WOULD U RATHER BE ASTAY AT HOM MOM OR CAREER WOMAN

After working various jobs, from instructing at the university level to corporate marketing, I have to say my favorite job ever was staying home with my newborn. I got to stay home almost 6 months before returning to work and I loved every minute of it. That said, I do enjoy the adult interaction and the sense of freedom work gives me during the day. I have an opportunity to go back to staying at home at the end of the school year and I'm truly torn about what to do. There are pluses and minuses to both jobs. :) But I hate that I'm missing my baby growing up. :(

I would love to be a stay at home mom!!! And technically, we could do it. . . The only thing that stops me is my job. I love it and I would never find another position like this - I do/facilitate a Credit Recovery Program at the high school level. And that's my main reason for not going through with being a stay at home mom , but let's see what the next year or two brings. LOL!!!

I'm lucky enough to have the best of both worlds! I get to work from home when it's convenient for me (nap time and after James goes to bed). It's not a 'career' by any means, but I do get the satisfaction of knowing that I'm helping to bring home some money, and I get to spend time with my little man!

I have been a stay at home mommy for the last 9 years since my first was born. I can safely say that I do not miss going to work every day at all. There is nothing that I ever did working that has been more rewarding or fulfilling as getting to be there to take care of my kids and getting to see and be apart of everything that they do.

I went from a career mommy, working 50-60 hours a week 45 minutes from home to a SAHM. I wouldnt go back to the corpprate grind for anything! Maybe because I am spoiled now and I can still get out and work on the ranch with my husband, so I still get that independent time away from my kiddos but I would still do everything in my power to not have to work outside of our house again. If I need to help out now, I go feed the cows and take the boys with me. Occasionally when I cant take them, then someone in town watches them. We dont have the income we had with my job (which was significantly more then my husbands now) but that was a decision we made. We traded a good income in a city we didnt like living in for a smaller income in a place we adore and are happy to raise out family.

I would much rather be a stay-home mom. My son is 3 months old and I hate leaving him. Granted my husband is able to be a stay home dad. I would trade in my 12hour shifts (I'm a military momma!) in a heartbeat! ... for those who can work just a handful hours with barely handful days cherish it that u get to be with your baby more.. I miss my little Gabriel everytime I have to go to work.

Hmm, this is a really interesting question. I work 3 days a week and I feel I've found the right balance between work and home life.

While I love my children and am completely devoted to them, I prefer the variety of having a little bit of both. I love the hugs, the kisses, and the laughter, but I dislike constantly putting meals together and cleaning up afterward.

If I HAD to chose between being a full-time working mom or a full-time SAHM, I would choose working. When I was on my maternity leaves, I found my patience wearing thin by the end of the day and the repetition of play, eat, clean, play, eat, clean a bit of a drudgery. I also missed the adult conversation. Getting away to my job keeps me refreshed and makes me a better mom.

Neat question, I like the conversation it's generating!

Edited by: ONE*BUSY*MOM at: 10/28/2010 (12:25)

Ideally I would like to work like 4-6 hours a day. That way I am getting a break from the kids but still getting to spend a lot of time with them.

I am a child care provider. For many years I worked as a lead teacher and then a site coordinator in a before and after school program for school aged kids.
I loved my job. Love love love!

I plan on going back when my daughter is in school. For now I am so thankful my husband works so hard so I can apply all I know to raising our own daughter and not just help other kids :) I love being a stay at home Mom!

this is a really goood question i would love to work...it would give me a break but if i did i would feel soo bad i dont want to miss out on my family life and work would prolly only bring more stress on me right now anyways!! i am a fully time mommy right now i had my first one 2009 and i have 4 other kids which are my step kids love them to death

I can definately say that I LOVE being a stay at home mom. We have had to watch our money in order for me to be able to do it but it has been totally worth it. I dread the day I have to go back to work, however, I can also say that I miss having an adult conversation with people on a regular basis besides my husband. I miss my career on occasion but nothing compares to the time I have gotten to spend with my boys.

