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STEPH-KNEE
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Hurt Thumb, Blah Days & Deal I Made...

Sunday, August 19, 2012

So Thursday night I cut my thumb by...well... being an idiot. I have this tall vase that is about 3 feet. I bought some pebbles and potpourri to fill it with. I didn't put too many pebbles and I did it very carefully. As I was filling it with potpourri, the bottom broke out from under it. That would have been fine except I couldn't leave well enough alone. Add on the fact that I'm already pretty clumsy and this is clearly a recipe for disaster. I wanted to see if the bottom could still fit back together, and in case you were wondering it can. I thought I was holding it tight enough and when I went to turn it over it slipped and I now have a huge gash in my right thumb. Over an inch long and pretty deep. I didn't go to get stitches and my mom agreed it should heal on its own. I am not looking forward to yet another scar, mainly because it'll remind me of my stupidity LOL. Doh.

Before that on Thursday, I had a great day out with my friends. Grilled cheese and fries for dinner and later an ice cream sundae from Denny's. It was a planned in advance treat day, and I still managed about 1800 calories, maybe closer to 1900 because I had to guess on the grilled cheese. But I have just been feeling blah. I have no valid reasons for it. I think the thumb thing triggered some sort of stress or pitty response from me, and I wanted to go and eat even more crap Thursday night but I made myself go to bed instead. That was a small victory. I ate well yesterday and today but still the blahs continue.

So this deal I made with my Gammie, and I basically thought it up and she is holding me to it... is that whenever I feel blah and I feel like you know what, I don't want to work at this weight loss stuff RIGHT NOW, I am not in the mood... that whatever weight I am at at that very moment, I will have to at least work to maintain. So if I decide this week I'm just not doing this, that means I need to maintain my 230lbs that I am right now. I checked a maintenance calculator and that puts me at about 2282. The funny part is I saw that number and I thought "well I don't want to eat THAT much". LOL.

I fully intend to push past the blahs, and just keep moving forward, but it's good to know that if I decide to take a "vacation" from weight loss, that it's not a free pass to go around gorging myself and eating whatever I want. I will still have to track all of my food and work at maintaining my current weight. The best part is, if this happens I know it won't be more than a week, because I will have to be doing the parts that I don't always like (tracking and not eating EVERYTHING), so I know it'll quickly make me want to be back on to the losing side of this journey. :)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • THESHELBSTER
    From my own personal experience, even when I am trying to lose weight, I still have so many slips. So if I ever tried to just maintain my weight loss, and slipped I would worry that my slips were even greater. My advice to you is that if you have a bad day you just get back up on the horse again the next day but don't ever downgrade all your hardwork to simply "maintaining." Maintaining is not going to get you in that sexy Cinderella outfit. :D
    3220 days ago
  • JACOBSBELOVED
    Keep your eyes on the prize, Stephanie! You've mentioned before that once you lost 40 lbs, then you started slipping back into old habits. I hope this isn't the beginning of that happening again. I have conflicting emotions about you taking a one week break to just maintain your weight, but it's ultimately your decision (obviously). I would love to see you keep going strong but I know we all get tired at some point.

    Hang in there, girl, and I can guarantee you that it will all be worth it.


    3220 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12383123
    Don't give up! Push through it, you will be glad you did!

    emoticon
    3221 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12088077
    Wait, this sounds like the first signs of giving up. No. You are NOT giving up.

    Stephanie, girl, you need to grab a hold of yourself, stop sulking, and get back up. You wanted to lose more than 40 pounds right? You will not do that by "maintaining" and then forgetting about it and moving on. Maintaining before reaching goal weight, when not for a life changing reason, is just giving yourself an excuse to not hit 50 pounds down.

    And girl- you want that 50 pounds sticker. You want to slide into 16s. You want to run and chase without gasping for air. You won't get that by "maintaining".

    Girlie, this isn't a "bandwagon" This isn't a "diet" This isn't something that you get to press pause on. This is a life change. You need to change your life, and you don't get a vacation from life changes.

    I'm sorry to be rough on you, but we all care about you and want you to succeed. So, fine take today to feel sorry for yourself, and tomorrow, you need to get up, and move forward. Don't you dare give up girl. You've worked too hard to stop now.

    emoticon
    3221 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12746945
    I agree with her. Keep on pushing yourself and don't quit. it's too easy to fall into those kinda ruts. It's even harder to get out of them the longer u stay in them especially if u decide to maintain for a week. When I feel like I don't wanna do it, I think hard about my health and WHY I'm here..I walk, I journal, I'll even go get a protein snack or something if I'm hungry (which can be a trigger for not wanting to do this). Try to keep your eye on the prize. You can do it. Keep on the losing side. And like the lady above me said, you're here and we're ALL rooting for you! If u ever need to vent or whatever, look me up if u want. I haven't been on all that long, but I'm firmly committed to this for the sake my health and well being. I just can't quit. I'm 37 and not getting any younger. Do this..You're fabulous and u can do this too!

    emoticon
    3221 days ago
  • PROJECT_SUSAN
    Oh please please please stick with this side of the journey. If you let yourself fall back, it will only be time that you could have been moving forward. No it isn't an easy road but don't let those thoughts get the best of you! You can do it!!!

    we are all here to help you! You don't have to do it alone.

    emoticon
    3221 days ago
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