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Friday, November 21, 2014

well it was time to face the music, that is for sure I have not stepped on the scale the whole month of November.. I knew that is would put me in a tail spin..... I was or has been or am still struggling.. not with food so much but with everything.. the stress has gotten to me and the stress is mostly from my chasing and chasing and trying to hold on to what little I have of motivation and willingness to lose weight and I just feel like my some line backer is bushing me.. there is a defense line that I cannot break through.. its line I am running down the field running as fast as I can and there is this wall that is hold out arms pushing me saying no no you can't cant come close.. get back..

I try every day to work my program as I say.. I know I was making some choices that where not good for me.. and to be honest it was not out and out binges. but it was pizza there pasta there. chips here cake there.. ok..yea but there was that wall saying hahahah you cheated you cannot get past go back.. and back I went..

So this past two weeks I had a huge plan.. the play book was written.. I knew what I needed to do and I was off running again. feeling good. feeling empowered feeling like Ok I am doing good ... then bam.. I had to step on that scale this morning just a quick side line curiosity got to me.. and reality stood up and slapped me back..
up 10lbs.. 10.. from the Summer 10 from all the stepping on the scales and seeing I was up 10 from the previous Fall..

So not only did I go all Summer long with out losing the 10 I gained from last Holiday.. I put on 10 more..

I have no words.. I don't know what to say or what to do for that fact.. I am not going to say how can this be? I know what happen but I just cannot believe that working my tail off for 11 months makes me gain in stead of lose.. I did not lose one pound this summer I was playing with the same up and down 3lbs and then finally it was all gain gain gain..

I sit here and cannot believe that I made said to my self last year this time that I was going to be at my goal weight.. ha..ha ha ha.. not only no there but so much further away..

Can someone help me??? can someone tell me what am I doing wrong..? I track my food all the time.. I am at 1300 calories all the time I know there where events of eating more or something that I should not of.. but it was not like a daily thing..
I eat clean breakfast lunch and dinner. no fast food no processed but yes I have had pizza pasta, chips and crackers but not in a binging way.. it would like if they where out because someone was munching on them I would dip in.. I don't know..but
I am at a lost again..

sorry this was so long and drawn out.. Have a good day!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I know how you were feeling. At times we seem to lose our way, but thankfully good habits kick in and we can get back on track.
    2205 days ago

    I'm way behind in reading blogs and am just catching up with yours. I've kind of caught much of your frustration on the discussion boards. I just want to hug you. You are so dedicated and committed.

    I once heard a nutritionist say that we should never eat less than 1,500 calories or we will send our body into starvation mode. I wonder if you are eating too few calories and your body is in starvation mode? I know you are pretty active. Maybe try increasing your calories slightly.

    Hang in there, Girlfriend. You can do this.
    2297 days ago
    Thank you for sharing your post!
    2324 days ago
    MsAnita, as usual, I'm in the same boat with you. I'm up 15 pounds!! Not a happy camper here' but what are we going to do about it? I know for me, I have NOT been as comitted to my health as I need to be.
    We need to be kicking each other's butts, that's what!
    2338 days ago
    MsAnita, as usual, I'm in the same boat with you. I'm up 15 pounds!! Not a happy camper here' but what are we going to do about it? I know for me, I have NOT been as comitted to my health as I need to be.
    We need to be kicking each other's butts, that's what!
    2338 days ago
    Learning to forgive yourself is a big thing that is hard to learn. Figuring out if calories burned is around calories taken in? Learning to calm yourself with deep breathing? Drinking half your weight in ounces a day.. which I think you do. Believe in yourself. It takes time. Unfortunately it goes on faster than it comes off. Biggest thing...don't give up. I believe in you and you can get there! emoticon
    2340 days ago
    I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I know how easy it is to slip back into old patterns with things like pizza, pasta, cake, etc. and, BAM, the next thing you know, you've got a gain. Not fun, but definitely reversible.

    My suggestion would be to go back to basics, as has been suggested here before. Back to measuring, counting, drinking water, and move, move, moving. And do it now before you have even more to undo. I speak as someone who's regained a tremendous amount of weight and is now paying the price for it.

    Don't give up. You CAN do this.

    2340 days ago
    All I can say is what's been suggested already . . . weigh/measure and track your food. Pasta here and pizza there is NOT going to cause a 10 lb. weight gain. UNLESS it's in larger than healthy portions.

    It takes a tremendous amt. of courage to admit you're not where you want to be. But it takes even MORE courage to make a plan, evaluate it, change up what may need changing, and move on.

    That's what it takes!

    2340 days ago
  • NHES220
    I think you need to get back to measuring and tracking. You may think you are staying in your range, but you may not be. Also, I know that I need to stay low carb. Even if I stay within my range, but I'm having chips and pasta, my weight will creep up. Also, are you exercising? Good luck!
    2340 days ago
  • DTHOR6
    One thing I have learned is that sometimes you need the pizza, pasta ect. You can't tell yourself that you can't have it or you will just binge the next time you see it if you know what I am trying to say. Shake things up a bit eat low on your goal a couple days then high. This is what I am learning to do and it seems to be working. I hit a plateau and that is what finally helped.

    I have taken NOTHING out of my diet. I eat pizza a couple times a month. I however do not eat nearly what I use to. All things in moderation. Most of all don't look at just the scale for your journey, do you measure? are you loosing inches? Maybe you are gaining muscle (that was a hard one for me to get my head around). The scale is just one tool in this journey. Don't get discouraged. You CAN do this!! I know you can.

    Big hugs,
    2340 days ago
  • BILL60
    It's pretty difficult to gain 10 lbs while "almost" sticking to the eating plan. You most likely steered away from the master plans on numerous occasions and the price you're paying is a 10lb gain. The question is.....was it worth it? Was the pizza, pasta in your quest for a healthy you, the master plan must be the most important endeavor in your life. It can't be 2nd or 3d or fourth. It must be "NUMERO 1". If it isn't, it just won't work. Good luck and I wish you success.
    2340 days ago
    I'm reading your blog and thinking . . . glad to know it's not just me.

    Thank you for sharing MY thoughts!!
    2340 days ago
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