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KITTYHAWK1949's Blogs

jokes day 145
Tuesday, July 21, 2020      4 comments

This guy walks into a pub, sits down, and says, "Give me two beers. Rough day at work." And the bartender says, "Oh? What do you do?" The guy says, "I take care of the corgis---you know, the dogs the royal family owns." The bartender says,... Read more
jokes day 144
Monday, July 20, 2020      10 comments

A guy comes in with a frog on his head, and the bartender says, "Where did you get that?" And the frog says, "It started out as a little bump on my butt." A brain goes into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a pint, please." The ... Read more
jokes day 143
Sunday, July 19, 2020      12 comments

A cowboy walks into the bar and asks for a whiskey. Suddenly another cowboy rushes in and yells, "Joe, Joe, hurry up, your house is on fire!" The cowboy runs to the door and then stops and thinks, "Hey! I ain't got no house!" The cowboy sit... Read more
jokes day 142
Saturday, July 18, 2020      11 comments

Into the bar comes a grasshopper. And the bartender says, "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!" And the grasshopper says, "Is that right? Why would anyone name a drink Bob?" A pork chop goes into a bar and orders a drink. The bart... Read more
jokes day 141
Friday, July 17, 2020      14 comments

Two guys were walking their dogs---one had a German shepherd and the other had a Chihuahua. The man with the shepherd suggested going into a bar for a drink. The other man says, "They're not going to let dogs into the bar." And the first guy ... Read more
jokes day 140
Thursday, July 16, 2020      11 comments

Two ropes go into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out of here. We don't serve ropes in here." The ropes go outside and one says to the other, "I have an idea." He ties himself up, messes up his hair, and goes back in. The bartender says, "... Read more
jokes day 139
Wednesday, July 15, 2020      11 comments

A Frenchman walks into a bar. He has a parrot on his shoulder, and the parrot is wearing a baseball cap. The bartender says, "Hey, that's neat---where did you get that?" And the parrot says, "France---they've got millions of them there." ... Read more
jokes day 138
Tuesday, July 14, 2020      8 comments

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender asks, "Olive or Twist?" A blind man walks into a bar, grabs his dog by its hind legs and swings him around in a circle. The bartender says, "Hey buddy, what are you doi... Read more
jokes day 137
Monday, July 13, 2020      10 comments

A pair of jumper cables walk into a bar and ask for a drink. The bartender said, "Okay, but I don't want you starting anything in here." So there was this dyslexic guy who walked into a bra. In the morning I'll do my official weigh-i... Read more
jokes day 136
Sunday, July 12, 2020      11 comments

An anteater walks into a bar and says that he'd like a drink. "Okay," says the bartender. "How about a beer?" "No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o," replies the anteater. "Then how about a gin and tonic?" "No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o." "A martini?" "No-o... Read more
jokes day 135
Saturday, July 11, 2020      10 comments

"Hey, bartender. Pour me a cold one." "Hey, go on, kid, you wanna get me in trouble?" "Maybe later. Right now I just wanna beer." A horse walks into a bar. And the bartender says, "Why the long face?" I was able to get Pebbles n... Read more
jokes day 134
Friday, July 10, 2020      7 comments

This skeleton walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer and give me a mop." This fly walks into a bar, walks up to a woman sitting at the bar, and says, "I like that stool you're sitting on." Just rested today as still a little tried ... Read more
jokes day 133
Thursday, July 09, 2020      13 comments

A man walks into a bar looking sad, and the bartender asked him, "What's the matter?" The man said, "My wife and I had a fight, and she told me she wasn't going to speak to me for a month. And the month is up today." Today I was going to ... Read more
jokes day 132
Wednesday, July 08, 2020      11 comments

A termite went into a bat and asked, "Is the bar tender here?" A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey! No mushrooms. Get out." The mushroom says, "Hey, what's the matter? I'm a fun guy." I need to do something. ... Read more
jokes day 131
Tuesday, July 07, 2020      6 comments

A man walks into a bar with a chunk of asphalt under his arm and says, "Beer please, and one for the road." So a five-dollar bill walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out-a here! We don't serve your type. This is a singles' bar." ... Read more

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