CRASH and BURN! YIKES!
Thursday, July 24, 2014
Two days back into Spark and I crash and burn. Fall off the wagon or whatever euphemism you choose to describe what most consider an epic failure.
For me food is my drug, my addiction, and when I am stressed, upset, anxious and even bored at times, I crave food. Not just any food, but really good comfort food. You know the kind, super high in calories and fat and oh so yummy.
So yesterday when I found out my sister-in-law passed away, I did what came naturally. I cooked and I ate, then I ate some more. White sauce chicken enchiladas, made with sour cream and jack cheese, brownies and even a slice of apple pie. I did include 2 full servings of veggies though to make me feel a bit better about all of my gluttony. It is how I cope...it is how I gained 50 lbs over the last 1 ½ year.
I have to admit that my first thought this morning was to avoid SparkPeople today, to not log in, not track what I ate yesterday, and not interact with my groups. And I knew from experience if I did that I would be stuck in my ways, still using food as a crutch and an excuse to not be successful. I also knew from experience that if I did this then tomorrow I would have similar excuses to not log in.
I think just acknowledging this is a good place to begin to start changing it. I am also not going to beat myself up too badly. This is just a minor derail and I can and will get back on track and be successful. Today, I chose to log in. I chose to track, weigh, measure and post. Today I will choose to eat better and get some structured exercise. Today I will get my Spark on.