Okay, so I just have to tell y'all a few updates because I feel like you're as vested in this as I am at this point. First, the pressure cooker--I hate to tell y'all this, but turns out, it's not magical. I thought it would instantly create these perfectly cooked, well-balanced, healthy meals. We are about 50/50 on that. Everything we've made has either been really good or really meh. I was hoping it would be foolproof. I think a giant contraption that looks like Rosie the Robot from The Jetsons should be completely foolproof, or at least Shelli-proof.
I included a picture this time. Note the apple for frame of reference. I wasn't kidding when I said it was the size of a hot tub.
Can you see the resemblance?
At any rate, we're using the gigantic thing and can cook enough ribs to feed a small fighting force. But there's a learning curve, people. Now about the Air Fryer... Randy spoke to two different customer service reps and followed their return directions to the letter. Yesterday he told me that he called back, just to check how things were going. Um... They lost his return and told him he sent it to the wrong place. At this point, Randy is just laughing. Let's just see what happens next, shall we? I can't wait to find out. The Saga Continues!
Last Saturday, I attempted to be a Good Wife. Randy is trying to eat Low Carb, High Protein stuff now. One of the hardest things he's learning to do is to eat breakfast. I will die if I don't have breakfast. Randy has to force himself to eat it. I found a low carb recipe for a sausage stuffed biscuit. It looked good and it was low carb. I bought this special almond flour and went to work on it. The dough was simple; it only had four ingredients: almond flour, eggs, cream and mozzarella cheese. SIMPLE. It probably is simple for people who are skilled in the kitchen. Alas, I am not and Rosie the Pressure Cooker was no help.
As instructed, I soften the cream cheese and melt the mozzarella, to mix with the eggs and flour. Then, as directed, I chill the dough in the fridge until stiff. I got this. Guess what happens to melted mozzarella cheese when you chill it in the fridge? It becomes a solid again. No problem, I'm sure I can form those into balls, as directed. I spritz my hands with olive oil so they won't stick to the chilled, chunky dough. I try to form balls, but it's hard when the chunks of mozzarella keep bursting out. Also, the stuff is sticking to my fingers. I love my husband, so I keep trying. I firmly press the sausage patty into the chunky ball. More mozzarella explosions. The recipe tells me to sprinkle some colby jack cheese on top of the sausage and then fold the dough gently over the whole thing. I grab some cheese, which promptly sticks to the dough that's already stuck to my hands. I try flinging the cheese onto the sausage. I try scraping the cheese off my fingers and onto the sausage. There is no gentle folding because now I have two kinds of cheeses bursting from the dough and my fingers. I manhandle the whole thing into a giant ball, encasing the sausage and try smashing it into the muffin tin. Of course it won't fit, so I just rest it atop the muffin tin and hope for the best. I wash my hands and try flouring them, to see if it's less sticky. No. I love my husband, but I'm really glad he's at a meeting and is missing some of the choice words I'm flinging along with the cheese. It takes me ALL morning and well into lunchtime to make these things. SIMPLE. By the time I take them out of the oven, they weigh approximately 5 pounds each. I honestly think I could throw one and smash the kitchen window. I'm tempted to try. I put them all in a tub and rent a forklift to carry them to the fridge.
I love my husband and can't imagine one of those sausage stuffed boulders sitting in the bottom of his stomach. I just know it'll take a week or more to digest. I can't do it to him. That sweet man has soldiered through so many catastrophic meals over the last 26 years and never complained. I can't do it to him. When he gets home, I tell him about the experience. He thinks I'm exaggerating until he lifts the tub out of the fridge and gives himself a hernia. He still tries to be nice about it, saying that he's sure they're just fine and he'll probably eat one for breakfast the next morning. He doesn't. Not the next day or the next. Neither one of us says a word about it. We just quietly pretend that the biscuits aren't in the fridge. I'm secretly hoping they don't cause the shelf to collapse. At the end of the week, I silently dump them into double-bagged, extra strength, Hefty, outdoor yard waste bags and drag them out to the dumpster. I sure hope I get better at this...
Good news though--Randy's numbers have already decreased significantly!!!! He's lost weight and his sugar numbers are in pre-diabetic range. This is all his own doing, as my attempts to help are more likely to harm. We have two educational appointments next week, so hopefully they have some Shelli-proof ideas for me. He keeps gently telling me that he's got this. Maybe I should just offer moral support and not try to feed him? lol
In other news, I closed a bunch of rings last week. Looky!
Some of this was learning choreography to Grease in my laundry room. I don't know why Broadway isn't knocking at my door.
Shelley and I made big strides on our book project last week.
Working on page layout. All the words!
And possible the most important news:
I was given a free charm with my last purchase of Crocs. I know Cookie Monster isn't exactly Sparky, but...
I hope you have a great weekend and that your kitchen is free from disasters. heh heh
Spark ON, Brave Sparkers!