Saturday, July 17, 2010
It is July 17, 2010 and I just joined SparkPeople for the second time. I am writing this because as I upload pics of my family I realized I don't hardly have any pics of me. That is because I hate or should I say LOATHE to have my pic taken and for obvious reasons. I hate the way I look!!! I am now morbidly obese. I hate those words too and I never thought when I was young that I would ever get to this place. It gets really lonely for me as a fat person. And it is noone's fault but my own. I shy away from public places because I worry about what people must think of me. I love to swim but haven't yet this year because I look so horrid in a swimsuit. I think I could easily become a recluse. I want to lead a fuller life and to do that I have got to get this weight off. I would be happier, healthier, more active with my family, more confident, and I will have pictures of myself for my grandkids to see when they are older. I would hate to think that there aren't hardly any pics for my kids to remember me by after I am gone. It would then seem like I was hardly even here, barely existing. I can't live with that depressing thought so I am going to fight like hell to get healthy and I hope I meet others like me with the same goals along the way. I am here and I am getting rid of all the excuses starting now!!