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January 1st 2013

Tuesday, January 01, 2013

I need to lay out my plans so it seems more tangible!

Started spark 4 years ago.....
Starting weight was 255 lbs......
Heaviest non-pregnant weight 265 lbs.....
Lightest weight since trying to lose the weight 194 lbs in Jan 2012.....
Current Pregnant weight at 37 weeks 264 lbs.......
Goal weight for a happy healthy me 165 lbs........

That's right about 100 lbs to lose....I have gained back about 70 lbs that I had worked so hard to lose and the realization makes me many things.

Sad is the first one because I can still remember how good it felt to be losing the weight and wearing the clothes and being almost there.

The second is angry, why would I do this to myself again......I was a very unhappy angry person before and I never wanted to be like that again and here I am almost there.... but hit with the realization that I did it once I can do it again.

While its not a good excuse I am pregnant and have let myself slide because of cravings, tiredness, pain, emotions, and plain laziness!!! I had goals to gain 20 lbs max and I did nothing to meet those goals...... I am not gonna beat myself up about it but I am not going to let myself forget how easy it was to put the weight back on.

My hubby started a new job when I got pregnant, and since then he has lost about 50 lbs!!!! He is amazing, even though he made no real effort to lose that 50, since it was all due to more physical demands of his job, and his diet hasn't changed one bit.... it doesn't make me angry or jealous, it makes me proud and grateful. Now that he has a taste of what it feels like to get some of the weight off he has been so excited to get a gym membership and get the rest off!!! I love that!!!

We are going to have our 3rd and final baby some time this month and although I am so tired and sore and huge and ready to be DONE..... I want to make the most of the beginning of the new year and start it out by being in the right mindset! I will lose the weight again, and make it all the way this time and I will get to do it with my family!! Pregnant or not I can still get off this couch and go for a walk and drink my water and not eat 4-5 slices of pizza for dinner...... that is not healthy for anyone and I know that. Now I just need to do what I know how to about it!!!

Spark says at 2 lbs a week I will reach my goal by December 2013...... although an entire year to reach my goal seams very unappealing, I know the journey will be worth it and only help me in maintaining the new lifestyle I want!

So Sparkies here's to the new year, new goals, new babies, new outlooks on life and a new sense of self! I hope all your goals are met and all your challenges are overcome and you find your selves then people you were always meant to be.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SUGAHUNNY76
    I know that feeling emoticon all to well... hang in there! She will be here in no time emoticon And take it one day at a time, that's all that we can do. But for now enjoy this experience.



    See ya around emoticon
    2983 days ago
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