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Owning my story

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

It's been a while since I blogged as I don't seem to have much inspiration lately. However that is what makes Spark people invaluable! So many of my friends are filled with inspiration and I love reading their blogs and seeing the ups & downs that each one goes through.

When I think of what makes my story ~ it makes me a bit sad to realize that so very much of my life has been about trying to lose weight. On the other hand, at least I'm trying! And that is what I love about coming to this site. All of us are trying to work on our stories. It's interesting to see how some of my friends here are planning to get married - and they're working on getting the weight off before the big day... there are friends who are at their ideal weight and they share the journey of maintenance and the difference in their lives now...there are friends who are going through tremendous personal struggle - and yet they are still trying to take care of their bodies in spite of all the negative stuff going on around them... one friend gets stressed out at work and heads to the gym for intense training which turns his day around. All of us are working on the story of our life. I guess I'm just hoping that all of us are remembering to enjoy each day too. Not to only focus on tracking food, or making sure we get our steps in... but to truly enjoy living.

Which leads to the second part of the saying above - loving ourselves. I talk about that a lot b/c it took me a long time to get to the point where I could say that I loved myself. Most of my life has been spent in the negative atmosphere of self hate. Ugh. Why do we do that to ourselves? There's enough negativity surrounding us as it is. So today I'm not going to ramble on (imagine that!!)... I just want to remind any of you who read this, to love yourself. Don't let self loathing enter your story. You may not be the size you want to be - or be as active as you want to be... but that will come. For now, keep pushing on, but remember to have fun along the way. Yeah, put on some "Uptown Funk" and dance. Just dance.

Love you guys so very much! Have a wonderful week :)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Commendable for sure...........we need to love ourselves thru 'thick-n-thin'..... emoticon
    1949 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8054794
    emoticon I can't imagine you not thinking that you are great. I look at you and see such an outgoing extrovert person, eager, loving and absolutely beautiful! I wish I could be more like you.

    emoticon I love love love watching your VLOGs because you are sooooo interesting. I haven't done a VLOG because I'm such an introvert & feel like I would have nothing interesting to say.

    emoticon I'm going to work up my courage and do a VLOG within the next week. You really inspire me to put myself out there and be more open.

    emoticon Thank you for staying on here, and bearing with me along the way.
    emoticon I weighed in today as my 'new start' and I am up to 265.
    emoticon But I'm not going to be there for long. Changes are happening....today!
    1964 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8054794
    emoticon I'm still here too. It's just a little slow. Tomorrow I turn 49, so my 'new birth' of eating right & living healthy, WILL start the day after. NO MORE PUTTING IT OFF.

    I honestly want to do this. I do feel the desire & motivation to do it, grow a little every day, and I think the day after my birthday is just what need.

    1965 days ago
    I LOVE THAT SONG!!!! "... don't believe me ... just watch!!" I LOVE this post as well!!! Think on the good... FEEL the good (feeling it is important) and everything else will be fine!!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1973 days ago
    I've been thinking about this A LOT too lately. Every time I pick up my phone and check my spark teams, my facebook teams, a recipe, a this or that...oh my gosh! What am I doing?! This obsession may be clinical! I will feel slightly better if it results in some weight loss. Ugh.
    1975 days ago
    I totally agree - you ARE all kinds of awesome. Very positive and uplifting. Love your attitude.

    I'm sure all of us here have had wanting to lose weight take over their lives at some point. That's why we're here after all. Getting away from that is just as much a process as losing and maintaining. It takes determination but it also takes time.

    Keep up the good work!
    You're emoticon
    1975 days ago
  • GHK1962
    Sneaking in ....

    I read your blog just now - you know, the fact that you are still trying - THAT is a big win. That shows you love yourself enough that you want to be better every day. That shows you are still living. And that is good.

    You know what I find is also true? The people that often think they don't have much inspiration, or have something inspiring to say ... they are the ones that often inspire the most. And this is true of you. You are just all kinds of awesome ... and I think everyone would agree ... so keep on telling your story, its a damn good one.


    I edited because I had stoopid spelling errors! :-)
    1975 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/1/2015 2:04:20 AM
  • no profile photo CD4274730
    I love you :) YOU are an inspiration regardless of whether or not you feel inspired! You are a beautiful soul. Loved this blog, so spot on and just what I needed to read at this moment. Also, I love the background :)
    1975 days ago
    I think we ALL could use a reminder once in a while to love ourselves and to enjoy life. When I feel down on myself I remember friends I've lost far too young and it is the splash of cold water I need to wake myself up to the beauty that is my life. Thanks for the reminder :)
    1976 days ago
    :-) Lovely blog. I always think of you when we do 'Uptown Funk' at Zumba - I actually have the routine down pat now, and I think my maid of honour and I might do it at the wedding! Video to follow if we do!

