Because I gotta have faith..... (sing it!)
Thursday, July 24, 2014
Last weekend I saw a 7 on my scale - as in I was in the 170's for the first time in years. Woohoo! Granted it was barely in the 170's as in 179.6 - but it was in the next lower decade of numbers on the scale. Hmmm decade isn't the word I want - but I think you know what I mean.
Well, Monday it was back to 180. Tuesday it was 180.6 Yesterday it was 181.4. Today back to 180.6. Hmmmmm. What happened to that 7? What gives?
Go figure. Mr. Scale. I really don't like him. I feel he taunts me all the time. He can be a bit of a bully. I usually try to avoid him, but doing this 5% challenge, I have started weighing daily again.
I know the daily fluctuation is most likely water weight and not really weight loss. However, it messes with my head. Especially on days like today.
My knees hurt. They ache. They are swollen. I think I need to get in to the ortho doc and have some fluid pulled off them. It hurts to walk. I feel fatigued before I even start. I feel lazy. I don't wanna. Really, I don't. I just want to do nothing. However, I made up my mind to push through it ---- and then Mr. Scale flashes his stingy number and I want to say "Why bother".
OK - so why bother? Because I want to take some of this weight off my knees and give them a break. Because if I don't keep moving them, some day I won't be able to move them. Because I want to keep my mobility as long as possible. Because I want a healthier body. Because I feel better when I get outdoors for a walk. Because I am determined not to be defeated by a number on a silly little box. Because I am committed to a healthier me and sitting in my chair eating those tempting bagels and cookies is not going to bring me closer to that goal.
Why bother? Because Mr Scale and I play this game together. He tosses out a lower number, then it goes up by a few ounces then it goes up a little more then it goes down then it goes up a bit more. However it seems each week my base number has been going slowly down. Four weeks ago it was 183 - now it is 180. Hopefully next week it will be 179.
Sometimes I just feel lazy. I want the results but I don't want to do the work. I will do the easy work - but I don't want to do that hard stuff. I will do this but I won't do that. I want the paycheck, but not the job! Well we all know that doesn't happen.
Sometimes you just have to have faith. Sometimes you just have to trust in the process and know if you do the right things, eventually the scale will catch up. Sometimes you have to do the right things even when you don't want to - because they are the right things and doing the right things seldom leads to regret.
So tonight I am taking another walk on the pier with a girlfriend. A long, slower paced walk. I'm going to give my knees a break, but still move.
Why? Because I am determined. Because I am committed. Because I am not going to quit just because of a silly number on the scale. Because I am fortunate and I CAN move - so - I shall. Because I have faith.
Because I gotta have faith, I gotta have faith (you singin with me???)