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SHERLYN-WILL

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"I am Sherlyn and "I AM A FOOD ADDICT!" Are you?

Monday, January 17, 2011

My name is Sherlyn and I AM A FOOD ADDICT! Are you?


I am a Food Addict . I AM A FOOD ADDICT!

“FOOD ADDICTS are people with a physiological sensitivity to certain foods that react negatively in their system. Willpower has nothing to do with it, and neither does moral character. Pg. 12 of the “Why Can’t I Stop Eating” book.

“You can’t change your biological makeup, but you can change your tendencies. As a person with cancer must undergo radiation therapy, a food addict must avoid certain substances.” (pg. 12 same book)

As soon as these certain foods enter our system, we physically crave more and more of them, and no matter how much is eaten, it will never be enough. Just as an alcoholic craves alcohol, some people physically crave certain foods.

I decided to start a series of blogs as I uncover layers of denial in my eating habits!

Some of you sparkers will be able to relate to my blogs and others won’t. I thank you now for your support either way! I am here to support all of you too.

Some will not relate because they don’t view food the way I do and they don’t have trigger foods and foods they find addictive.

Some will not relate because they are in denial. I was there too!
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Brief overview of the last 6 mos. here on Spark. I had prayed to God for an answer to lose weight… I found a blog TWO-TOO-MUCH wrote about having success with losing weight.

*I started the eating plan July 24th. I lost weight every week. I was energized and feeling super good! I got to a place in a few short weeks where food didn’t even cross my mind unless I was hungry. Food became FUEL….

*I lost inches, pounds, clothing sizes and gained a healthy relationship to food.

*I did all this through probably some of the most stressful times I have ever had. Family issues, major financial issues, and many long working hours. I also did all of this and still had all the junk food and trigger foods in my house. Yeah those comfort foods aka ‘old friends’ winked and waved at me but I just didn’t care about them anymore.


Thanksgiving 2010 I ate on plan all day then I had a rice krispie treat, then the next day I had more sweets and more trigger foods and this went on for 3 days.

The whole month of December was a tug of war with me going back to some of my ‘old loves” and having a fling! LOL
I would eat on plan one day and off plan the next!
I WAS IN SERIOUS DENIAL!!! ( I will blog about Denial soon)


NEEDLESS to say I was STRUGGLING BIG TIME!

I kept strength training and managed to shrink some more and got into the next pants size down. It was a brief visit with those 8’s!

We had several more problems or obstacles arise in December and more family issues with our son (which is just life and everyone has problems) and my “playin’ around with fire” resulted in some ALL OUT BINGES!

The old me resurfaced and I have had a major relapse! I had not seen that “OLD ME” for almost 5 months and I sure didn’t miss her! (I will blog about RELAPSES later since they are a very real part of being a food addict)

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In a nutshell though.. RELAPSE is “walking backward through the recovery process toward the disease, discarding recovery tools along the way. The relapse process is complete when the individual returns to the use of the addictive substance, at which time the disease is triggered at the physical level by the substance.” Quoted from the article “Avoiding Food Addiction Relapse” by Kay Sheppard

“Relapse does not begin with the first bite of addictive substances. It is a spontaneous, usually unconscious, process which ends with binge eating.” Again from Kay’s article .

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Ok..
So this walking backwards has now led me to dig deep and figure out what happened!

I could feel me putting on weight these last few weeks and of course I knew why! Inches happened first then pounds.

I have felt major depression (not sure what all the reasons are for that one ? although I know some of it is from what the junk food does to me with mood swings sugar highs and lows) I am normally an upbeat positive person and this has been strange to me.

I just could not seem to muster up the WILLPOWER to get back on track!

Every stinkin’ day I would plan to stay on track and EVERY STINKIN’ day I didn’t!

I prayed and prayed for God to show me what information I needed to see or what thoughts and memories I needed to recall to move forward!

A good friend here on Spark shared her copy of Dr. Debbie Danowski’s WHY CAN’T I STOP EATING?” (thank you H for that!)

GET this I had followed Debbies plan from July to December and I had never even read the book yet! LOL
(finances had been so tight that I could not justify buying the book! )
SO thank you fellow sparker for blessing me with this book! You were used of God!


