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JMARIES51
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A Meaningful Comment on my Blog is an AH HA Moment for ME

Saturday, October 15, 2011

"I just wish you would have enjoyed it more!" Justducky1405 AKA Kendra (one of my longest and best supporter on Spark)

It probably doesn't seem like such a huge thing to say, but for me it was that emoticon that I hadn't realized while I was out last night.

I don't usually go out on Friday nights anymore because lately I haven't been working Thursdays or Fridays. But my boss was out of town and I worked Friday by myself. The day had been especially busy, a lot of people complaining about their bills, not enough money to pay them, angry about their insurance rates, etc.

When I got home, there was plenty of time to take the dogs for a nice long walk, which is what we did. There was a gorgeous sunset and I was really enjoying the night. So when my other half asked if I wanted to go out for dinner, I kind of hummed and hawed. I knew that if I went out, I would have a difficult time keeping my calories under control. I had a good dinner planned to make, but being tired, and relaxed, I thought, OK, why not.

I had never been to the place where we went for dinner. It is a small, sandwich type shop that has soup, sandwich, salad type menu. I just wasn't in the mood for a soup (clam chowder or chili). I didn't feel like salad would be enough protein. So I choose the most greasiest, oiliest sandwich on the menu and got onion rings as a side.

Now how did that comment become the AH HA moment for me? I realize now that what I ordered was really self sabotaging. I had a ton of excellent choices on the menu. My friend suggested a salad and made a comment like... there isn't anything on this menu you can eat. At that moment my brain became a 2 year old and I rebelled and said, I can eat anything on this menu I want. So doing the passive/aggressive thing, I ordered the most fattening thing on the menu and got it with fried onion rings on the side. The onion rings came with a dipping sauce that was also nothing but fat. So there you have it. I am not proud to say it, but it is true. My 2 year old rebellious child went out to dinner and made rotten choices for my grown up body. And in the end, I didn't enjoy it at all. Even after I got home I continued to rebel by eating a huge piece of banana bread, and 6 small chocolate candy bars that are put away for Halloween.

So in my anger I wrote all of this down in CAPITOL LETTERS. Wow, I didn't even realize how mad I really felt. Looking at it this morning, I can see all the anger in my statements. Now I am beginning to feel really happy about the whole thing. It is an eye opening moment for me. I have made a great plan for today and it is the plan that I would have had for any Saturday. So back to being an adult and leave the 2 year old on back on Friday night. She had her tantrum and now the adult is back in my body.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • no profile photo CD6805483
    Kuddos to you for reflecting on the night, realizing what happened and learning from the whole thing. I've found that people's comments about what I eat can also bring out the inner 2 year old in me too...I think i might be blogging about this topic, as something relatively similar happened to me...
    3298 days ago
  • JMARIES51
    Thank you everyone for your comments on this blog. Just to report, my weight was up one pound for the week. Hopefully this will come off next week. I am back on track and feel like I have that 2 yr old under control, at least for today.

    3301 days ago
  • KARBIE18
    Very cool that you recognize that two-year-old, and you learned so much from her actions. You will certainly make better choices the next time you are in a similar situation.

    Go you!!
    3301 days ago
  • no profile photo CD9392719
    You and Kendra are so special to each other. I'm glad you help the other and both learned from it. I for one, am learning from this blog -- cause, yes, I been there too. Just yesterday!!!
    3301 days ago
  • KITT52
    Lesson learned...don't let it derail you , today is a new day, a clean slate and you have learned something about your self..

    Have a healthy week
    3301 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8158758
    It is something we all go through-at least I do! Quite often and it always happens at restaurants! Why we do that and keep doing it-when we figure that out, we could be billionaires! emoticon
    3302 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10163029
    emoticon yep, i get that, been there, done that! 2 yr old & all!!! LOL ;)

    (i do think the power of choosing is liberating... we are free to choose and when we do I think it should be looking it in the eye and enjoy it thoroughly, guilt free instead of head in the sand/rebellion where there is a frenetic i'm being bad sense to it... b/c the 2 yr old is right, we can choose anything... we just need to look beyond the immediate sense of the 2 yr old want right then/now and decide do we really wanna? b/c sometimes I do, and that's ok... and in other words, i have been trying to work on... choosing when i'm not feeling compulsive & can enjoy... and trying to break that urge/resist that when it hits for not so good reasons, like rebellion... (sighs)... you'll get this thoug, epiphanies r good & what helps us grow ;)
    3302 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10937514
    I hope you are able to stick to your plan and that you are going to have a good time while you enjoy your healthy day. I'm sorry you had a bad day, but you learned from it and have doubled your resolve to continue on this journey. You are triumphant because you didn't let your one bad day ruin your progress for the rest of the week. Lots of hugs! emoticon
    3302 days ago
  • JUSTDUCKY1405
    How fitting, my dear friend, Joann!
    emoticon

    Yours was an internal temper tantrum! Mine affected my entire sp friends list. But, yes, in an odd kind of way, I'm glad we both had our temper tantrums on the same day.

    Okay!

    Good bye 2 year old Joann! Good bye 2 year old Kendra!

    Thanks for this blog, Joann!
    I love and appreciate you soooo much!

    And, I'm glad my simple comment got you thinking differently!

    Good bye anger.
    3302 days ago
  • WOLFSPIRITMOM
    Yes, try and enjoy everything! Thanks!
    3302 days ago
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