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Friday, December 02, 2011

I work as a physical therapist assistant in various nursing homes. One of the homes I work in is primarily psychiatric. I worked there today and a resident refused to work with me because she said I was a big man and my belly was too big and I was twice her size. She said several other things but I will omit those. Mind you, she was late in getting her meds and she couldn't help saying what she said but on one hand she was not too far off base. This hit me as a shock because I have actually lost over 30# in the last 2 years and everyone tells me how "good" I look. Obviously, it's not as good as I would like to believe. The groan happened because I went home and was feeling pretty down about what that patient had said to me. My wife said, "go have some M&Ms, I just got some of the cherry ones".... so I did. Why did I eat those M&Ms? It certainly isn't going to make me look smaller in my patient's or anyone else's eyes. I am going to try and use this experience as a positive motivator to not listen to what friends and family say when they tell you to have more food or to eat to feel better. They think they are comforting you and they are trying to make you feel better but in the long run, they are unwittingly sabotaging you.
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    One of the things my TOPS leader said last night that is a new rule at the TOPS meeting is "no negative talk." She says when we hear ourselves about to say something that is not positive to edit ourselves and think, "is this necessary?"
    People can do a lot of damage with words. Of course, a patient may have no editing ability...but a lot of us do and we don't use it...and not only to observe the intentions of the words that we say to others but the ones that we say to ourselves. Just remember how far you have come and feel good about it. You can't do anything worthwhile by doubting yourself. emoticon
    3123 days ago
    It's so hard when people make comments like the people in your office or having a love one tell you to eat when that's not what you need. My husband does that kind of thing to me too and I know he means well but it doesn't always work like that. Just keep hanging in there and remember all the good comments you've gotten so far. 30 pounds is pretty impressive!
    3508 days ago
  • TAV0120
    I am so sorry about this. It is so hard not to turn to food when we are so use to it. I have had in the past my kids friends make comments about my weight and it just kills me inside. But I know it is so hard to have your spouse not on board with you totally. I have to stop blaming him, but my husband does not help at all. He says he will support me but in the same sentence he wants to order pizza, go out for dinner etc.
    3519 days ago
    Oh I'm so sorry about this! What an awful way to spend the day at work and then to come home feeling defeated. I know we all tend to want to comfort ourselves and others with food, and it's a hard habit to break. Maybe next time you can tell your wife what you'd really love is for her to take a walk with you...or if you live in snow country like I do, a drive even. I know driving isn't exercise, but it is far from the m&m's.
    Sending hugs. Hang in there! emoticon
    3521 days ago
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