There are many days when I do wish I could be a stay at home mom but we definitely cannot afford that lifestyle. However, on the same token I find after a day at work I return home refreshed and ready to focus on taking care of my son.

I WISH I COULD BE A SAHM! Unfortunately, we need my income as well.

I am a sahm with a 2 1/2 and 1 year old. I really missed my job the first year. I then realized my identity was tied up with the prestige of my job. It is actually freeing to lose the title and be comfortable just being me.

I am a sahm with a 2 1/2 and 1 year old. I really missed my job the first year. I then realized my identity was tied up with the prestige of my job. It is actually freeing to lose the title and be comfortable just being me.

I think I would rather be a career woman. Like some women on here who always knew they would be stay at home moms when they grew up, I knew I would be a career woman. I actually had a Working Girl Barbie doll and read the New York Times and Wall Street Journal in the 6th grade. I never thought I would have children. But I LOOOOVVVVEEE my little guy to pieces. I just think I am a better mommy when I am not around him all the time. The Working Girl Barbie in me would be miserable without a career.

Now, if I could find something to do from home, like grant writing or running a non-profit, that would be awesome....

lol you are funny, yeah im for daycares as long as its the rite daycare, my hubby is against it but uh what i say goeslol! because oneday i will be working and the imaginary friends cant watch them. Some people are blessed to have family to watch their children witch is awesome. If i had family, who were able to do that id definitely opt for that, but literally everyonr in my family is working, or their time is occupied.
Right now making the best of my situation and i guess ican say im actually enjoying this whole stah thing. Starting school in a month and just so excited bcuz the carreer woman is on her way . Fitjeans the personal trainer.

How about "mom with a career?" That's how I describe myself. I have a career that is rewarding and that I love. I get to help people, so that makes me feel good (also, makes me feel tired.)

I love my family more than life. The only problem is that I am a total failure at staying at home...some of us just aren't cut out for that. I am a better mom when I get a little time away from the kids. I spend as much time as possible with them when I am home and a little separation makes me miss/appreciate them and that makes me a better mom.

I have nothing but respect for those who have the ability to SAH with their children. I do sorta want to smack people for looking down on daycare though because ours is wonderful! ; )

Hi, I use to be a stay at home mom. I just got a job again a year ago. I have 2 kids. I have a 2 year old and a 4 year old. My 4 year old is in preschool. I loved staying at home with my kids. There were so many things that I didnt get to miss out on, like my husband does when he's working. But the person in me needed to havea job. I don't send my kids to day care. My mother in law watches them and I have a pretty good work schedule. I have weekends off. My boss lets me off whenever I need to be. Working has changed me alot. I do get upset if I miss something big because I am at work. But for me and my family, the way my life was at home, it's better that I am working. it gets me out of the house, social interactions, gives me a little break. Makes my day better to when I come home and I see their smiling faces because they have missed me. So I personally think its all depends on who you are deep inside. If working works for you and your family, than its okay, but if you would rather be a stay at home, then its okay. There is no wrong choice here.

Hi everyone, i am still a stay at home mom but am starting school next month to become a personal trainer and i am really excited about that becuase i get to do something that makes me happy inside and out. Its my passion and i am going to pursue it and be a great mom too. expresses the way i fell. Right now being a sahm right now is not that bad but being a career woman is who i am and i want to the best at both and i belive in my self that i can do it, because the love and passion i have and my strong will. Thanks for the awesome comments you guys have really helped me out alot and also thanks for sharing your wonderful lives and stories its

I am so happy I get to be a stay at home mommy. I have three sons ages 15, 6, and 16months. I just can't see working to be able to pay somebody else to take care of my kids. I love that I get one on one time with my 16 month old and that I'm also there when my six year old gets off the bus.
I have a great hubby who lets me go and get me time at the gym everyday and I get to be social while there. I won't change it for the world!

I always thought that I would want to be a career woman until I became a mom and now I wish I could be a full time stay at home mom.

