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Dear Journal...

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

I had a sort of funny day..felt off, . my.. withdrawl of pepsi,not going great, I got a 6 pack of small cans of pepsi max and drank one in the morning and instant headache.. same thing happened last night.. I assume the aluminum leached into the liquid cos a specific part of my brain hurted each time. So never again. I dunno about giving up pepsi but I DO realise it takes up my water goal and makes me fail at 10 glasses. Today I drank 4 cups of water.. sigh.. its SO hard to refil my stupid little glass bottle, 6-8 times a day. #overit. comeon Amazon. .. Slowazon. ugh 8 weeks for delivery? (new water bottle stuff)

I've been taking it easy, on my aggressive weight loss stuff, I've got my period atm, not chastising myself at the scale emoticon
However, very very very slight weight loss like, 10 or 20 grams a day. (better than a gain) heh I did notice it had changes with it showing healthy hormone balance that I haven't seen in a long time.. So that literally means I have shed excess estrogen. yay

I went back over the Keto BootCamp facebook group, which I've avoided.. Logan posts a tip video every day.. and I was about.. 9 days behind lol, I watched all and took notes, (I learnt nothiig actually i've been coaching people for Keto diet before Logan even started). and I learnt.. I made an error (in trusting his judgement)... he had contradicted himself,
he said in his youtube video last week to follow the meal plan perfectly, so i did,
then in the video today to the group: dont eat if not hungry, eat if you are.
So that gives me the freedom to listen to my body again.
I've EVEN.. .broken the meal plan to make this lovely dish:



Here is my weight loss to date:

I dunno what to make of it just yet, Oh that second gain, is from going to David's house, hmm. I absolutely have to make a premealplan/frozens for that exact reason any time I hang out with him - i gain weight. I'm really dissapointed to not be at 10kgs down by now, I almost had it a week ago, and .. 5 days ago,
It's actually like, ticking me off? cos I DID have it, slipped back etc..

Since I started the keto cut... i've lost.... only 2 kilo and before I did it.. I lost... 4 kilos in half the time - that is the power of letting your body tell you when to eat, I believe.

So I wasn't hungry at dinner, or lunch, so had very little.
All good. I did watch and awesome video by Dr Saladino (a researcher of optimal health, promotes carnivore diet that includes organ meat to ensure full nutrional needs).. Discuss salt, potassium and insulin resistance effecting it.
It resulted in me upping both salt and potassium here on the tracker to 3500 ea
I guess um I'll weigh out a day allotment to get myself understanding how much to use.

If you're interested in optimal nutrition / auto immune cures (like me)
here's that link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?

David is doing AMAZING on that Carnivore diet... his acne was aggressive all ove rhis body.. i counted only four today.. FOUR! never in the years i've known him has it been that reduced, (slightly when he did keto for only 5 days lol)... once again prooving my theory, it's an allergic reaction.
Um, his strength has gone up, his body fat is WAY DOWN like noticably, and functionally, awesome.. Oh I wish i took a photo tonight, damn but yeh MASSIVE difference.. like.. his sizable pot belly that was bowing his back, is nearly gone. (in like 5 days!!!) And his mood is better, and confidence is better and
.. I designed him a awesome beginners workout today (6 exercises every other day)
And thought I could surprise him with an adjustable dumbbell set and stability ball, to get him set up at home ---- And then I thought...oh.. wouldnt that be.. offensive? to have ur partner set all that up for you like "you need to change"? It's not that - I just wanna help him enjoy his confidence .. plus he's pretty much on a massive protein diet, why waste it.

so i decided instead.. to make a cute little 2 week challenge, called the core four,
hehe and I made myself a different set also - He said he was super excited about it! (really why? lol)

So if he gets that done, that gives me enough time to get his program together.
Which If I include a carnivore +organ meat meal plan, should take me a bit of time. But the workout programme 1 is done.. I designed it around what would work best for his body and decided to go hard on shoulders and lats, so that would be amazing if he did that, we will Definetly need body before photos!

So regaring the four core: he asked what was his prize would be, (Which I fully support)
and i said.. I dunno? how about.. an at home prize each time u complete it? he said a coffee? i said sure
then later on but there's a secret prize if u finish the whole 2 weeks and he said I KNEW IT ! hehehe so he doesnt know about all of this (ssh!)