I am reading and learning and researching the web and finding information on being a food addict!

I even searched spark for “food addict” and was blown away by the people that had blogged about feeling like they were one but not knowing what to do!


So my next blog will continue this journey!
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Give me your feedback on this blog if you have any comments or questions! I will be posting a NEW BLOG TOMORROW about signs and symptoms of a food addict. STAY tuned!

I never wanted to believe there was such a thing as addicted to food because I thought it was just an excuse people used for overeating!

NOW I know I was wrong and I believe this is a very REAL DISEASE! BUT.. there is hope because I have experienced ongoing day to day recovery from July to December! I literally would FLY above the pull of food! AMEN!


Thanks for all your friendship and support on my journey!
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Here is the damage done from the relapse:

Wgt. Was 172 first of Dec. I dipped to 169 for a brief visit (I will blog to explain that later since I got there during my backtracking journey)

Today I was 180.5

BUT this is ok.. COZ I have stopped it in it’s tracks and this girl is NOW MOVING FORWARD!

I am AWARE that I can JUST get back on the plan and lose the weight (AND I WILL DO THAT) but this time I have different motives for getting back on my eating plan (see 9-17 blog).

Before my motive was to "lose the weight" THIS time my motive is FREEDOM from this battle of being addicted to certain foods and FREEDOM from losing and gaining weight
And FREEDOM from the pull of certain foods!

I am not going back to the girl I used to be!

With God's help I am going to figure out the deeper issues and causes.

This Journey THIS TIME has no end!
There is no more 'lose the weight' and then go back to the old ways!

Stay tuned beautiful sparkfriends!

PS I am 100 percent back on my eating plan today and I will get past the withdrawals within 3 days!
I will post my daily weight for you to see my progress!
I remeasured too so I can see inches lost.





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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • KRITTERKEEPERS
    Sherlyn, I am so glad I ran across your blog. I am a carbohydrate addict. Refined carbs send me into the abyss you speak of. I will be adding you as a friend and tracking your success!
    emoticon
    3181 days ago
  • DSJB9999
    Have added you as a friend as I Donna am a FOOD ADDICT too. Although I haven't much time to read your blog I know I'd like to return to your words of wonder! Very enlightening! Thank youl.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon Donna x
    3190 days ago
  • MEDDYPEDDY
    Yes, I am a food addict although I am not sure of what foods... I am senistive to food that I consider "forbidden" but I am not sure what the substances are, there are some foods without sugar or white flour that seem to trigger me – any meat from pigs for example, so I have focused more on behaviour, to find what kind of attitude and actions that starts the rollercoaster...

    Wonderful blog!
    3190 days ago
  • no profile photo N_STITCHES
    Sherlyn----I'm so glad I found your blog. This is me! I knew I was different. I felt like I had an eating disorder or something, but not sure what. Thank you for blogging about this. I look forward to reading more......Patti
    3192 days ago
  • WOMANCHEF
    I am a food addict too. It is a daily struggle for me. Thank you for your post.
    3193 days ago
  • SUNNYWBL
    I am a food addict, too!

    My drug of choice is hard candies, candy canes, and toffees. I don't just suck on them for a while, I actively chew on them!

    Before Christmas, it was was hard crusted breads. I finally found a small french baguettes that were 4-5 ounces. Not as much damage from that amount. And I go to that store only once a week.

    I'm crunching on the last few pieces and then, cold turkey.

    Sunny
    3193 days ago
  • CANARYKARI
    Thanks for your post. It sounds like you and I are in the same place. (see my blog of today) I know exactly how you are feeling and I have no other explanation for it whatsoever except addiction. Thanks for helping me help myself!!!! I am getting back on today! I can't stand this feeling either!!!!
    emoticon emoticon
    3193 days ago
  • HLTHYETER
    Yes Sherlyn I am a food addict and I too believe it is for real. One must always be on guard and not let down or we will pay. Thanks for sharing some tough things.