I work. My husband is military, sohe is gone a lot but I have a great career. I was threemonths from graduating with my bachelor's when I had Emma, and decided notto put off school, either. I want to be a great role model for my daughter, and I want her to be strong andbeautiful,and know that she shouldn't let anything keepher from her goals and dreams. I want her to always see that mommy strives to be her best in all areas of her life, and I want her to understand that to enjoy life,you have to work hard. Pride in yourself is a value I want her to have.

Plus,I figured she'd love me a lot more in the long run if she had baby food and diapers to wear :)

there are other areas of my lifethat are hitby thisthough;i spendsomuch time away from her with workthat I never ever take hertoa babysitter otherwise or really do anything that I can't bring her with me.Weekends andevenings I focus on her and try to do activities to enrich her life and give her new experiences, because I don't haveherall week to do these things. So Iget stresseda little more easily because I never get to "decompress" plus I stopped going to the gym in the mornings because that's an extra 2 hours a day we'reapart, so i'veresigned to workoutdvd's in the evening!but overall i'm extremely happy with my decision,and I think that every woman knows what is best for her, herchildren, and her family. You'll know what feels right and what isthe best situation...

I have been a SAHM for the past year. It has been a big change for me but also the most rewarding year of my life thus far. I have a 16 year old and I went back to work after 3 weeks when he was born. That was extremely hard for me but at the time, I needed to work. Me and my husband adopted two lovely siblings in the last year and a half. Once we completed the first adoption, Jasmine was almost 2 yrs old and Justin was born and we were on the road to adopting him at 3 months. It only made sense that I stay at home and bond with them. The cost of putting 2 small children in quality daycare costs more than my salary so the decision was made.
We needed that second income that we lost and since I had a passion for caring for children, I started my own business at home, Ms. Pam's home daycare. It is not only profitable but it is rewarding to care for little ones, it keeps me busy and I get to be with my babies all day and I am home when my teenager comes home after school and football practice.
I do miss working outside the home sometimes, I miss the adult interaction. I spend time in the evening catching up with former coworkers and friends on Facebook and occasionally I go out to lunch or dinner or for drinks to catch up and have some "me time".

Hubby and I had our first baby in February of this year and luckily we were both able to stay home for the first 8 weeks and then we both went back to work. I spent one more week off than he did and that one week about killed me. I love my daughter more than anything but I am not built to be a SAHM lol. I need the adult interaction and I need to be able to have "me" time...even if that is at work. I like working and I like my job so that def makes it easier.

Personally, I'd love to mesh the two into one happy little option lol. I'm planning to go to college for psychiatry. (Which will take FOREVER) I would absolutely LOVE to find something I can do while my children are asleep lol. I don't want to miss ANY time but I desperately want some me time. Wouldn't it be perfect if when the moment you became a mommy there were 10 secret hours that got added to your days so that you can go out, work and not miss anything?? Too bad we live in reality huh?
Summary, I'm torn. I really want a career, but I don't want to miss any family time, period.

I would much rather be a career mom. I love my children but I need to be someone other than just mom. I am currently in the same situation as you being unemployed and looking for a job. I love that I am able to be home with my toddler right now but I miss having adult interaction. I also need the mental stimulation that staying at home doesn't provide me with. I sleep better and feel emotionally better when I am working. I believe that I am a better mom when I am working because I am happier.

I first started this blog b cuz I was so torn between the 2 weather to be a stay at home mom or a career woman. So I thought it would be great to c what other moms go through and which one is better for them and how they make it work. It is a hard decision to make and you guys have gave me such great insight and your advice has really helped me out alot. Thank you!

So my ultimate goal is to be a career woman, but rite now since I am a stay at home mom. I am going to own it and make the best out of it. At first it was tough having to be at home with 2 kids 2 and 7 months, but I have gotten so use to it now. It is much easier and I am watching my kids grow up so much and am very happy to be their mom. So U guy are the

I would love to be a stay at home mom, but I can't afford it. If I could find a job that I could do from home, I would jump at the chance. I hate leaving Noah even for a couple hours. He is changing so much that I'm afraid that I will miss some of his firsts like crawling, talking or walking.

