the here and now of body acceptance
Tuesday, June 08, 2010
Ok, here's the deal with my body. It's completely average. Average in everyway. And you know what? Average isn't good enough.
I don't seek to be average in any other arena of my life, so why should I say average is good enough when it comes to something I have most control over. I can't control genetic or hereditary illness that may come my way, I can't control how I am going to age and adapt, but I can control it up to a point. I can control what I eat and how much and how I exercise and how often. I completely affirm that you only get one body...this is it, so take care of it. I don't do anything to really damage my body, but I also should be giving it more.
I joined the YMCA this month and plan on renewing membership in CA. I'm really enjoying the group fitness classes. You can't quit, instructors are there to encourage you forward, and you push yourself for a solid, committed time. I want to be healthy, I do not want to drop alot of weight, I just want to feel toned, muscular, and able.
I love food. I love good food. I love all kinds of food. I believe that yeah, you only get one body, but you also only get one life, and to have been blessed with such a life filled with variety, nutrients, and accessibility is a rare, rare thing. Really, I don't eat alot of junk food, but I can't justify lean cuisine when I can do so much more for myself, the environment, and the economy when it comes to my consumption. I have a sweet tooth. And I have portion control problems. That's all I feel I really need to work on concerning my diet.
So here's the problem. I still can't find that happy place of body acceptance. And maybe firmness will help. Maybe continuing to consciously make healthy food choices will help. Maybe priding myself on the benefits of cardio exercise will help. But there's something about getting on the scale that seems like the final puzzle piece. Last summer I was feeling GREAT! and thought I looked great too, but when it was time to get on the scale I was horrified.
My hope is that being committed this summer to a three month fitness commitment (hopefully becoming a lifetime commitment!) will make this all even out. But in the mean time, how can I find body peace and acceptance of slow progress in the HERE AND NOW?!?