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ILOVEROSES
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ILOVEROSES's Blogs

A man Receives a compliment at a bar.
Friday, December 13, 2019      24 comments

A thirsty man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Suddenly he hears someone say: “Hey! Nice tie!” The man looks around to see who complimented him, but he couldn’t see anyone. “Hey! Nice shirt!” Again, the man looks around bu... Read more
Desperate for water.
Wednesday, December 11, 2019      23 comments

A fleeing Taliban terrorist, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the mirage, only to find a very frail little old Jewish man st... Read more
A man visited his doctor.
Tuesday, December 10, 2019      21 comments

One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said: “You had a great checkup. Is there anything that you’d like to talk about or ask me?” “Well,” he said. “I was thinking about getting a vasectomy.” “That’s a pr... Read more
A man ordered a meat pie.
Monday, December 09, 2019      20 comments

A man went into a cafe and ordered a meat pie. “Shall I cut it for you?” asked the waiter. “Yes, please,” said the man. “How many pieces?” asked the waiter. “Four or six?” “Better make it four. I don’t think I can eat six!”... Read more
Two friends go on a fishing trip.
Sunday, December 08, 2019      24 comments

Two friends go on a fishing trip. They rent all of the equipment – the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car and even a cabin in the woods – and spend an absolute fortune. The first day they go fishing, but they don’t cat... Read more
An old man starts having trouble hearing.
Saturday, December 07, 2019      27 comments

An old man starts having trouble hearing and goes to the doctor. He says: “Doc, I’m having problems hearing!” The doctor says: “Let’s check this out.” He looks into the man’s ear with his flash light and says: “There’s a foreign object in... Read more
Two hunters got a pilot to fly them into the far north.
Friday, December 06, 2019      26 comments

Two hunters got a pilot to fly them into the far north for elk hunting. They were quite successful in their venture and bagged six big bucks. The pilot came back, as arranged, to pick them up. They started loading their gear into the plane... Read more
Two salesmen were going door to door.
Thursday, December 05, 2019      24 comments

Two salesmen were going door to door, and knocked on the door of a woman who was not happy to see them. She told them in no uncertain terms that she did not want to hear their offer and slammed the door in their faces. To her surprise, h... Read more
An old drunk stumbled across a baptism.
Wednesday, December 04, 2019      21 comments

An old drunk stumbles across a baptismal service on Sunday afternoon down by the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and stand next to the preacher. The minister notices the old drunk and says: “Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?” ... Read more
A man hired himself as a handyman.
Tuesday, December 03, 2019      22 comments

A young man wanting to earn some extra money decided to hire himself out as a handy man and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighbourhood. He went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for him to ... Read more
Dog's hearing.
Monday, December 02, 2019      25 comments

My wife, Andrea, found out that our dog, a Schnauzer, could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog’s ears. He cleaned both ears, and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then pr... Read more
A wife found her husband in bed with another woman.
Sunday, December 01, 2019      24 comments

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. In a fit of rage, she ended up pushing him off the balcony. The man survived but immediately took her to court. Brought be... Read more
Wisdom comes with age.
Saturday, November 30, 2019      23 comments

A retired man purchased a home near a high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace, then the new school year began. One afternoon early into the first semester, three loud young boys came down his street, beating mer... Read more
Little Johnny was reading the bible.
Tuesday, November 26, 2019      26 comments

Little Johnny opened the large old family bible and looked at the ancient pages with fascination as he turned them one by one. He was still in Genesis when something fell out of the bible. He picked it up and looked at it closely. It was a ... Read more
Farmers of the community had gotten together to discuss some important issues
Monday, November 25, 2019      21 comments

In a small town, farmers of the community had gotten together to discuss some important issues. About midway through the meeting, a wife of one of the farmers stood up and spoke her piece. When she was done, one of the old farmers stood ... Read more

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