Before I had kids I never thought of being a stay at home mom. After my first was born I did go back to work (teaching), but after my 2nd it just didn't make sense financially. I would be working just to pay daycare. (I taught in TN and the pay was not so great.) I've been a SAHM for 4.5 yrs and we've added a third to the group and for the most part I love it. Their are rough days but at the end of the day I feel so blessed. I do miss teaching though and would love to go back to it once the kids are all in school.

What a great question! I was lucky enough to take off the full 12 weeks of FMLA with my son (he's my first child). I loved being at home with him, but I really missed my work (I'm a teacher). Plus, after awhile, I really needed the adult conversation.

I am in awe of anyone who can be a stay-at-home mom or dad. I love my son, and I love my work. I think there can be a balance between both.

I recently gave birth to my second baby I have 4 year old as well, and as much as I love my kids, for me going to the office for even a few hours helps me be a better mom. Being a SAHM has got to be one the most demanding things I ever encountered in my life. The first time I had both of my girls cry at the same time, I started crying myself. My house a mess, myself a mess with no makeup still wearing pjs at 1pm. For me I just need balance. I need to feel that I'm more than just the person who makes lunch, cleans house and wash bottles.

Before I had my first baby almost 4 years ago, I always said I could never be a SAHM. I loved the interaction of people I had being in the work force. Once I had my baby and started my maternity leave, I knew there was no way I could go back. I loved being a SAHM. I put in my notice & didn't go back. Now my 2nd child has just turned 1 and there are days I wish I could get a break. Most days I can't even use the bathroom without interruption. I just think that we always think it's greener on the other side, hoping that it really is. I know that I am in awe of the working moms because I don't know how they do it when I can't even get stuff done and I'm home all day!

I always said that I didn't want to be a SAHM, but then the opportunity presented itself......well God gave us the opportunity. My husband is in the Navy and at the time I was due to deliver we thought he was going to be in Japan so I moved back home to be close to family and friends until the baby could travel...well, there was a change in his orders and he is currently deployed from Everett, WA. The way our time line is now, it does not make sense for me to go to work. I would be able to work until March then move to WA then he deploys again in November and then we are being reassigned to another base, so I would have to stop working then to move. But, as much as I never thought I wanted to be a SAHM I am loving it. In this economy things are tighter financially, but we are blessed. Our baby is happy and healthy and we are thankful that one of us gets to see her grow and not miss any of it.

I'm both and it's not easy! My daughter is 8 months and I work from home and she stays at home with me. It's very challenging but I'm learning how to prioritize my time and take care of her, do my work, take care of myself, the home and meet my husband's needs. If anyone else is in a situation like this let me know of some tips!! Personally, I have to schedule my day and be very disciplined.. enter Spark People! Everyday I'm getting better and SP is really helping me.

Edited by: CALISSAU at: 8/7/2010 (22:42)

I was a stay at home mom for my first and only child until she turned 1 and i loved every second of it, unfortunately my body didn't. Thats when i pile on the pounds tippint the scales at 235. I was so wrapped up in being a mom that i let myself go and put everybodys needs before mines. Finally I started going back to work and let my significant other and family help more with my daughter. Then i started getting my body and health back together, Then i went back to school. Its like when i took that first step back into the career world. so much positivity followed and me and my daughter our still close as ever!!!

I always thought I would want to be a working mom, but after having my two kids, I would do ANYTHING to be able to stay home with them while they are still young. I hate seeing all this time pass by that we will never get back. Unfortunately, because of money and bills, We both have to work, so our kids go to daycare.

