Monday, February 13, 2017
I am so frustrated with myself! I need to lose this weight and I do good for a bit but then I sink back and find myself eating chocolate chips and I"ll eat almost a full bag. Ugh! I am so disgusted! I don't know why I do this. I keep thinking, "I want it. I'm going to eat it. I don't want to be told what to eat." But that is the wrong mindset. I know I"ll be going to the hospital soon to start one of their weight loss programs and they are rather intense. I need to change my mindset now if going on their weight loss program is going to work because I'll have to listen to what they say. Sometimes I just wish this stuff wasn't in the house and then I wouldn't be eating it. I'm sick to my stomach now. I'm so upset with myself. I'm trying not to beat myself up and just start anew tomorrow and really stick with it. If I beat myself up I'm only going to feel depressed and anxious. Not good. I don't want to eat more. It's so hard to break habits that have somehow become comforting.
Hopefully, I'll do better tomorrow.