I live in a freaken PINE FOREST
Tuesday, December 31, 2019
I really need to throw this is the trash!!! It makes me sad, unloved, unappreciated. So negative.
This was my one and only Christmas present. NOTHING from my husband Nothing from my kid. NOTHING but a cheap Pine scented candle that I am sure was an unwanted re-gifted teachers present. I live in a freaken Pine forest. 275+ acres and about half is freaken PINE TREES!!! To top It off I have severe allergies and asthma and sensory overload issues and am completely unable to tolerate strong smells.
Yes, I am being whiney and ungrateful. I am an adult and I know it is about giving and not receiving but really a freaken Pine scented candle.
The last month I have shopped, wrapped, decorated, cooked Christmas dinner for 11'people... did everything to make Christmas special for my family. I bought gifts for 14 different people. Nice gifts! I even took the time to hand make special gifts... One freaken Pine scented candle.... Yes my feelings are hurt. My self worth has taken a big hit. Clearly I don't mean that much to anyone.
To top this all off my husband was criticizing me because I didn't have an adequate enough gift for his mother. I got her some beautiful soft pajamas, a nice scarf, a puzzle and a few other things... He didn't think it was enough...he didn't get me a damn thing!!! Maybe his 85 year old mother can wipe his ass the next time he has an accident. My kid usually buys me a Christmas ornament...not this year... Nothing!
Today I am going to take down the Christmas tree. Put up my Christmas Village and hopefully just put everything behind me and start the New Year's off fresh.
I am important. I do matter. I just need to get the negative hurt feelings out so that I can move forward.