I plan to put the dumbell set, (comes in acase) and stab ball in a box, with bows, and get his workout plan stretch guide, visual guide, nutrition guide, motivational guide, and progress chart.. all together in a nice flip folder that he can just lay out and see how to do each exercise, and make it large font and like FUN to do... and then I can simply add on extra moves (or he can) I found jefit.com _very_ useful for this, (but for the workout programme i used a system that's designed for working out at home)

And because I am one of those ... kinda girls who gives her all to a guy, and forgets about herself ---- I wanna do the same for myself - if I feel like doing lifting.
I'll see how I go with the core four as you can see I'm doing the dumbbell barbell work, (on the right side) of the image. and he's not lol.

I designed my set around beingable to play with my Daughter, which .. was an AMAZING FIRST TIME EVER... playing in a car park yesterday!!.. no .. equipment to play with just each other so i was throwing her over my shoulder, piggy backs..twirling her around.. balancing on the ledge... it was so fun!! What a difference and ALMOST 10kg loss makes LOL

I told my hubby that his cardio can also include 15 mins soccer with our girl.. (Ihave a large front yard) and... im not TOO far away from being able to do that too?
I remember in November.. .. depressively sitting and watching.... wishing i could join in
I told David tonight that... who I was in the carpark is my true personality. in terms of physicality,

IT's wonderful to.... have this.... ability?
And I owe it to spark people! This website inspired me to move the cross trainer into my lounge...EVEN THO i knew keto weight loss is best left with no exercise --- My first work out I nearlly died just walking 5 mins on it.. it took 1 minute at a time, the whole day. over the week i spontaneously added in 5 mins here and there, then 10 and now i can do 10 mins SPRINTING on and off 30sec ea.
And that, built some muscles yay!

in summary.
I'm using the Ketocut meal plan still. (1500 cal, classic keto macros, but high protein)
I'll be going back to... body cues for meal timing,
I have kept my word about cutting intermidnt fasting, right now my meals are like: 7am... 3pm.... 10pm - I've noticed in the past this has worked perfectly for my body.. butttt.. we're not really loosing weight atm? so.. I dunno i'll play around with it a bit more.

And it looks like I miss exercise so much, It's coming back in ! lol
Nawww.. cuties.
Mon - Wed - Fri the core four. and alternate days, Cardio or rest :)

*breaks the rule about writing and introduces a new topic in the summary*
my best friend on here is Barb and I reveealed something really vulnerable with her today.. my fears about.... bodyimage.. erm
When I was like 15 or whatever I had the build of Lara Croft the computer game.. pfft
and uh, it drove men crazy with desire/lust
I'm starting to notice.. more men react to me now.. and...... I dunno what to do. it's a literal fear, I've had many stalkers.... I hate .. the shallowness of lust ive no interested in it (its why i put the weight on) cos it's been such enormous pressure.

Any advice would be great? I know I'm not the only woman in the world to put on safety weight?
Any websites ? anything? hehehe

Plz Send Help! hehehe

Thanks for reading Family

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Thank you Barb...... hmm


    I guess.. second step.. is... forgive .. ? those that judged me, envied me, desired me?
    all have hurt me...

    But...... I don't need to be...afraid of. reactions (positive and negative),
    I am....

    Doing this for me - Cos I deserve... better health and life style.

    28 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/22/2020 4:28:21 PM
    First of all, KUDOS to you AND DH for doing this together. That's LOVE when you feed him foods good for him (and self-love to do the same for yourself). That's LOVE to design a work out and rewards (LOVE the surprise!) for DH. You've got the knack!

    Yes, we've talked lots about body image. You know, it's really good to identify what has gone on in the past and how you reacted (weight gain). That's a first step to healing. I haven't experienced your situation, but I am SURE there are others out there reading this who have and can give you better guidance than I. BUT I will just say, you're one step closer to a healthy lifestyle, because you can identify what has gone on that triggered the weight gain.

    HUGE smiles that you were able to play w/your DD. That's a win/win, for sure. MOTIVATION!

    HUGS and keep sharing your journey!

    28 days ago
    emoticon for sharing emoticon
    28 days ago
  • LOF7203
    Thanks for sharing
    28 days ago
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