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Doing ok today!!

Monday, July 18, 2011

I'm doing okay today. I felt all weekend like I needed a soft drink. So this morning after I took my wife to work, I went and got me a mellow yellow. I thought when I got it that "Everything is going to be ok, all my problems are going to be gone, finally mellow yellow has saved me from my desperate feeling" So I get to the store, walk in I just have to have that soft drink, I got to have it, then I go to the cooler, there it is in front of me, it was 16.0 ounces but to me it looked like 1000 ounces, bigger than life. I reach in and grab it, I felt like it was the last one and no one better take my mellow yellow, although there was a 1000 more in the cooler this was my soft drink and no one better touch it, I started walking to the counter, with every step I was anticipating that first drink, after all it had been 5 days since I had one and it felt like million days. I paid the cashier and thought to myself "Yes, I have one its only a matter of time now, until that wonderful tasting soft drinks will make everything perfect. I get to my car, start it up and put it in reverse, then in drive and I'm on my merrily way. I'm almost home, anticipation still growing, getting stronger and stronger, then finally I'm home, can't wait to get inside and sit down with my breakfast and open it and drink that wonderful tasting green liquid. I'm there at the table, breakfast in front of me, and then, and then I open the lid, and put it up to my mouth and take the drink I had been looking for, for all so many years, well it felt that long anyway, lol So I take the drink and all the problems are.... Hummm, where's the feeling? Where's that feeling that everything is right in the universe, hummm, I don't feel anything. It wasn't there anymore. Have I broken the feeling of having to have one at all times? I don't really want one anymore. I can live with them or without them. I will go back to drinking tea and be perfectly happy with it. Oh and nothing has changed in the universe. I guess the moral of the story is: When you feel like you just got to have it, don't, drink your tea or water, and life will be great:-)))
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