    Keep on keeping on.
    3193 days ago
  • JENNYAMHSTYEDU1
    Awesome blog, Sherlyn! Off to read today's blog!!
    3193 days ago
  • DONNA0256
    Great blog and very courageous to face down your demons! I know for me the more sugary treats I have, the more I want. I never really considered food as addictive since my addition of choice was nicotine. Now that I've given that up, the sugar calls!!!! I do not want to exchange one addiction for another, so I am resisting. I may have to check out your September blog and see what this is all about. Thanks!
    3193 days ago
  • SHANTISHANTI
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    3193 days ago
  • KIMSFITJOURNAL
    Dr. Oz just did a show ( yesterday) on Food Addiction, very enlightening.
    3193 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/18/2011 11:50:17 AM
  • AMBERADAMS1
    I have been kind of watching your journey from afar and you definitely inspire me! Like you, I definitely believe people can be food addicts and I am one of them. I have flirted with the idea for over a month to try your eating plan. Thank you so much for sharing it in your September post. I can't wait to read your future blogs and learn from you. Best of Luck to you!
    3193 days ago
  • BESTLIFE79
    Yes, I too am a food addict. I used to think it was an excuse too. Just like any other addiction, I have binges and once I start I can't stop till its "over." "One is too much but a thousand is never enough" can describe a binge for me. Your blog has given me much hope-- I battle this every day, and little by little I AM getting stronger-- I have been on my knees with God MANY times, begging Him to free me. I also wanted to just lose weight, but over time realized I REALLY just wanted to be free from such a horrible addiction.

    I just realized after my last binge that peanut butter is a trigger food- once I start I can't stop and it leads me into the rest of the pantry. Live and learn! Im looking forward to more blogs about this-- keep it up!
    3193 days ago
  • SPARKIE1964
    I am eagerly awaiting your forthcoming entries, for I too have recently acknowledged that I have several addictions, including food. My trigger foods are rice and bread. Without them in my life, the pounds melt off. Then, I crave them and you know what happens from that...I have read that saying you can't have them just encourages you to crave them more. So I "try" (killer right there) to manage it with small portions which I cannot do. So am truly looking forward to learning from what you're reading...Write on my friend...Teach me!
    3193 days ago
  • 4DOGNIGHT
    Thank you for your blog. I can definitely relate and can't wait to read your blog tomorrow. One moment on the lips, a liftime on the hips!
    3193 days ago
  • BETHBEE2101
    You are amazing..... glad I have you as a friend because you are always posting something I need to read.......

    emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • LINTPICKER
    I was doing great too until Thanksgiving and Christmas. Too many cookies and desserts! Now I still log my food, but I have a tendancy to not be exact and have too much. I keep wanting sweets. I will be reading your blogs!
    3194 days ago
  • HEART2HOME
    Good for you! You were able to recognize what needs to happen and you're doing it!!
    I know you'll be alright--and I have complete faith in you! emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • AMBERHENLEY
    As a fellow food addict I can't wait for your future blogs! I'll be adding you as a friend so I can keep an eye out for your blog posts. emoticon emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • LOOZINITNOW
    You would not believe how much this blog hit home for me. Thank you so much! I am really looking forward to reading more and grasping as much info as I can. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.
    3194 days ago
  • no profile photo GWENAEL
    What an amazing blog! I'm still crying! I can sooo relate to you! Thanks for sharing yourself with us!

    I am a food addict too, but I'M NOT MY ADDICTION!