    It's hard to imagine you not liking yourself. i know it's a personal thing, and we all struggle with our demons, but your life looks so lovely, and you seem like such a happy person. How interesting it would be if we could take the love that other people feel for us, and just really absorb that, I think we'd all be surprised, and maybe see ourselves as more worthy if we could see through their eyes.

    I'm glad you love yourself now though, it certainly makes the day nicer! We all think you are fab!

    1976 days ago
  • _BABE_
    Another spot on blog.... emoticon
    1977 days ago
    emoticon Lets quit dwelling on our failures and dwell only on our SUCCESSES!! No matter what they are! emoticon

    1978 days ago
    emoticon I don't even want to think about how much time I also spent focused on losing weight... seems like a full-time occupation that takes over one's life, Appreciate the reminders to enjoy life and give ourselves a little TLC! emoticon
    1979 days ago
    As I was reading your beautifully-written blog, I couldn't help but making a connection to your background picture. Look at his wonderful, colorful valley of tulips with the clouded sky above it. That's how life is. Always. There's always the chance of clouded weather, rain, hail, storms. But there will always be something beautiful to look at, too. Life will never stop testing us with hardships. The way we respond, though, and what we choose to look at and be grateful for, is our choice.
    I'm glad you have all those wonderful sparkfriends who inspire you. And I'm glad you're still here on sparkpeople to inspire us. Because the biggest and most powerful inspirations don't come from the people who succeed. They come from people who don't quit no matter how hard they struggle.
    1979 days ago
    What a great blog, Diane

    You are so right. We don't treat ourselves with the love and respect we show others.
    We need to stop being so hard on ourselves and learn to be kinder.

    Enjoy the rest of your week. You deserve it!!
    1979 days ago
    Three Cheers! Self loving is a privilege that many deny themselves. When did we become a species that is so self critical? Animals don't, in fact no other living things do! Perhaps it comes from living in the past or, living too much in the future. I believe when we stay more present and appreciate what's going on around us, we become more loving to ourselves.

    1979 days ago
    You're so right! I think it should be our goal "to truly enjoy living"! Life is a gift. Not every moment will be "fun." In fact, most of life is hard and, well, a lot of things are very tedious and boring. But we can will ourselves to have a good attitude. We can make a commitment to OPEN this gift we've been given, instead of leaving it all packaged up inside our excess weight. Like you, I have been very slow to love myself, but I think that I can truly say at age 58 (sorry to always mention my age, but it's an important reminder to me), I have stopped disliking myself and thinking about life only from the perspective of how much I weigh and how I don't fit the stereotype of what's considered beautiful in our society. I have stopped being obsessed with weight and started really enjoying each day (well, most days!).

    One thing's for sure--YOU are beautiful, Diane, and you are such a positive influence on me, making every day brighter just with your funny, loving presence! Thanks for being such a great friend!
    1979 days ago
  • HOLLYM48
    You are right that we must love ourselves every step along the journey, big or small because at the end of the journey, we should have enjoyed our life, not waited until we are a size ? to enjoy! Great reminder to love ourselves today!
    1979 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10895053
    Oh Becky, you are so rich and so wonderful to write such a beautiful blog. I've been heavy most of my life and I've hated myself because of it. With being thinner and then thicker and then thinner and so on, my husband, through it all, has loved me through and through. In fact, I was so blue last night with having put around 40# back on now and he told me how much he loved me with just the way I was, that I'll always be beautiful to him. Isn't he the best? And then he went on to tell me about those SP friends that tell me that I'm beautiful and so kind and loving and they know it too and it's so true! Isn't it really, the world that we live in, and how we've been brought up to think that we have to be skinny minnie to be happy?! I agree with you, that we need to live. And to be happy and keep on living life to the fullest! I want to believe that and will keep on living and be deep-down happy and I know that that will make the weight come off too. We're in this together, Girlfriend, and this Summer we can do this and we will! Loving you, Karen
    1979 days ago
    When are you going to post the video of YOU dancing to Uptown Funk??
    1979 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/27/2015 6:39:14 PM
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