Sunday, October 19, 2014
Even though I knew it was coming, I still didn't have any way of stopping myself from sliding back into my depression, so once again I ended upstaging in hospital, I got home last night. I don't really feel that being there has changed how I feel, or done anything to improve things. The last few times I have been admitted its just felt like a holding pen, I think the most positive thing it does is to give Nikki a rest from me, and it simply makes me stop. When I say stop, I mean stop maniacally trying to do everything at one. Which is what I do.
I am trying to slow down, not do so much all at once. But I feel sometimes things are moving so fast that I have to move quickly to just keep up. If I joined any groups at the beginning of this month I really do feel bad, because once again I crashed and didn't follow them up. Sorry. I also loused up my online Literature course.
BUT I am ready to pick myself up once again and start again. I know as long as I have that I will always be ok.