A Different Kind of Weekend
Monday, June 07, 2010
Well, I am pleasantly surprised...I overate on Friday--went to a Mexican place with a friend--I knew I would exceed my calories for the day, but I did it by choice. I was somewhat concerned that I might be setting myself up for a weekend-long binge, but that didn't happen! And that is what I am celebrating! In the past, I would have told myself that since I "blew it" on Friday, I would re-start my healthy eating the next day or the next day.....or....and then consume hundreds (or thousands) of extra calories. This weekend was different. I didn't dwell on the fact that I ate more than my allotted calories on Friday; didn't "beat myself up" about it. I knew it was my choice. I also knew I had the choice to continue or get back on track. I was tempted.....but fortunately, realized that the only way to break the old patterns was to actually stop doing those old behaviors. I was back on track for Saturday and Sunday!
As a Christian, I am trying to remind myself that I need to stop abusing my body with food. If I want to honor God and all that He has done for me, then I need to "walk the walk" with my eating and exercise habits as well. What kind of testimony am I as an obese person? I am not saying obese people cannot be awesome testimonies for Christ, I am just saying this for me personally. For many years I used food to fill the "God-sized hole" in my heart. As this became a habit, I found myself using food for everything and I honestly ENJOY eating. But I let food take over and come between me and a healthy lifestyle. I have spent the past 24 years struggling with my weight and sitting on the sidelines. I really want to change this. It's not that I haven't wanted to change this before, but I am feeling a different type of commitment now. I have decided I am NOT going to be that person who binges on pizza, cookies, etc. any more. I am NOT going to buy into the negative messages from the enemy.
My direction now is: "Do what is right, even when I don't feel like it" I have had a lot of messages about this lately and I know that when I get a message more than once or twice, it's the Holy Spirit giving me instruction. And I know how He blesses me when I am obedient!
For example: I attended a graduation open house yesterday---lots of my favorites--lemon bars, peanutbutter sheetcake, meatballs, cheese--I could go on and on....and while I wasn't really hungry, in the past I would have eaten all of this and more just because it was there. BUT YESTERDAY, I DID WHAT WAS RIGHT EVEN THOUGH I DIDN'T "FEEL" LIKE IT--I didn't eat at all. I had a diet coke and socialized with friends while they all ate. And I enjoyed the open house just much as I would have if I had eaten but without the remorse. Later, when I was hungry, I opted to eat something healthier at home instead of stopping for fast food on my way home from church. I am choosing to celebrate these victories. I do not feel like I am depriving myself; I am rewarding myself by celebrating these changes and better choices and giving thanks to God.
Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior; He is my strength and He WILL help me and lead me through this journey to weight loss and health!! I am so grateful.