A SAHM for sure! I was a high-school English teacher for 2 years before I got pregnant. It was a very demanding, time consuming job that left little time for a home and family. We the decision to give up the second income so I could stay home and raise my daughter. I have never regretted it, even when things are so tight, we're not sure where the grocery money is coming from! God has always provided for our needs, and I am thankful to be living on faith at home with my daughter :-)

I have been a SAHM for 10 years and I homeschool my two oldest (10 & 8) and have two younger ones (2 and 6 months). I like being at home sometimes. Other times I feel like I'm drowning. I think if we had more money it would all be better for me. It is MISERABLE not having any money.
SO! My plan right now is go back to school (I have a B.S. in Psychology) and get a teaching degree for math and do it gradually. That way I can still stay home with the little ones a few more years. By the time I graduate, I can teach and have the same schedule that my kids have. I'll have summers off. It's the next best thing. I keep thinking about my kids going to college and I'll have no money to visit them with or buy things for them. And weddings! I have to be able to help out with that. I'm in "plan for the future" mindset.

I am a WAHM (Work At Home Mom) who would love to be a SAHM (meaning I'd love not to have to work for money!)

I'm a professional organizer and love my work, though. My son (13 months) goes to home child care three days a week so I can work. My company is Clear View Organizing. (www.clearvieworganizing.com)

Edited by: LUCYLOLLIPOP at: 8/2/2010 (21:25)

I would give anything to be a SAHM.

Don't get me wrong. I have a great job and love what I do but there is a part of me that longs to be the one who is there for my kids all the time. I picture doing so many different things and being able to keep a decent house and garden and give my family good meals. I picture myself teaching them and taking them to activities and play groups.

Alas, I am the primary breadwinner for my family and we have gotten into so much debt due to a failed business, we may even need to file for bankruptcy.

I had an interview not really sure if im going to get the job. If I get it that would be great. If I dont I get to be a stay at home mom. This blog has helped embrace being a stay at home mom even more. although I love making money and gettng a chance to let my hair down and be me, and not justbe known as mommy or wife.I feel like I a ma transitionin in this weight loss process. Going from mom to hot mom lol! Well what ever life has in store for me I am ready 4 it.

I myself was a stay at home mom working part time nights with my first daughter who will be 8 in Sept.
I loved it and I hated it. Part of me wanted to find fulfillment not only as being a mother but as a career minded woman. I did go to college for a reason so I wanted to utilize that part of me as well. While dh lost his job right befroe my daughter turned a year old I was forced to find employment. Not only did I get fulfilled by going to work adn using my brain and being around other adults, but I was able to spend more quality time with my daughter. I also work to show my children that you can be in the work force adn still manage a family. Having three kids is hard to juggle especially with a 7, a 2 and a 7 month old, but we manage. dad gets to stay home while I go to work and even if he won't admit it he is glad. He was never one for working full time and being responsible for the bills. He is a great dad and loves it. I am all for women wanting to be stay at home moms, I think that is a great job in and of itself or a stay at home dad. for me, it was the best decision for me to go back to work after having my last two.

My husband an I welcomed our son in September 2008. It was always a dream of mine to stay home with my children and spend as much time with them as possible. (we are going to try for another baby summer of 2012)
I stayed home for 12 weeks when my son was born. He had acid reflux, which made him scream about 12 hours out of the day. Yikes, that was stressful. My mom said something to me one night when I called her crying, reaching out for support. My husband wasn't home from work yet, and my son had been crying all day, I had not slept in days it seemed, money had been tight and the stress was really getting to me. She said something to me which at the time hurt my feelings. "Maybe you would be better off going back to work." It made me cry more and seem like I was a failure as a mother. Financially, I just couldn't stay home with my son. It was a hard realization to come to, but I had to do what was best for my family and go back to work.
Now, 22 months later...I realize that while I love my son with all of my heart, and enjoy spending my free time with him, I also enjoy having time to be a career woman. I enjoy working and I enjoy my job. It also makes me enjoy the time I spend with my family even more. We really like the daycare he goes to. I feel like he is developing socially and learning new things with his peers.
There is so much to think about when making the decision of starting a family. It is a personal decision whether you want to juggle a career and children and you should not let others opinions keep you from doing what is best for you. Ultimately what is best for you is what's best for your family as well.

