplest: "Thank you."





TweetyX2 (Pam B.)
Time Zone: EST
Atlanta, Georgia [USA]

A Look Back: January 4, 2017: 265.4 lbs.
January 1st, 2018: 231.6 lbs.
Total Wt. Loss in 2017: 33.8 lbs.

2018 Wt. Loss Goal: lose 52 lbs.
End of Year 2018 Wt. Loss Goal: 188.2 lbs.

This is not a race to the finish but a journey to the end.















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CD13384562 Posts: 7,356
10/19/16 7:18 A

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Day 10- Appreciate Good Support

I am not going to ask someone to compliment me. I get a lot of compliments as it is so I don't think I need to fish for one.

I do appreciate all the great compliments I receive and I believe I've already learned all I can from this particular lesson.

I used to add "but I have a long way to go" to those weight loss recognition questions. I've now learned to say "Thanks, it means a lot to me that you noticed. I appreciate your support."


TOPS2KOPSVILLE's Photo TOPS2KOPSVILLE Posts: 23,911
10/19/16 6:49 A

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Day 10,100 days Appreciate Good Support,1-10 recap

I am better this second time thru the book.

I do just say thank you
unless it is a fellow tops member as we both are on the same path just may be different approaches.
I live with son and he sleeps in and is on computer most of day but he has given me compliments from time to time. I give him a hug.
It is so very nice to here compliments something I did not hear in the past. I will give out more too.

Thank you TOPS and TOPS Friends and Family
Thank you 100 day team and its members
Thank you to my dad and his determination to get me to lose weight. and thanks to all the success stories who help me see my way to keep on the road to success.

Leslie Knudson
MN Area Captain TOPS
ASK ME ABOUT IT
www.tops.org
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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,607
10/19/16 6:42 A

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Day # 10 Appreciate Good Support
Because I grew up in a home with only criticism, it has always been hard for me to take compliments or criticism very well.

I am usually only open about my weight and food issues on Sparkpeople because somebody always has a positive thing to say even when I can't see it. My on-line friends understand the ups and downs and realize that it is a life change so it is ongoing.

In my real world I have learned that some people will always tell me they could never eat like I do! Meaning eating healthy nutritious food and very little "junk".

The truth is I worry about my cholesterol numbers, I feel better when I exercise and my tastes have changed! Now healthy food tastes very good to me. I also want a healthy BMI number!

I will try to enjoy any compliments coming my way and pay attention to any criticism for real lessons........there is always something new to learn.


Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. “Never give up on the dream!”


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MINDFUL-C's Photo MINDFUL-C SparkPoints: (193,475)
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10/19/16 4:22 A

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Day 10: Positive responses to compliments.

I have improved a lot in this area since the first time around.

I stumble on my words because I over think it (I try to go back to my old behavior in my head), but now I just say “Thank you!”

I am starting to enjoy the attention. Now that I have lost some weight I have stronger self-esteem. I know I should be happy and proud no matter what I weigh, but for me that was not the case.


C

Live in the moment

I follow the MyWW Blue Plan
Reached my WW goal on 1/26/2020 :)

Love the Mindful Dieting Team!
sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_indiv
idual.asp?gid=71537


EST


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,225
9/19/16 5:06 A

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Getting the outward response 'right' is a good start. It's a kind of 'fake it til you make it' thing. I also find I will say 'thank you' for a compliment, but internally judge myself more harshly - the next step is listening to what they say. I think the final stage is probably not caring what anyone else thinks or says! But, we're human/social animals and it's difficult to be so detached from the opinions of others.

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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SKIRUNNER1's Photo SKIRUNNER1 Posts: 2,305
9/18/16 5:41 P

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I have had trouble learning to accept compliments, let alone accepting them graciously. Actually thinking through and writing out compliments I'd like to get and responses is a good plan. I'm much better now outwardly these days, but sometimes the internal dialogue isn't as self-friendly. Not exactly good.



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