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SURVIVOR61's Blogs

"Burning In My Bosom!"
Sunday, March 19, 2017      8 comments

"Burning In My Bosom!" A husband and wife celebrating their 50 year wedding anniversary while sitting at breakfast table. Wife asks husband, "Do you remember that 50 years ago today we were on our honeymoon?" Husband says, "Yes, I do.... Read more
Saturday, March 18, 2017      7 comments

"The Dirty Bird!" A guy named David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren’t expletives were, to say the least, rude. ... Read more
Today is a Day to Giggle... Happy St. Patty's!
Friday, March 17, 2017      6 comments

"Dr I'm So Sick!" A lady says: "Doctor, Im so sick! I feel dizzy, everything spins and my heart is burning." The man says "Ma'am... 1st, Im not a doctor, Im a bartender." 2nd you are not sick, you are drunk and 3rd... you're hear... Read more
Tuesday, March 14, 2017      8 comments

"And That's When The Fight Started!....." After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and... Read more
"Angry Dolls!"
Sunday, March 12, 2017      10 comments

"Angry Dolls!" A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her... Read more
"More Butter!...."
Friday, March 10, 2017      19 comments

"More Butter!...." A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY... Read more
"Just Me And Leroy!...."
Thursday, March 09, 2017      8 comments

"Just Me And Leroy!...." A guy stopped at a local gas station & after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man ... Read more
Little Boy & The Story of the King
Tuesday, March 07, 2017      4 comments

Little Boy & The Story of the King "5 Year Old Son, After Reading Story Of A King" Son: Mom, I also want 5 wives. One will cook, one will sing, one will bathe me. Mom: And one will put you to sleep. Son: No mom, i will still sleep wi... Read more
"Granny Turned 100"
Sunday, March 05, 2017      12 comments

"Granny Turned 100" The family wheeled Grandma out on the lawn, in her wheelchair, where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place. Grandma couldn't speak very well, but she would write notes when she needed to communicate. ... Read more
"In Service"
Saturday, March 04, 2017      9 comments

"In Service" One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names ...and small American flags were mounted on either side of it. The seven-y... Read more
"New Underwear! ........."
Wednesday, March 01, 2017      12 comments

"New Underwear! ........." The doctor said, 'Jeff, the good news is, I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pr... Read more
Three Dogs in a Bar
Tuesday, February 28, 2017      11 comments

Three Dogs in a Bar The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a Doberman and a Bulldog are in a bar having adrink when a great-looking female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me." So the Doberm... Read more
"Reporting My Neighbor Virgil!"
Saturday, February 25, 2017      10 comments

"Reporting My Neighbor Virgil!" ‘Hello, is this the Sheriff’s Office?’ ‘Yes. What can I do for you?’ ‘I’m calling to report ’bout my neighbor Virgil Smith…. He’s hiding’ marijuana inside his firewood! Don’t quite know how he gets it ins... Read more
"The Old Lion Hunt!"
Friday, February 24, 2017      8 comments

"The Old Lion Hunt!" One night, at the lodge of a hunting club, two new members were being introduced to other members and shown around. The man leading them around said, “See that old man asleep in the chair by the fire-place? He is o... Read more
Thursday, February 23, 2017      12 comments

"The Fire Truck!" A fireman is working on an engine outside the station when he sees a little girl riding down the street. She’s in a little red fire engine with ladders on the side and a garden hose coiled in the middle. She’s wearing ... Read more

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