Where I've been
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
Yet again, I am back. Newest update - I'm working as an OTA, bouncing between buildings as they use me to cover shortages in other facilities when my case load is low. That, added to the facts my pregnant daughter and granddaughter moved home last month, the new baby is due in about a week or so (because of complications in the pregnancy she's coming early,) and the parents are heading toward divorce, all ramp that stress level up, up, up!
What I learned 5 years ago when Dad-in-law got sick is that I am an emotional eater. I manage to keep it all together on the surface, and even convince myself I'm doing okay, but find myself reaching for the chocolates, or the coffee, or the chocolate chip cookies, or the caramel creams...
I did lose about 15 pounds last year. I've been fairly good at keeping that off, give or take 3 or 4 pounds - until this weekend, when we ate out almost every meal. This morning I am up 9 pounds from where I've been holding steady for 9 months. We went hiking to a waterfall on Sunday, and I struggled to catch my breath on the way back out. I need to refocus. I need to have safe munchie food available, knowing that I will be grabbing handfuls in times of stress, and I need to relearn ways to deal with stress that don't include exploding or imploding, or talking the ear off the doc when she asks if I have any new stressors in my life, lol.
I did start a journal, and I've returned to trying to do some Bible study in the mornings before work. Now I'm adding in the piece directed at food, and planning to start the 17 Day Diet again - probably a modified version, since I don't enjoy lemon water, lol. I've noticed I've developed a saying that I've used with others, and am now going to assure myself; "It is what it is - take it and move forward." Forward I go.