Guess what? You are NORMAL! We all have our bad days. Tomorrow you will do better. Think PROGRESS, not PERFECTION! I wrote my blog today on "Progress" if you want to check it out. NOW, however, I need to MAKE some progress! HUGS and God Bless. 3346 days ago
If you had a friend that came yo you and said that they ate the wrong things that morning, would you call them a failure? Treat yourself as you would a friend. You had a setback, and we all do. It's okay. It may even happen again - just try to keep going in the right direction, and eventually you'll have fewer setbacks. If you've already lost 25lbs, then you're already going in the right direction! 3346 days ago
Hey girlfriend, All I can say after the other posts is: DITTO! And I'm so impressed that you have lost 25 lbs cuz I haven't lost anything yet. AND how brave of you to share your mistakes and your emotions with us so that we can 1) learn along with you and 2) get a chance to give you the support you need and deserve! Some of us have such a hard time posting our info or weight or pics, and YOU were brave enough to do a video with your real self and feelings!
I wonder if sometimes you feel you are responsible for others' choices and actions? I struggle with that, which comes from a place of caring but when I really think about it, the other person is the only one who can make his own choices, not me. I try to remember to turn that caring and wanting to help back to myself, cuz that's mainly the only person I can do choices and actions for.
For instance, you can do what you can to support husband's blood sugar, but don't think that because he got upset during a BS spike that it is becuz you didn't do something right. Just do what you did and try to help with the medical issue. Okay, so much easier said than done, right?
Well, we all do the best we can and sometimes we do well, sometimes okay, and sometimes we definitely could have made better choices. Let it go and move on. What else can you do? Probably not much.
Now. I hope that you have been able to tell yourself the same supportive things we are saying to you and the same supportive and encouraging things that you probably say to others. I hope that you are feeling at least a little bit better by now. And I hope that you will approach your next choices remembering that you are obviously a successful, brave, and caring person. You sound like a great person. Glad I watched your video and I wish you more success in the future! 3347 days ago
You did not fail. You simply slipped up and it happens to all of us. What counts is how you pick yourself right back up,and get back on track. Thats where you will find real success. Like you say its a journey, its not a diet, its not a quick fix, we all tumble every once in a while its what makes us human and anyone who tells you they don't is outright lying. Strive to do better tomorrow and the next day and the day after that, in a few days you wont even remember the binge. It happens to all of us and on a grand scale its ok. Its not giving up and continueing to perservere that is going to make you a winner. 3348 days ago
YOU DID NOT FAIL! You had a bad day, that's all! We all have bad days.
I feel for you, because you had a rotten time of it, but half the battle is recognising the triggers that set you eating what you shouldn't. You have WON THAT BATTLE, and twice in two months is pretty damn good in my view, because that means that for the other 58 days you did great!
Personally, I admire the heck out of you. Tomorrow is another day.
I am forever quoting Robbie Williams, and I am going to do it again:
"The morning brings a mystery, he evening makes it history."
That day is gone, and you learned something. Any day we learn something is a GOOD day!
Look forward to tomorrow's mystery. Hugs, Lex xxx
P.S. I'd like to friend you, if that's OK. 3348 days ago
You really had a VERY stressful day. I am confused, though, I kept hearing you say "I failed" on your vlog and then I see right beside your vlog title "I lost 25 lbs with sparkpeople." ?????? Sounds like a big SUCCESS to me! Today is a new day!!! Just because other people in your life choose not to take care of themselves, don't let it stop you on your journey! And you've only done this twice in 2 months?? That is not bad at all, and doubtful that it is unusual. Have a much better weekend, ok ? 3348 days ago
I first want to say that I am sorry you had a rough day. Now I want to give you some advice... You DID NOT FAIL! Failing is not recognizing where you went wrong, not taking responsibility for your actions, and not picking yourself up, dusting yourself off, and starting again. It sounds like you are NOT doing any of those things, therefore, you are not a failure.
I want to share something with you:
"The sisters Regret and Guilt look alike but they are very different. When regret makes a mistake she cries, "Oh, I wish I hadn't done that!" or "Why did I do that?" or "I'm never doing that again."
But when Guilt makes a mistake she yells, "You idiot, you blew it again!" or "You are such a loser - what's the matter with you?" or "You might as well give up; you're never going to get it right."
Regret makes mistakes all the time. She figures that everyone does, especially when they're learning something new. She even laughs at herself and shares her mistakes with other so they'll learn too. She never gives up trying.
Guilt makes mistakes too, but she blames herself because she believes she know better. Instead of helping her learn, her mistakes just prove that she is a bad person and that something is wrong with her. So with every mistake she resolves to do things PERFECTLY the next time to prove to everyone else she is good enough.
