If you get a flat tire do you pop on the spare on or do you take a knife to your three good tires? Eating because other people's stress is stressing you out is actively taking a knife to a good tire. Food is not a stress coping mechanism, it is actively creating a second problem in addition to the first one. I mention this in this manner because I think that language can play a big role in helping or hindering us. I am stressed, so I eat and feel better can feel like a foregone conclusion, but it's really like living in Florida and planning to travel to St. Louis, Missouri. Spain should have no direct part in your travel itinerary unless you randomly insert it, which is what eating when stressed does. Food creates a second problem in addition to the first. The only time this is not true is if the problem is hunger, which food resolves.
Is there anything that you or your husband could do to make his work less stressful? Brainstorming ideas is more useful than snacking. Is there some sort of physical activity that could be used for stress relief (meditation, yoga, running, swimming, shooting, a group sport of some kind) that could be worked into the day? Same for the kids. Why are they cranky and what can you do about it? Chocolate will not resolve any of these problems. If some of these things can't be changed, start focusing on gratitude. Your husband might have a stressful job, but if it supports your family and allows you to do x, y and z, make note of that. If you find the returns are too low, focus on what you can do to get out of that situation and into a better one. So make a 5-10 year goal of your husband leaving his job. Year one might be exploring other employment opportunities with less of the stressful aspect, years two to three might be getting the appropriate certifications, classes or contacts and four to five might be entering in a new field or role. Adjust accordingly if it's a two month certification or a six year program. Delaying a little gratification now for a greater goal can make it easier because you are working towards something. Try for SMART goals whenever possible.
-google first. ask questions later.
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24,052 8/27/19 4:35 P
It seems sometimes like others' stress and moods are indeed contagious, like bad weather one is exposed to through no fault of their own.
The thing that works for me is to take these situations as a challenge to move above and be the best version of myself. My ideal me exudes love, kindness, joy and compassion. This includes treating myself the very best I know how. Overeating or choosing unhealthy food (fuel) is less than my best way to nurture myself. Meditation has been a wonderful resource to refocus and guide myself to a fresh attitude without eating my emotions. You do totally have my empathy as I know it takes strength and perseverance to overcome these less than ideal habits. www.insighttimer.com is a free app with thousands of meditations from 1 minute to extended times. My wish is peace for you without turning to food when you are not really needing it.
What are some strategies for overcoming emotional eating? I just started SparkPeople last week, but this week I have lost motivation. My husband is stressed about work, among other things, and he comes home cranky at everyone. This makes me want to eat. The kids are cranky, too, which makes me want to hide in my room and eat chocolate. What is the best way to deal with someone else's stress? Thank you!