Amazing lunch with DH today - Chickpea burger on greens
I haven't lost much this month and that is okay. Truly it is OKAY.... Read on about why.
Probably this will sound really weird. After all I'm sitting at 200 pounds and my goal is to lose another 30 for 2019.
I'm really enjoying my body nowadays. I just like being IN this SKINSUIT. It isn't perfect by any means - isn't at my eventual goal weight, and there's some sag and bag, with all the defects a body has at age 55....
YET I'm REALLY ENJOYING IT!
First, it can MOVE. After carrying around 85 pounds for years, I can now jump and leap. I can run up the stairs. I can feel muscle. I see a waist.
Is it perfect? Nope.
But GOD IT FEELS GREAT!
I feel sexy - and making love is a new adventure again!
Second, I can wear clothes and feel SMART!
Is there room for improvement? Sure! And I'm looking forward to those improvements but for now I can wear clothes that makes me feel cute!
I don't feel like I have to wear a Wide Load sign on my backside.
I'm fitting L sized shirts for the most part. I can wear size 16 tight jeans and size 14 looser jeans. I can wear tights that show off shapely legs. I have a closet of clothes to pick from instead of clothes I used for hiding.
Third, I can DO STUFF!
I love my nature walks, my nature hikes. I don't have to worry about huffing and puffing. Being exhausted by the end of the day. Not being able to PARTICIPATE in the things I want to DO.
Is there more stuff I can't do? Sure! There are things on my wish list I still want to be achieve and that won't happen without losing more weight.
But for now I'm feeling great in this body. I love ALL that I've achieved.
I feel like I've been given a new life that better fits with the person I am inside. I'm living in a present doing the things I want to do and seeing a future where I can do even more.
Thoughts about the weight:
I've discovered that I can MAINTAIN right here if this is what I want. That takes about 1600-1700 calories.
If I want to have a gradual weight loss, I need to drop that to 1400-1500. This is do-able but right now I'm enjoying just eating again and not feeling FAT, nor being obsessed with every thing going down the hatch.
If I want a more rapid weight loss I have to drop this again to 1200-1400. And right now I just don't want to drop that low in calories. I enjoy food. I don't want to focus all the time on every 10 calories a bell pepper gives me.
Just got back from my check up. They couldn't do my cholesterol because I hadn't fasted oops! So we'll do that in October when I come back in 6 months. I really want to see a BIG improvement in those numbers.
Blood pressure was impressive.
Back in January 2018 it clocked in at 139/78 which put me in hypertensive zone.
Today it was 118/72.
Why is this important? Because I've always had good blood pressure - so had my mother. But as she aged, the numbers started climbing and the answer was medication. I want to avoid going down that same road.
Doctor was very surprised - he thought I'd have to suck it up because of my aging arteries - hahaha NOPE.
Weight came in at 200 even with clothes, shoes and having had breakfast. So though my digital scale at home shows a morning weigh of 201.8 I'm pretty sure I'm around 200 in some form or another.
Turns out that pain I was having in my right leg is bursitis so I ended up getting a shot for that.
And it looks like my spin splints might be related to my Vitamin D issue. So they took blood.
He still wants my gallbladder in a little jar but I told him give it a year and see if I have another attack. If I do - he can have it.
Doctor said I looked AHHHMMMMAAAAZZZZING!
Becky aka Labyrinth