Stupid, Stupid Pants - W10.D6
Friday, July 02, 2010
I'm enjoying the wonderful benefits of this weight loss, don't get me wrong. But there is one thing I just cannot seem to do. Squeeze my hips/stomach into a size 28. This is driving me C-R-A-Z-Y! Since April 18th, I have lost nearly 40 pounds and more than 18 inches. I have lost 6.5 inches alone in my hips, and 3 from my waist. But still...these damn size 30 pants! What's worse? They don't exactly stay up.
Every day I slip myself into my pants, wishing I had a smaller size. Every day I walk around with "droopy drawers" in the back and front of my pants from the weight loss. Every day I find myself pulling them back up. They rest on my hips and I can pull them down (even my "skinny" size 30 jeans from this summer) without undoing them. And still...those stupid size 28s keep mocking me. This seems absolutely stupid to me right now. I *should* be in 28s by now...at least SOME 28s. But I haven't found ONE PAIR that will fit my fat butt yet.
I have a 22/24 tank from Lane Bryant that I bought just a few weeks ago. I could've probably stood to get an 18/20. Now the 22/24 is just too big on me. So my top half has gone down considerably. In stretchy fabrics I'm looking around a 20-22. In the non-stretchy kind I'm down to a 26. I bought a size 28 blazer ...a BLAZER, mind you. This goes over another shirt...and I fit in the 28. I could even button the size 26, though it was a little too snug. Still...size 30 pants.
I know I shouldn't fret. I know, I know...I'm doing great so far and this NSV will come, eventually. But I can't help but be frustrated. I do know this is my body's natural nature. All through HS I work a size 22/24 pants with a size 18 top...or something like that. My top half is naturally smaller than my bottom half because I carry all my weight down there in huge thighs, big hips, and a very large stomach. Still, I can't help but be frustrated right now. "Maybe this month" I think...every month. Until then, I guess I'll keep pulling this stupid, stupid size 30 pants up.
Going to hit a few stores to look for that elusive black blazer today. Maybe I'll try another pair of size 28s...but I don't want to get upset again when they don't fit. *sigh*
All this being said...found a cute size 3x top (non-stretchy fabric and a cinched empire waist) yesterday at the 14 and up consignment shop yesterday. Also found a great find - a pair of size 11 shoes, black...modest heel...they fit and I'm thinking they might just be my NY shoes! WOOT! (I *never* find shoes there). 12 bucks each for both items...and the shirt still has a tag on it, so whoever bought it never wore it.
I'll take pics of the outfit choices soon and post them for all of you. Still not sure about this gray blazer...but who knows. Maybe it looks really nice. I'm just a very matchy-matchy kind of girl when it comes to suits. *shrug* Still looking for that perfect black blazer to go with my (growl) size 30 dress pants.
Tons to do this weekend to get ready for next Thursday:
* Find the perfect blazer
* Get my portfolio together
* Find the perfect, professional black bag
* Print off a copy of my resume
* Print out a list of references
* Prep myself (read: study) on the company and the people I'm interviewing with
* Prep some interview question answers
* Print out directions to myself from 5th avenue to JFK
Repeat after me: "You can do this. You can DO this!"