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Sabotage or Kindness

Monday, October 14, 2013

Braum's Peanut Butter Cup Ice Cream. Back in the day, it was my favorite sweet temptation. Since January, I have had it exactly one time, and I thought, "huh, it's not as good as I remembered." I guess since I have been off the sugar, I have somewhat lost the taste for it.

My sister (with whom I live), went to Braum's the other day and came home with several cartons of their ice cream. Including Peanut Butter Cup.

We have not had this ice cream in the house since I decided to get healthy. The only people in our household who eat that flavor are my daughter and me.

My sister has been trying off and on over the last couple of months to lose weight, too, and she commented to someone else recently that she wished she had started back when I did in January and maybe she would have lost as much weight as I have. She has lost a few pounds but has generally not been very faithful to her eating and exercise plans so her results have been erratic.

I don't think she would ever sabotage me on purpose, but I am curious if subconsciously, that was her intent by bringing this ice cream home. Certainly it is possible that she was being thoughtful of my daughter, but she doesn't normally pick up that flavor when she goes since it isn't a family-wide favorite.

The good news is that I am really not interested at all in the ice cream sitting in the freezer. I look at that carton and I just think, "you are not worth undoing my hard work."

As for my sister, if she was being a saboteur, I will choose to remember how supportive she has been of my efforts. I will also choose to remember that taking those first steps to lose weight is really hard, and that sometimes seeing the success of others is a painful reminder of your own failure. If she is experiencing those feelings, she certainly deserves my sympathy and support.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Very mature attitude about all of it! It's great that you're able to resist the temptation without fixating on it too. emoticon emoticon
    2838 days ago
    She may be a little jealous of your success and I don't think it was conscious sabotage. She maybe thought, you've been doing so well, you need a treat every now and again. I would just tell her that bring items like that in undermine your efforts and that you would prefer that she not do so but that it was nice of her to think of you while shopping.
    2839 days ago
    I like your "choose to" mindset. Stick with it! :)
    2840 days ago
  • no profile photo CD13928790
    I think old habits die hard. (sister) Maybe subconsciously, who knows! But the cool thing is you DON'T want it!! YEAH!! emoticon
    2840 days ago
    I love how you are aware of this, but you didn't run yelling at her that she clearly must be trying to derail you and how awful she was. I am glad you don't think it was necessarily a direct attempt to sabotage you but yes it is weird that after so much time she'd put that flavor in the house. The good news is, by not touching it, you will show her how strong you are whether she was trying to sabotage you or not. :) Well done!
    2840 days ago
    you definitely have the right attitude, even if she secretly is jealous, you know she is very proud of her sister emoticon
    2840 days ago
    Choosing the right attitude! That is the best way to go. You are very impressive!

    2840 days ago
  • KIMPY225
    Sometimes people don't realize how hard it is to say NO. You mentioned she has been trying to lose weight off & on but is struggling. Maybe she was just thinking of you & remembered you liked it?
    Maybe you can tell her thanks but no thanks next time - she can bring other flavors for the other members of the house if she wants?

    2840 days ago
    People will go back and forth on this with you. Some people will say she is a saboteur, others will suggest that she needed someone to eat with so she didn't feel guilty, others will say she was just being kind. Maybe she's a food addict and knows you like the ice cream to and did it out of habit. Want to find out? Just ask her? Point blank, no accusations...ask.
    2840 days ago
    It may just be that she doesn't realize that you REALLY are serious. My husband used to bring home pineapple juice for me in the late PM, after I had finished eating for the day, and was hurt when I didn't want it. And he would say " it is healthy!!". Finally IU sat him down and explained clearly why I would rather "spend" my calories on other things.
    But it doesn't matter what her intention was, just your response. And good for you for giving her the benefit of the doubt.
    2840 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8040942
    I agree with FRUITY...you are so understanding! I don't know your sister, but my guess is that she wasn't trying to sabotage you. I think she is probably just not in a good place herself, and is subconsciously sabotaging herself. Maybe she sees weight loss as not hard for you since you are doing so well and thought that you wouldn't be tempted. At any rate, I would have a kind talk with her and let her know that you appreciate that she got it for your daughter but that losing weight is never easy for anyone and that you would rather not have your favorite flavor in the house next time she buys some.
    2840 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/14/2013 4:52:14 PM
    I don't blame you for being suspicious but I'm glad you looked at all other angles before landing on just one conclusion. I know what you mean about losing your taste for sugar. The first time I lost weight I cut my salt and sugar back and kept it there for so long that anything remotely salty made me bloated and something incredibly sugary upset my stomach. Some of my favorite things didn't taste good anymore. It's weird how those things work.

    You're an awesome sister and you're great for being understanding! emoticon
    2840 days ago
    You're a good sister!

    The subconscious works in weird ways. Take it as a kind thought and thank your stars that you're not drawn to its siren song anymore!
    2840 days ago
    You are so understanding. Your sister is lucky that you are. I would be curious about her intentions too. It might be sabotage, but unintentional sabotage. My husband used to do that to me, because he missed his "eating buddy". Sometimes sharing food or giving food is a person's way of connecting with others.

    Good job not letting the temptation get to you! If you have an outside freezer, I'd leave it in there, not in the kitchen where you see it daily!

    You're doing awesome!
    2840 days ago
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