Starting Weight: 466.6
SP SW: 416.2
Last Week: 339.2
Goal this Week: 337.2
Actual Weight: 339.4
Loss/Gain: +0.2 pounds
I warned yesterday that I wasn't expecting a good weigh-in today. Why?
1) I've been an emotional wreck and I know that stress can lead to weight gain.
2) I added in some stress eating this week. Not at all good, but I tried to hold myself back as much as possible. I certainly didn't give in to every impulse!
3) I ate out much of the week. Why, hello, sodium...nice to see you again! ...NOT!
4) I didn't work out much this week. I had to force myself to the gym yesterday in order to get in my 2 swipes a week at the gym required by the insurance company's weight loss program.
5) I didn't drink all my water. Not at all. Some days it was almost non-existent.
6) I didn't get enough sleep due to the stress.
So all of these things could have lead to a massive (or at least in my mind) gain on the scale today. All week I'd been watching my weight hover in the low 340s, and I knew that even the chanting of 338, 338, 338 wasn't going to make a difference today because I woke up bloated (my ankles are a little tight, which means they are slightly swollen).
Why didn't I have a huge weight gain this week then?
1) I ate less most days. There were days when I'm sure I went over...days I even forgot to track, but I was always conscious of what I was doing. The little rebel in me fought hard, but there were times that I simply won over by sheer stubbornness.
2) I did not let a few "bad" days dictate the rest of my week. Every morning I woke up with the thought that it was a new day with new opportunities and I had the choice to make the most of them.
3) (As MEZZOANGEL so kindly pointed out), I went to the gym even when I didn't want to. I remember Wednesday and the little fit my inner lazy rebel dished out, but I fought against it and went anyway. I cried through my workout. I focused my gaze on a nail in the wall and ran on the elliptical out of anger and fear and hurt feelings, and a dozen other emotions. It was not a happy workout...but it was a workout I made happen.
4) Even when my choices were bad, they were better than they used to be. Let's face it, I did not go to the store and buy Suzy Q's and Ho-Hos and 2 candy bars and coke. I pouted at home and, instead, rebelled with a grilled cheese on whole grain bread with light Campbell's tomato bisque soup.
5) When I was feeling out of it, I didn't withdrawal and hide. I was present. I showed up, and I made my frustrations known. I let it out in an attempt to let it go. Sometimes the support of Sparkies, even in the darkest hours, can lead you back to the light or keep you afloat. Don't underestimate the buddy system!
6) I used distraction methods for eating, and positive rebuttals to negative thoughts. "I still have so far!" was combated with, "And you've COME so far!" And "I hate these 24s!" was rebutted with "But they are beautiful and you are getting closer every day to making them part of your every day routine!"
That is what I attribute an only .2 gain (mostly bloat, I think I can safely say) to. In some ways, I am more proud of that .2 pound gain than I was of many of my previous losses. I needed this week, for some reason. And I got through it. And now I'm moving on.
So now we've reached Turkey week...and my goals look a little like this:
Weight Goal: 337.2
Calories Consumed: 1600-2200 per day
Calories Burned: 2270 for the week
* No eating out. I can go one week without eating out anywhere after the week I just had! Who is going to join me on this one week challenge? Should be made slightly easier this week with Thanksgiving coming up, a time to be thankful for the abundance of food we have available in this country - good food that's good for us and fuels our bodies!
* Water overload! I do best now on 10 glasses a day, so that will be my goal this week. I need to flush this sodium out of my system. Ethan asked me yesterday what was so bad about salt, so I'm going to do some research and have a talk with him about it this week. We'll both learn and teaching is always the best way for me to learn!
* Head held high! I made it through a very crappy and emotional week without trying to kill myself with unhealthy food. I made some bad choices, yes, but I made some very good ones as well. May this week be a lesson to me for the upcoming weeks left in this year and in the year to come!
My Turkey week plan:
Sunday - I'd like to get out for a walk sometime today. If my hips and legs feel up to it, I plan on giving myself the gift of a running spurt or two. If not, just walking the dog would be nice. I'll also do some cooking for the week. Going to make some pasta dish (which will make Hubs extremely happy) - a form of Chicken Alfredo with Broccoli - and then our every-week staple of Tator Tot Casserole with ground chicken.
Monday - Short day at work #1. Only 3 8-hour days this week! I'm going to be productive and, after work, I'm going to reward myself with yoga class and some ST!
Tuesday - Short day at work #2. I need to make sure I finish up everything that needs to be done, I don't want anything hanging over my head for the holiday. After work, I'm going to reward myself with my choice at the gym. I might go for a walk/run, or I might hit the elliptical. I might row, I've been missing that. Either way, I'll hit my calories burned goal for the day and make up for whatever I didn't hit on Monday (yoga doesn't burn as many calories I need, but it's only shy by about 100 calories...easily made up!).
