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KATHIERAE
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Down in the dumps again

Friday, June 19, 2015

emoticon I had an awesome week last week. I set "home" and "work" goals for myself, and ticked off at least one item from each list each day. That was my MAIN goal, one thing per day from each list. I got a lot done!

emoticon Sunday was a very strange day. Church was at 11 instead of our usual 9am service, with a potluck after. It was nice sleeping in and still making it to church on time! And I love potlucks because we have some fabulous cooks around. There were LOTS of yummy salads. And I got to visit with folks I hadn't really talked with in a while, and I enjoyed that.

emoticon That afternoon we had nothing planned, and my youngest asked (again) if we could go to the local hotsprings to swim. I told him yes but that I wanted a nap first. I was just so tired!

I slept for THREE hours. emoticon

emoticon When I got up, hubby was cooking supper and I felt like it was time to make coffee and start a new day! Just so odd. Anyway, we ate supper and then I took two of my three kids swimming. We had a solid hour there before it closed. (We drive 20 minutes or so to get there.)

emoticon Anyway, I slept again that night even with the long nap! And I had goals all ready for the week again. But Monday came and I have just had no energy all week. I still manage to get a little something done each day but nothing at all like last week. Very frustrating. It's like the depression just settled in my brain and it won't let go.

emoticon Then yesterday I went to help my hubby at the farm, which I enjoyed. We moved our bulls from one pasture into the pasture with the cows. That always makes me nervous because they can get to fighting along the way. But yesterday they behaved well! We were done and back in town early.

emoticon And then I heard the news about my friends' loss. 15 year old boy killed in an auto accident. My heart just broke for the family!!! This boy did not have the easiest start to his life, and then his grandparents took him in and life turned around. This family has lost several members in the last few years and this particular loss is going to be SO so hard.

emoticon I just keep praying that the heaviness I feel about the situation is somehow lessening the pain for his grandma... like maybe I am carrying some of it for her. I am more than willing to do that!

emoticon But at the same time I know I need to do something about my own life again. One week of feeling well isn't enough. I want to feel like that every day!! And I do not at all understand what changed from Saturday's feeling fine to Sunday's feeling exhausted. I'm trying to be gentle with myself and do what seems right. I just wish what was right one day still was the next!

Maybe this Sunday I'll wake up feeling great again? emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • BLESSED2BEME
    Just getting it all out here helps...at least it does for me. If you are like me the depression roller coasters and it is really hard to go back up when the downs appear. I feel for you.

    I like HMBROWN1's idea - list 5 things you are grateful for and start the next part of your journey with a smile.

    Owning your feelings is so important though and that is what you are doing.
    1956 days ago
  • ARUNNINGKAT
    My heart breaks for the family of the boy lost! So, so tough.

    Sometimes it seems like a week of constant activity can catch up to you. Could also be thyroid or something like that. Might be worth checking into if it persists.

    emoticon
    1957 days ago
  • HMBROWN1
    Best wishes!
    1957 days ago
  • HMBROWN1
    I have days where I am down too. No reason. I try to make a list of 5 things that I am very grateful for. If that doesn't help I go and play with my dog. He is always happy and it rubs off on me. If it persists you might want to see your dr
    1957 days ago
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    1957 days ago
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