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Not eating all chips...

Friday, August 23, 2013

Sat in front of teve with cravings. Not hungry, just craving...had nothing in the house. But wait... is there not a bag of nacho chips intended for daughter to go with taco soup?

Yes there was. Read the label - 495 calories in 100 grams... I exercised a lot yesterday so I still had 1700 cal left to eat. Measured 100 grams in a bowl, put the bag back in the cupboard and ate chips with the film I was watching.

Another 100 grams would not hurt, would it? Knew I was going down... wieghed the bag and it was 295 grams left. If I would give in and eat it all I would equal intake and outpu... all that effort for nothing. Decided against another 100 grams, too dangerous. Put the bag back in the cupboard, had a cup of tea and later went to bed.

If any of you are binge-eaters you know that this is highly uncharacteristic. It is also highly uncharacteristic for my former black-white person - either I eat well or I eat all in sight...

My emotions are really in a turmoil over this - I am very happy that it worked to be that "normal" and hope that I will be able to repeat it over and over. Eat dangerous stuff without bingeing...

But there is also a very disappointed little addict in my mind who screams "Hey! You are not supposed to do that! The rules are that if I can fool you into start eating something unplanned, you will go on as long as there is any tiny room at all in your stomach and even more... the rules are that you canĀ“t stop once you started!! The rules are that you are a victim to your disease!"

Yesterday I did very good. And today I will stay on track. One day at the time.

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  • no profile photo CD8574152
    Your insight is always so perceptive...AND inspiring, Meddy! emoticon
    2857 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10795864
    I think this is a fabulous accomplishment.

    I am still at the point, after about 4 years of my healthy journey, that if I eat off track, I will binge and can't shut it down.

    I compare eating on track to abstinence from alcohol--I figure out what I will be eating in the morning (I am not very varied in my food choices and tend to like the same things every day) and document them.

    If I am incredibly active and my fitbit gives me some more calories to eat, I will choose from my list of acceptable snacks, which for some reason do not trigger a binge.

    But if I eat off track anything that is not on my internal acceptable list, it is like I have gone off the wagon.

    I know this is not the healthiest attitude towards food, but I am maintaining a healthy BMI and work out regularly.

    If I could do what you did, stopping a binge, I would consider that an incredible breakthrough for me. Good for you!
    2857 days ago
  • no profile photo CD13966857
    That really is great, important progress. If you could do it this time there's no reason you can't keep on doing it.
    I always want to know 'what happened that allowed you to do this'. What have you been doing differently that made it possible / easier for you this time to stop? To know what factors are at play may mean you can repeat whatever it was that enabled you to make these choices this time.
    I had a similar experience last week when I managed to stop once I started to binge. In my case, I think that it was practicing with 'stop eating when full' that allowed me to do that, I had been training myself (for just a few weeks) to be more mindful of how hungry / full I am. Maybe some of the things you've been doing in the past weeks has trained you, too, to get to this point.
    Very emoticon
    2857 days ago
    emoticon A definite NSV!! One day at a time.
    2857 days ago
  • KITT52
    2857 days ago
    Impressive!! emoticon
    2857 days ago
    Good job! Deciding against indulging again in chips when they are right there in front of you is amazing. emoticon
    I wish I could say I resisted in the same way today.
    2857 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12681982
    Congratulations! I never win when I go up against the chip! So proud of you!

    2857 days ago
  • no profile photo CD13976750
    You overcame - and that CAN'T BE BAD! emoticon

    As you say - 'One day at a time'

    emoticon emoticon
    2857 days ago
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