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Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Today I am feeling really calm inside. It feels good and I know it is a place that I have been before. Whenever I feel like I am in control of the food I put in my mouth and that I am getting a nice amount of exercise, this feeling of calmness comes over me.

So why do I choose to interrupt it sometimes with emotional baggage and stress? Wouldn't it be logical that if I am feeling this nice smooth feeling, I would want to maintain it?

In keeping with my desire to change things in my life, I noticed this week that because I have a ton of different kinds of fresh fruit around, and some good veggies, I have been eating better tasting and healthier meals. Another no brainer, right?

Then why do I throw away all of my hard work on junk food, sometimes?

And here is another good example of keeping my life in harmony. When my house is clean, my gardens maintained, I also feel this happiness inside. I can look out my windows and see my hard work in the beauty of the flowers and the green grass.

So why do I tend to let these things go and then all of a sudden spend hours and hours just to get them looking good again. Why can't I just work at this a little bit everyday and be happy all the time?

hmm, I am noticing a pattern here. It is the pattern of stop and go. do and don't do. flow and stagnation. Not to dwell on this idea of obsessive/compulsive nature - but maybe this has something to do with it? Maybe the obsessive/compulsive label is a bit harsh. I think it is more of an impulsive/ procrastination combination.

The baby steps idea is really beginning to take charge in my head. I love it. Small consistent steps.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I struggled with this statement below and still do struggle with it sometimes:

    "So why do I choose to interrupt it sometimes with emotional baggage and stress? Wouldn't it be logical that if I am feeling this nice smooth feeling, I would want to maintain it?"

    Babysteps is definitely key!

    Another suggestion would possible be to stop labelling yourself as this or that! I know it's necessary sometimes! But, once I realized that I myself was always trying to categorize myself, that I would almost habitually become what that 'category' said I should be! I suppose one could than understand why Capricorns are the way they are. Because we have read what it says we should be... thus without realizing it... becoming that!

    So... why not take the future in your hands... take control of the steering wheel and STOP labelling yourself and just be! Even if that means enjoying a piece of cheesecake or the whole damn thing! Enjoy it while it lasts knowing that you are going to do something healthy tomorrow... because tomorrow's a new day! NO... that does not mean throw your whole day away... I am a failure... I ate cheesecake! It means... if you actually allow yourself to eat it, without the guilt... the urge to eat the whole damn thing in one sitting may just simply progress to 3 or 4 days or just one piece and you let the dog eat the rest... lol! Who knows... who cares! Just enjoy the damn cake is all! It ain't a binge! It's one of life's pleasures!

    I need to do some serious rennovating of team System Reboot! Hopefully I find the time and energy soon! But yoiu might want to check out the following thread in the team:

    This team is NOT allowing...

    3795 days ago
  • KARBIE18
    Great insights! I don't think you are alone on this. I think it's natural to have these cycles. But becoming aware of them is big. Way to go!!


    .S. Love the pic!
    3797 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/9/2010 9:30:32 AM
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