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How do I motivate my husband to loose weight and get fit?

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

On a regular basis women visit the various men's forums here on SP to post a "question for the quys".

A lot of them carry a similar theme to this one posted recently:

"can i ask you guys a question? be completely honest! what would be the
best way for a girl to get her guy to work out? what would be the most motivating
thing for you to hear, when before you just didn't want to do it at all?"

The most common response is SEX, specifically oral sex.

While I can attest that sex is a STRONG motivator for men. It needs to be qualified with: If you have a strong relationship and good healthy sex life already.

If he already believes that his sex life is rationed out or has to be earned Sex will not be a very good motivator and actually make matters worse.

The recommendation for sex, assumes a good relationship and healthy sex life is already in place.

But I strongly suspect there is a greater issue that is being ignored.

When women ask questions like this it leads me to wonder if the relationship is not already damaged in other areas. If we are acting lovingly toward one another that love in itself would lead to "good works" toward one another. Both short term and long term.

That being said I would work on improving my overall relationship as that would seem to be the underlying issue. Not whether he will work out or not.

Disclaimer: "Free advice is worth what you pay for it." This post is no exception to that rule.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • N0_EQL
    This is still the correct answer for this situation from a male perspective and this was posted in a Male forum.

    You can choose to do with the information as you prefer.

    Blessings
    N0_EQL
    3415 days ago
  • N0_EQL
    Agreed,

    Cohesion does not work.

    Encouragement does work. As does rewards for success. It is the premise that under girds the success of Spark People.

    Your statement: "We lead by example, take care of yourself and that will encourage your husband to follow!" Is not correct. There is no direct correlation between your actions and the actions of another.

    Human behavior is so unpredictable that your spouse may get jealous or even envious of your success and ignore or reject you. Your journey should be personal, for your own benefit. Not motivated by If I do this He/She will do that.



    3424 days ago

    Comment edited on: 7/29/2011 11:19:26 AM
  • JOABEHR
    The bottom line is. . . . you can't force or coherse anybody to loose weight. We lead by example, take care of yourself and that will encourage your husband to follow!
    3424 days ago
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