    Count me as one of your followers! I'll be reading all your blogs thoroughly! You are a true SP motivator!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • SKFEREBEE
    I am a member of the Spark Sugar and Food Addiction team, so believe me, you are not alone. We are all here to support you. One step back, one giant leap forward! Since Saturday I've been eating mostly clean, and I have lost 4 pounds and will probably be down another pound tomorrow. You fill your body with junk, and it turns into junk (and not just in the trunk). I know this will be a hard week adjusting mentally to what I need to do, but I have put myself on a 120-day challenge, so I know with that length of time I can truly change my habits and body at the same time. We are women, hear us roar! We can do this!!! emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • RUDBEKIA
    This is such a great blog, like a breath of fresh air! I have called myself a food addict for months now, not necessarily knowing the proper definition for it. But deep down I knew I was one. I even wrote a blog a few months ago comparing my relationship with food to that of an alcoholic who craves his next drink... Imagine!
    All this to say, THANK YOU! Thank you for sharing, for your honnesty and for your courage. Yes, it took courage to look into this issue and try to get to the bottom of it!
    You have my attention, and my support. You can do this, we all can!
    Good luck!
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    3194 days ago
  • TEACHINMOM
    Oh yes I am a food addict! DH and I talked about relapses just today. It's a frightening part of this journey for me.
    So glad you're back on your plan.....CONGRATS for stopping this now!! I'll be watching for those blogs!!
    emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • LIVERIGHTNOW
    Well your blog is certainly a "mouthful" worth chewing on. Good job. I totally agree - there is addictive food behavior and their are triggers. I'm not so sure about your quest for freedom from the battle. I believe our food addiction will always be a battle...like other addictions- alcohol or gambling, for example. I think we will always have to be vigilant. Thank you for sharing...will look forward to future entries.
    3194 days ago
  • SHANTISHANTI
    Wow, I love your honesty Sherlyn...and now that we both know what to do, let's get to it. You are on a journey and I am happy to be right by your side. See you on "the team." Big Hug.
    3194 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/17/2011 8:36:35 PM
  • TWO-TOO-MUCH
    You know, of course, that sugar is my poison too. We've all struggled over the past few weeks, it seems, and I know that together, we'll all get back on track again, too. Find our mojo, so to speak. ;-)

    The depression you spoke of probably is borne of the sugar...it certainly alters my mood, too.

    But those mistakes are behind us and we'll just fly on past them. :)

    (My grandson is in hospital again, Sherlyn, after another major seizure again. Your good thoughts and prayers would be much appreciated. I'm wrecked. :( I wish it were me, and not him.)



    3194 days ago
  • RAGGEDY_ANN
    I'm a food addict too... emoticon emoticon
    3194 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/17/2011 8:27:55 PM
  • HAPPYWALKER
    I just finished writing my blog and then I read yours...we are in the exact same place! I SO understand how you feel. We can overcome this. All it takes is belief and faith - determination and unwaivering commitment to beating food addictions. I'll be interested in reading your upcoming blogs. HUGS
    3194 days ago
  • WARMSPRINGDAY
    Yes, and nothing revealed it more than when my mother died. How easy it was to fall back into that trap, and I'm still struggling. Hats off to you for your honesty and coming to grips with reality. Putting our heads in the sand just doesn't get us anywhere!
    3194 days ago
  • LUNADRAGON
    I know that personally, whenever I start eating chocolate candy - it throws me totally off, and turns on my appetite button full steam. So, I did the same with the holidays, and am working on getting on target again too.
    3194 days ago
  • XFITSTRONG
    Been thinking about you! I know it is hard and I totally understand the food addiction! Will be praying for you these next 3 days! Looking forward to your next blogs.
    3194 days ago
  • 2BFREE2LIVE
    Welcome back my friend. I know when someone is not active on the site there is a problem. I am always here for you, please know that. I know you can get back on track your strong. Hugs. Sandy
    3194 days ago
  • AKAFIT
    I know that food addiction is very real. For a long time I didn't want to admit my unhealthy relationship with food. I used food for EVERYTHING in my life. It wasn't until I started realizing how I was allowing the sin of overeating to control me that I really begin to start to see the realities of my eating.

    I thank you for posting this. It is such a hard thing because we HAVE to eat. However, what I have learned is that I don't have to have four or five pieces of pizza when one will do. I don't have to have a whole bowl of cheese, chips, salsa and sour cream when just the actual serving sizes will satisfy. I don't have to eat my plate clean when my hunger is already satisfied. I don't have to continue to poison my body and system by eating too much and justifying it to others and to myself.

    I will definitely be staying tuned to your blogs.
    3194 days ago
  • JANEDOE12345
    You just hit on a lot of common reasons we are all on Spark. Keep it up. I will be reading as you go along. It was very helpful to have read your insights.
    Pam
    3194 days ago
  • LORIDREX
    emoticon You are sure doing your homework! emoticon emoticon
    3194 days ago
  • JGMK55
    God is with you...He is and your adventure in learning is powerful. I have missed you and just stopped by to see what was up. Glad to see you back - I will certainly keep praying for you.
    3194 days ago
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