A Southern Saying

I don't really consider myself Southern. I'm more of a TexMex person but I have picked up some sayings here and there that my real Southern Belle friends say. One of them is "Coming to Jesus Moment" or like Dr. Phil would say, "It's time to get real!" The Jesus Moment is from southern revivals where they start singing and you come up to the altar. I never realized it had a name till I heard a coworker use the phrase. I love using that phrase now. So, I'm having a "Coming to Jesus" moment with my pants!! It's time to get real!! I'm also really out of shape, too. I can't really keep up in Zumba anymore due to the extra weight and skipping classes. I've been easing back into things though. Doing some light dumbell work and crunches at home and allowing myself to catch my breath in Zumba or just leave if I feel like I'm going to upchuck. I'm also doing the stairs at work when I get a chance. That was an eye-opener! I was so out of breath from just doing a few flights!! I'm shocked at how bad off I am. To top it off, the OG bought me a one-piece bathing suit online that is a size 14, when maybe my butt is a 14 but my gut is about about a 16 and my chest is more like a 20!! Of course he thinks the ones with no underwire in them are just fine!
Has he heard of gravity?? These 52 year old boulders have gone through menopause now and should be considered an archeological site by now. LOL He learned the hard way that he can't buy me anything that buttons up front. It's just embarrasing. I wish he would stop trying to buy me clothes. Of course, we can never send any of it back. I make enough mistakes online shopping on my own, thank you very much. I don't need any help from him. Anyways, I'm taking small steps to come back to the fold and re-lose the weight.