Both sisters decided to make changes. Regret started with small changes. She decided she would start paying more attention to her hunger and fullness ques.
After a few weeks of being on program, a stressful day happened and Regret went into the break room at work and ate a piece of a co-worker's farewell cake. Back at her desk, still feeling overwhelmed and stressed, she went back into the break room and had a second piece of cake. Within an hour she noticed she felt a little sick and tired, but STILL stressed out. Regret regretted she had the second piece of cake - but not the first! She decided that the next time she felt stressed, she would take a short walk instead of going back for more.
Guilt liked the idea of using hunger and fullness too - but she had failed on so many diets that she doubted she would do any better with this approach. She told herself that this was her last chance to get it right. Every time she ate she made sure she was hungry first. She felt great because she was doing it "perfectly". After a week of eating only when she was hungry, disaster struck. Guilt had eaten most of her lunch at her desk when her boss showed up with a cake to celebrate Secretary's Day. She had a piece, even though she wasn't hungry. Within a few minutes, she was berating herself for this. She gave up and went back for a second piece. She felt so bad about herself that she picked up a pizza and ice cream on the way home. After all, she couldn't even get this right, so what was the point?
Guilt's intentions were good but her unrealistic expectations and the shame and blame she heaped on herself were preventing her from learning, improving, and forgiving herself when she made choices that didn't work out so well. ..."
This was part of an article I read once and I have kept it with me for moments I make mistake and I fall into the guilt category verses the regret category.
The lesson is, regret allows us to have room for improvement. Guilt, keeps us locked where we are. Do not feel guilty that you made a mistake. It happens. Do not beat yourself up for being human. This is a LIFE style change, not a quick fix. You had a LIFE situation that will happen again at some point. This time, you reacted by eating - ask yourself what you can do next time this situation happens.
** Toddlers fall down many times before becoming proficient at walking. They may cry, but they don't feel ashamed. Instead, they get up, make adjustments, and try again. When you make a mistake, don't miss the lesson.
Two wrongs don't make a right (you and your hubby)... tomorrow is another day... so don't feel bad everyone on SP understands and we go through so much but its all worth it at the end..:)..I will look for your next blog I want to see a big smile.. just keep going forward...Sally 3349 days ago
Girl you need to stop it RIGHT NOW!!! You did NOT fail. Failing means not getting back up after you fall. Look at today. You were going to have a minor surgery and you STILL got up and exercised for ONE hour. So what you put some bad food into your body, ever SECOND is a new second to make a SUCCESSFUL decision. And you realize what you did and are not still putting the food into your mouth. You got RIGHT back up! That is SUCCESS!!! Would you have got right back up before you started this? Like last May? Probably not. SUCESS!!!! thats how I see it! And trust me WE ALL FALL!! I've fallen ALOT the past few weeks but here I am still going and down another lb! You are doing wonderful, look at the 25 lbs you have already lost! WOOO HOOOO!!! 3349 days ago
First I would like to say that you did not fail. You got your workout in and you still held yourself accountable. That isn't failing...failing only happens when you give up for good. You don't sound like you're ready to give up.
I am terribly sorry that you were faced with such a situation and you were really brave to get your feelings out there. It took a great deal of courage to admit you slipped up and it takes even more to continue on. You are a very strong individual and you can still reach your goals.
The next time your husband stresses you out, just take a deep breath. Remind yourself that you are reaching your goals for you, not for him. That way you can avoid the self-sabotage.
I really hope things get better for you and I hope you are feeling better now. 3349 days ago
you did not fail... we are human...all of us... and we do human things.. sometimes we need to lose site of our goals to be successful in reaching them....
i think every time we slip into "human mode"... we tend to forget just what our real goals are.. we go for the "instant" and say "to hell with the long run"... at the end of that journey is guilt of course... because that is part of being human as well... isn't it?
i think the secret is to accept our short comings... know that sometimes we "slip"... and the important thing is to recenter on what is really important.. and our health? that is something worthwhile to improve...
you cannot make choices for your husband.. he has to pick what road he will travel.. he has to be responsible for his own "humaness"... just as you cannot "make" someone happy.. you cannot choose for them a life you would like them to live...
the only one you can take responsibility for is you... the only one you can truly choose for is you....
and you have chosen health... with a side of humanity.... try not to be so hard on yourself... you are a beautiful person for caring so much....
Hello, I feel sad that you are experiencing such a down time in your journey. How frustrating to find yourself reacting in old patterns when you are obviously working very hard at learning new strategies.
I applaud your courage in reaching out on your blog - (I haven't been able to bring myself to do that yet.). So good that your brother was able to encourage you.
Just wanted you to know that your message was heard and I'm wondering -- if you would like to keep me posted on how you are doing.
I wish you peace and all good, CJ 3349 days ago
Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.