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Spring Training, lies, denial and discipline

Monday, February 09, 2015

Today we kicked off our spring training program at work. Those participating got an insulated glass for all that water we will be drinking! We get points for exercise, eating freggies, drinking water and bonus points for trying some new form of exercise for 30 minutes - which gives me yet another reason to stay on my path!

I am hoping to get the max points each day (8 for water, 6 for freggies and 30 for exercise). This week my plan is to try snowshoeing - which will give me 30 bonus points - if I do it!

I had a great time with my grandkids Friday but dinner was awful - the Pizza Ranch - where my willpower went out the window. However, after we did mall walk and did four laps around the local mall. Now here's where it got a little tricky.

My daughter said - no going to the mall, no shopping, no buying them ANYTHING. Well, I figured mall walking was ok - after all we weren't going to shop.

We did stop in a couple of their favorite stores to look a bit on our last lap until we hit Bath and Body which all three wanted to go in and then of course they wanted a little hand sanitizer for their backpacks. They were 5 for $5 so I figured it would be ok if we just got one each - and an extra one for their mom and dad.

After we got home, one of the grandkids said "Now we are going to get in trouble, mom said no shopping" and are you ready? I said well, just hide the bag in your purse, mom will never know. To which she said "I didn't bring a purse", to which I quickly said, well tell them grandma was cleaning out her drawer and gave these to you.... AND THEN..... I heard myself. Oh my gosh, I am telling my grandkids to lie to their parents. Really! Back pedal, Barb. Then I had to say - no don't do that, I will talk to your mom.

Reality - I didn't want to make my daughter mad either (not that she would have gotten really mad, I just would have gotten that look, or the eye roll). No - it isn't that I didn't want to make my daughter mad, I didn't want to admit that I did exactly what she didn't want me to do. I didn't respect her wishes or her boundaries. UGH!

Which brings me full circle to this healthy living journey..... Sometimes I put myself in a position where I have a difficult time saying no, like the Pizza Ranch. Instead of focusing on what I really want, to be healthier, I focus on what I want right now. What will make me feel good right now - which robs me of what will REALLY make me feel good. I tell myself I will eat on track at the Pizza Ranch, which probably can be done, but when you don't eat salads, it is pretty difficult to find another healthy option there! Sound familiar? I don't respect my own wishes or boundaries!

Discipline. I need to develop some discipline. Not to say no to myself and to deny myself - but to take me to where I really want to be - which I must say is not the Pizza Ranch! It's all about breaking through the denial - not about denying myself.

The remainder of the weekend was filled with good eating, exercise and some time with friends. Yep, this had been a journey of enlightenment. The things I am learning that have nothing to do with calories and exercise!
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  • no profile photo CD13423552
    Sounds like a fun wellness challenge. Let me know how the snowshoeing works out!
    2322 days ago
    I have been guilty of similar things but working hard to be better - good for you!
    2322 days ago
    What great insights you have. It is hard to say No to ourselves. Focus on one thing at a time to change. You will get there.
    2322 days ago
    great insights here - terrific that you have the motivation from work, and snowshoeing is really fun, though it can be a lot of work (just ask our border collie, who walks on the back of DH's snowshoes while we are creating new trails!).

    making those good choices isn't easy, but the first step is realizing that they are ours to make - does something taste as good as ... fill in the blank? owning it is the first step along the way, you are on the right path!
    2322 days ago
    I'm impressed that you are "owning" it. There were several horrible years with my mother-in-law because she refused to respect our parental authority and constantly undermined us for what she wanted. It almost completely destroyed our relationship. It taught me a lot about respecting other people's wishes and defining what I truly wanted...what was important, and what was a whim.
    2323 days ago
    This blog is loaded with insights! Change does require change. Have you ever thought of probing your motivations using the Toyota 5 Whys (http://www.mindtools.com/pages/art
    icle/newTMC_5W.htm)? When you set or declare a limitation, question whether that limit is real or imagined.

    By the way, emoticon on making steady progress toward your goal!
    2323 days ago
    I have to say I was laughing with the part about telling the grandkids to lie. You're a really good person! I think some people would have just gone ahead with it.

    I think it's really cool that your job has a spring training program. What great incentive and support (and a little competition if you like that sort of thing).

    I really liked what you said about where you want to end up in life, and it's not Pizza Ranch. That was such a great way of saying it that resonated with me. Thanks for sharing!
    2323 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15145828

    Barb, I LOVED your blog! So many insights!! Fantastic.
    2323 days ago
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