Who are you?
Friday, May 08, 2015
I am an introvert. Sometimes even the thought of social interaction takes more energy than I have. So last night after a gym induction so sexist I’m still struggling to contain my rage (that’s a-whole-nother blog), when I had to decide between going home and going late to a work do, it seemed fairly obvious which I would pick.
But I didn’t. I dragged up the dregs of my energy and went. First hurdle out of the way.
I walked into the room and came to the second hurdle. Here is my thought process during the second (probably less) it took me to scan the whole room:
Oh flip, I don’t know anyone. Just leave.
No, there’s my manager!
Oh flip, she’s sitting with the big bosses.
Just go over, look there’s an empty seat at the table.
That’d be SO awkward!
More awkward than walking into a room, letting everyone see you, and leaving again?
What if they don’t want me there? They don’t know me either.
Make them want you there. You got this.
I’m doing it. I won’t let it be awkward. I’m doing it.
And something magic happened. I did go and sit with the big bosses and not only was it not awkward, it was fun. I joined in the conversations and the joking. I made them laugh. They even tried to make me stay when I said I had to go.
I was grinning all the way home. In the best possible way, I don’t recognise myself.