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KITTYHAWK1949's Blogs

jokes day 340
Tuesday, February 02, 2021      13 comments

Why don't they take coffee breaks in this state? It takes too long to retrain them. What do they call 100 John Deeres circling a McDonald's in the farm community? Prom night. I am happy to report that putting one foot up under the ... Read more
jokes day 339
Monday, February 01, 2021      11 comments

The man walks into the hardware store to buy a chainsaw. He says, "I want one that will cut down about ten trees in an hour." So the clerk sells him one. The next day, the man comes in all upset and says, "Hey, this chainsaw only cut down on... Read more
jokes day 338
Sunday, January 31, 2021      10 comments

Did you hear about the man who went to the drive-in movie and hated it so much that he got rowdy and ripped up the seats. Did you hear about the coyote? He chewed off three legs and was still caught in the trap. New day, new week of... Read more
jokes day 337
Saturday, January 30, 2021      12 comments

Sven and Ole went fishing and the fish were biting pretty good, and while they were reeling in the fish, Sven he fell out of the boat. And Ole he got his fish in the boat and got the hook out and then he dove in for Sven, and he brought him up ... Read more
jokes day 336
Friday, January 29, 2021      9 comments

The county game warden dies, and Sven and Ole devise a plan that will hopefully land one of them in the position. They flip a coin, and Ole calls it. "You'd be callin' the mayor, Sven," he says. So Sven calls up the mayor and says, "Mayor, I... Read more
jokes day 335
Thursday, January 28, 2021      11 comments

Ole goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I got two problems. First, I seen dat Bob Dole on TV talkin' about how Vigoro can help your sex life dere. So I been dissolvin' a tablespoon of Vigoro in half a glass of water an' drinkin' it before bed e... Read more
jokes day 334
Wednesday, January 27, 2021      16 comments

Lena: I'd better warn you, my husband will be home in an hour. Henrik: But I haven't done anything I shouldn't do. Lena: I know, but if you're going to, you'd better hurry up. "Sven, you should be more careful about pulling down your... Read more
jokes day 333
Tuesday, January 26, 2021      10 comments

Sven and Ole go to the beach. After a couple hours, Sven says, "This ain't no fun. How come the girls ain't friendly to me?" Ole says, "Well, I tell you, Sven, maybe if you put a potato in your swim trunks that would help." So Sven does, b... Read more
jokes day 332
Monday, January 25, 2021      13 comments

Ole: Hello? Funeral home? Funeral home: Yes? Ole: My wife, Lena, died. Funeral home: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. We'll send someone right away to pick up the body. Where do you live? Ole: At the end of Eucalyptus Drive. Funeral... Read more
jokes day 331
Sunday, January 24, 2021      7 comments

So there was a big snowstorm and a snow emergency was declared. Ole had to park his car on the odd-numbered side of the street. Two days later, more snow, and he had to park it on the even-numbered side of the street. The next day, another sn... Read more
jokes day 330
Saturday, January 23, 2021      9 comments

Ole is hiking in the mountains of Norway, and he slips on a wet rock and falls over the edge of a 500-foot cliff. He falls twenty feet and grabs hold of a bush that's growing out of a rock. There he is, hanging, looking into this deep fjord do... Read more
jokes day 329
Friday, January 22, 2021      8 comments

Ole was fishing with Sven in a rented boat. They could not catch a thing. Ole said, "Let's go a bit furder downstream." So they did and they caught many monstrous fish. They had their limit, so they went home. On the way home, Sven said, "I... Read more
jokes day 328
Thursday, January 21, 2021      9 comments

Ole: Sven, how many Swedes does it take to grease a combine? Sven: I don't know, Ole. Ole: Only two if you run them through real slow. Sven: So, Ole--I see you got a sign up that says "Boat for Sale." But you don't own a boat. All... Read more
jokes day 327
Wednesday, January 20, 2021      9 comments

Sven and Ole are walking home from the tavern late at night, and they head down the railroad tracks. Sven says, "This is the longest flight of stairs I ever climbed in my life." And Ole says, "Yeah, it's not the stairs that bother me, it's the... Read more
jokes day 326
Tuesday, January 19, 2021      10 comments

Ole got a car phone and on his way home on the freeway, he calls up Lena and says, "Oh. Lena, I'm calling you from the freeway on my new car phone." And Lena says, "Be careful, Ole, because on the radio they say that some nut is driving the wro... Read more

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