Tuesday, September 06, 2011
"Moving on" sounds sort of bad and makes me feel a bit guilty. Yes, i'm one of those people who feels guilty about everything!
It's been a little over a month since my dad passed away and it still hasn't really sunk in. I still walk past his bedroom and forget that he isn't there. When i see his empty recliner in the livingroom, it's very hard to come to terms with the fact that i'll never see him there again. The paperwork has started coming in, too, so there are plenty of reminders that he isn't here. We also need to find a probate attorney, which i dread.
Back to the "Moving On" part . . . tonight i finally set a new short term goal for myself - actually it isn't a new goal, but a revisited goal. And that is to simply be able to do one standard pushup. i would think that after all the workouts i've completed (Zumba, TurboJam, CLX, 30-Day Shred) that i would be able to do this seemingly simple thing, but no! i wonder now if i'm just too heavy to do it, since it requires pushing up one's own body weight. i can do the modified ones, but i REALLY want to be able to do the regular ones. i'm going to work at it anyway, fat or not. It would be so nice to be able to wear a tank top.
I saw a video on Youtube that suggested doing planks and holding them for 20 seconds, 3 times. So i'll try that and see what happens.
Also, since my dad's memorial, we had leftover junk food, which i indulged in. Normally i can steer clear of that stuff, but under the circumstances, i thought i needed to give myself a little extra leeway. But now, nearly 5 pounds gained later, i feel like i've gotten that out of my system and can return to eating better.
i know this sounds simplistic but i think small changes are a good way for me to start at this particular juncture. :)