SAHM definitely. DH and I are both active duty Air Force, so I'm getting out once my time owed is up...20 months! Lol. I am starting a photography business so I'll work "part time" but will be able to be home most of the time with Logan, just out on photo shoots every now and then. It'll be hard adjusting to the loss of income, but it will be sooooo worth it!

If there were even a chance I could do it, I would give anything to be a SAHM. Unfortunately, we are nowhere near where we would have to be for that to work out. I love my daughter more than anything, and I would love to be there with her from sun-up to sun-down. I told my hubby I don't want another child unless I can be home full-time. It's too hard for me to be away all day.

Unfortunately, I have to work but if I had to choose, I would absolutely be a SAHM. I was able to be one for my first daughter until she was 2 but I don't have that choice this time around.

Growing up when people would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would always say "I want to be a mom". I never really thought about anything else. Before I got married I loved the job I had, but I wouldn't change being a sahm for anything. I help bring in money by watching kids at home along with my kids, it gives my kids playmates and me extra money. Perfect.

As much as I would love to be a SAHM, I personally need time away from my kids. My 2 1/2 year old is too much like me (stubborn). But just the thought of maybe part time would be wonderful, but then we would never be able to make ends meet with the bills.

I work one day a week and am so grateful for that break. I love my kids but they are so demanding and everything is on their schedule- I get no break! Especially now they won't nap. So, I would rather work. Even as a nurse on a busy floor I manage to get a break and grown up conversation. But,no I don't think I want to work full time right now. I would worry about the kids so much while I was gone.

I would rather be a stay at home mom. Not only to take care of my son (and future kids) but I like the idea of being a homemaker. I love cleaning, organizing, planning, and cooking. I'm having a really hard time doing all that (they way I want it to look/be) while working full time. I love my job and I think I'm good at it, but I think I'd be a better homemaker.

I realize this makes me a bit of a freak, but as much as I love my son I don't think I could be a SAHM. I love my job. Not as much as I love my family of course, but I don't think I would do well just staying at home all day. I was only off work for three weeks when I had my baby before I went back part time. I did part time for another four weeks before going full time. My husband and I work opposite shifts, so the baby is never with strangers. I feel I get to do a job I love and get to spend quality time with my son. I feel I get the best of both worlds. Having said that, my husband totally wants to be a stay at home dad!

As much as I love my job and my profession, I would much rather stay home with my son. My heart is going to break when I have to go back to work in November.

Hello all!!

I am active duty military as well as my husband; it is the hardest thing we have ever done. You have to put your family second. We are separating from the military in less than a year and going to try and resume a normal life. I plan on working part time which is going to be easier and give us a healthier lifestyle.


Edited by: RACHELL34 at: 7/19/2010 (10:53)

It is hard living on one income.My husband has 2 incomes.There is never enough income to go around.There will always be something. I love being a stay at home mom but. I would like to have my own career as well. Who knows maybe one day I could have the best of both worlds

I'm a sahm and i love it!!! i love being with my daughter so much! Though i will admit with her teething and just being a toddler i've thought of part-time work so i can have a brake! lol. But really i've wanted to be a sahm since i can remember, I actually listed as what i wanted to be when i grew up when i was in 2nd grade!!! The teacher told me that wasnt a real job, guess she doesn't have kids huh?

I have always wanted to be a stay at home mom since before I was a teenager. Weird, I know. That didn't change as I got older. Now that I have Kaelyn, it still hasn't changed. I LOVE being home with Kaelyn! I did not like to work even though I was good at what I did.

Definitely stay at home mom!

I would have said career woman, but after having our first child in February 2010 and becoming a stay at home mom, I am so thankful that I get to be with our son for all of his firsts!

Hi I am a stay at home mom. My husband is very supportive and my 2 year old helps out with my newborn. But being a career woman is my passion it is so me. I love to work it makes me feel good. How about you which one would you rather be.