Wednesday - Short day at work #3. I'll need to take a walking lunch this day. I don't think I'll have time after work to get to the gym, so I need to take advantage of the blessings of outdoor exercise. I'm thankful to have a job that allows me to eat at my desk and then use my entire break for exercise purposes. It's possible I'll be driving up to my mom's house after work and spending the night there. Make the turkey trot decision.
Thursday - Thanksgiving Day! There's a turkey trot in my mom's town this morning, so I'm seriously considering doing it. It starts at 9am. My mom mentioned it to me last month, but I doubt she'll be up to it, but that doesn't mean I can't do it on my own. Race or not, I'm getting some mileage in this day. My mom's walking route is lovely, so even if I just walk the loop a few times, I'll feel pleased with myself and okay to gobble a few of my favorites at lunch. Other than that, I plan on spending some glorious time with my family, loving my aunts, rejoicing in the traditions of our family, and just being the person I've become in front of all of them - changes they've already begun noticing and seem to enjoy.
Friday - BLACK FRIDAY! *lol* We'll get our plan of action together and get some holiday shopping done. It'd be best to do this in my mom's area where all the stores are, but we'll make that decision as a family where to hit the stores this year. I plan on doing some walking, running, and punching people out who try to take my stuff! *lol* Just playin' on the last one...unless it's a really great deal! ;) The gym will be open again, so if I need it, I'll go stress relieve there.
Saturday - Another SIBCCT, me thinks. It was a great joy to me yesterday as I was actually able to run 3 laps back to back. Usually 2 is my limit, and it makes me hurt. I'm working toward 4, then 5, and on from there.
I'm dubbing this week - BTTW Week. Balls to the Wall, baby! I'm making this week count! I won't kill myself over my goals, but when going, I'll push a tiny bit and make it count. I'll give myself one challenge a day, whether food, exercise, water, or mood related. I'll be conscious of every move and every action and be thankful for having another week to right whatever "wrongs" my mind may have tallied up for me this week.
Other things of interest:
First of all, a request to my Sparkies. I'm going to D.C. on the 5th of December for a week-long training. What I need from you is the following:
1) A song for my workout playlist that will let me use you for my fire while I'm gone.
2) A walking direction, route, or place of interest to visit. I have a half-brained scheme to let you all take me on a tour of the city by challenging me to walk to places and experience the enjoyment that travel + fitness holds! (May have more on this later...I have a thought but it's not fully formed, but you can still direct me to the sites using walking routes and mileage and such...)
Second, a thought. You see, I've been invited to Vegas for my birthday this year by a close friend. The first thing I checked about the hotel was whether it has a gym (it does), and the second thing was whether there were any races around that time. Well, there is. On my birthday. The Running from an Angel Marathon, Half, 10k, 5k and 50 miler is running in Boulder City, NV. I keep thinking that it would be great to start my 30's with a race in a foreign city, but working out the logistics in my head has been....stressful. How do I get there? Will my friend mind? Is it a crazy thought? I don't have to decide yet...I haven't even bought my ticket for the plane ride yet. (I'm a little nervous if I start a new job they won't let me go...) But I'm still thinking on it and considering it seriously.
Finally, some exciting news, at least in my eyes. A couple months ago I got a little crazy at the consignment shop. I bought a pair of 26s and a pair of 24s without even trying them on (because, well, they didn't fit yet). The 26s I could get on and buttoned, but could not zip, or breathe, or walk comfortably in. They now fit me and I wore them to work a couple weeks ago. (Yay for black jeans!!) But, as you know, the 24s were taunting me. To me, these jeans look SO small. I don't remember the last time I wore size 24s, but it was certainly back in HS at some point. When I bought them I could get them on my legs, barely...that was it. I have a picture and it's sad. Well, last night I put them on...all the way on. It was a struggle, for sure, but up they went. And then I took a backwards dive onto the bed and hurried to button and zip them. Talk about non-public jeans! *lol* They certainly don't "fit" yet, but my original goal was to wear them Christmas day (although I had a secret goal to have them fit by Thanksgiving). I count this as a win in my book! They will go on, button and zip - all by Thanksgiving! Now the real test is to see if I can drop the weight needed to wear them Christmas Day. Either way, they don't scare me anymore... And thanks to another wonderful Sparkie, when I finally get these jeans on (and maybe take them to wear on my Birthday in Vegas!!), I'll have a pair of size 22's to put in their place on the back of my door, the place reserved for goal clothes. I'm taking this accomplishment, especially considering the week I had!
What are your plans for Turkey Week? Wherever you're from, wherever you will be, be thankful for what you have, for the wonderful strides you are making for yourself, and hold your chin up with pride and determination.