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I lost a lot more than weight.

Sunday, August 21, 2016

I lost a lot more than weight in the last year. I lost something I'll never regain. I lost something that can't be measured with a scale or a tape measure. I lost my husband. To a battle only he knew. He took his own life January 30th, 2016.

It is a devastating feeling when you lose the love you had prayed GOD would bring to you for eight long years. When we met, I knew immediately he was THE ONE. He was amazing. He was more than I could have ever hoped or imagined in a mate. Unfortunately, he was placed on testosterone replacement therapy in November 2015 and within 6 weeks of starting it, he took his own life.

Dean had become my biggest fan. I had managed, with his encouragement, to become a triathlete. I was running approximately 25 races of varying lengths each year. Well, we were. We did everything together. The fact that he was also an Ironman only helped. He always cooked us very healthy, nutritious meals. My weight was stable for once in my life.

But after my husband died, I turned to that tried and true method of shoving our feelings down with food. And, Big Surprise, I proceeded to gain 25 of the 44 pounds I had lost. I am an emotional eater, to say the least.

But back in June, I started seeing posts on my FB feed about my friend Fae. She was dropping weight and transforming herself before my eyes. I prayed God would help me get my eating under control and I truly believe He led me to seek out Fae and ask her about the wellness program she was on.

She told me all about it and I jumped in with both feet. Thank God I did. Since the middle of July, I have dropped 17 pounds and I feel better than I have since my husband passed away. My mood is much more stable and my emotional eating is finally under control.

The fact that I have managed to lose those added pounds is so amazing to me. I am thrilled. I couldn't have done it without a little help from a friend. That's when I realized how much better I would probably do if I got back on SparkPeople. It's such a wonderful place to encourage others in their journey, as they gather alongside you and return the encouragement. So I am back. And I am hopeful that soon I will reach my goal weight.

Life without my love is hard enough without having to carry around 25 unwanted extra pounds and living in the fog of unhealthy eating habits. I am trying my best to look for the good in every day. Some days that is easier than others. But I know my Spark Friends will help.

I still have about 26 pounds to lose. And I am travelling to Italy in October with my daughter and her husband (She just graduated law school). I'd love to get a little closer to my goal weight by then.

I hope you'll join me on my journey and let's encourage one another to reach our goals.

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