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First Skype Class and Sneezing

Monday, February 18, 2013

Today I had my first skype class session. Since I am still unable to get to class physically (next monday I should be going back just fine) I had to rely on others to help me out. So you can imagine how amazingly bummed I was to have my one lifeline that promised to help me by setting up Skype for me, decided she was going to skip class. I was a bit blown away. I scrambled trying to find someone else to help me and thank goodness I did. There are two things I would love to say on this topic-

1) I kept getting told that I wasnt missing anything in the class I was trying to get a Skype session for. Here's the thing; yes, this class is very different from other classes I have taken. We were pretty much told here are the assignments, do them but I am not going to comment on them as a teacher. You dont have due dates just get your s*it done and you'll be fine. Our class sessions are mainly just discussions about Mount Everest, our topic of forced focus. I have become more focused and organized in this class because of this set up. It has made me more intent on staying on top of my work load because of the set up. These class discussions we have are important to me, regardless of how asinine or unimportant they may seem to others.

The whole point of me setting up a Skype session for my classes is to get the information and to show my teachers that I am dedicated to graduating on time and getting my work done. I should not have to justify that to any of my classmates. They should not decide for me what is important and what isnt. I just really was taken aback at the reactions. If I deem it important, why should I be told not to worry? UGH!

2) I really found out what it means to rely on people when you're down and out. Its a funny thing to think, oh people will have my back then have them bail. I am so very thankful for the people who are working with me and going above and beyond to help me. They may not think its that big of a deal, but to me I am eternally grateful for the opportunity to not miss any bit of class, no matter what my situation.

I did not choose for this to happen, it was unfortunate and came at a really inopportune time. I was sitting in a doctors office, crying my eyes out because they were sticking me with an iv and I knew what it meant. They haddnt even gotten the results of my CT Scan and I just knew I would have to have surgery. I had to ask and ask, How long will I be down? How long? I was just so worried that all of my hard work up this mountain of higher education would come crashing down. I am due to graduate with credentials and a bachelors degree next spring. If I were to have to take a semester off, it wouldnt be until Spring 2015 that I walked with credentials. It was literally tearing me apart inside thinking, oh my god what do I do now? What happens if I have to postpone my schooling? I was so upset.

The second I got home (After a very long and necessary nap) I started sending out emails and facebook posts. I wanted to make sure that I could Skype some sessions and be present in class even if I wasnt physically present. To me, this is a dedication that is necessary. People told me I was crazy and that I should just rest. Take the time off to relax. NOPE! I need this. I need to be included. This is why I am just so very amazingly grateful to the people who are helping me out. It shows you who you can count on and who you cant. I wish it wasnt like that, that it didnt have to come off so callously, but to be told oh dont worry you arent missing anything is a huge slap in the face after what I went through. This was so unexpected and so crazy. In a day I went from fine to admitted to the hospital, cut on and doped up on morphine. I dont know maybe Im looking to far into this....

On another note, sneezing....SUCKS OH MY GOD! I know how bad my tummy hurt, i mean they did cut through muscle to get to my appendix and it hurt, but you never know just how bad until you have to sneeze. I sneezed and screamed OH MY GOD immediately after. I felt like I was being stabbed and it hurt for so long after. Like, hours. I had to take extra vicodin just to be able to handle the pain from sneezing. Thats unnatural....

So if I cant sneeze without pain and cant wear pants because I have cuts where my pants ride, why should anyone tell me what class is important or not? I feel so reliant and for an independent person, that is the epitome of hell. I cant wait to be healed up

Off to write a Noun Phrase paper about the Q'anjob'al language for my Linguistics class. Wish me luck! emoticon
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