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Maybe I should have known...

Saturday, May 15, 2010

It never seems to fail. When I have a good/great day, I usually end up having a terrible day the next several days to make up for the good/great day I had. If this is negativity, then I guess I need more help.

I woke up this morning after a wonderful 8 hours of sleep to find my daughter angry at me about something and she didn't change her attitude for over 3 hours. She is only 9 and has not learned yet to let go of a grudge. I felt miserable all day because of the anger feelings we both ended up having this morning.

I had a spa party to introduce a particular skin care line to my friends and only one showed up. That caused a disappointment that added to the miserable feeling.

Then, my job caught up to me. I had to work for an hour today. That is not what bothered me. The problem is....my daughter is mature enough to leave alone for an hour or two, but I guess from what she told me tonight, she was angry this morning because my job is causing me to leave her alone more often than what she finds acceptable. I just don't know what to do. I can't afford daycare; my bank sent me an overdraft statement today for a charge that looks like it was double charged and the bank was closed when I got the mail so I couldn't find out what was going on there. The neighbors are very understanding, but they don't want to raise my daughter for me. I can't blame them. I wouldn't want to raise their kids for them either. My family is either working also, or too sick to care for an active 9 year old. And my friends are busy with their lives. I don't know what to do. I work for a company that deals with confidentiality issues and I can't take her with me, but I don't want her thinking I care more for my job than I do for her.

OMG!! I just read this whine page!! I am so sorry, but I gotta tell ya. When my one friend showed up for the spa party, I told her the same thing.

I FEEL LIKE GIVING UP AND LETTING LIFE GET ME DOWN AGAIN. I AM FED UP WITH TRYING AND ONLY GETTING SO FAR BEFORE I AM PUSHED BACK DOWN. I AM TIRED OF BEING THE WET BLANKET WHEN MY DAUGHTER WANTS TO GO SKATING. "WE CAN'T AFFORD IT" "WE HAVE NO MONEY"

I FEEL LIKE MY LIFE ISN'T GOING TO GET BETTER. AND I WONDER IF THERE IS ANY HOPE.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • MOCHWR
    No words of wisdom. Take a deep breath and decide which issue is most important. Tackle that first and move on to the next. Maybe it's your daughter, talk to her and maybe set a time when she has your undivided attention. Maybe it's the bank so you don't get more charges. Whatever it is you will choose the right thing for you. You are strong and capable! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3708 days ago
  • REEKIE29
    I just to apply this philosophy and it usually helps keep things in perspective - if we didn't have these bad days/disappointments, we wouldn't be able to recognize the great days/blessings nor would we be able to appreciate them so much!

    Good advice from the previous posters - hang in there and don't try to tackle everything at once. Just like we have to take smaller bites and chew on them longer...apply the same practice to the other aspects of your life. Most importantly, don't beat yourself up. We have all been there and felt like we were the only ones going through it. Truth is...you're never alone and there are others who have been there and want to see You succeed.

    Use your experience to teach your daughter to deal with adversity too. You will be adding to her solid foundation and giving her skills to be successful in life too!

    Don't give up, girlfriend - hang in there and dig in your heels! Your next great day is straight ahead emoticon
    3708 days ago
  • SUGARBABY60
    You just sound overwhelmed. everything can be done in bite size pieces. don;t look at the whole picture just take baby steps

    . talk to your daughter she is old enough to make some decisions. Like , Do you want mom here with you all the time? If so then we will not ever be able to afford to have some of the extras. Now YOU make the choice. IF you watch yourself for a couple hours then we can afford some extras. If not we get NO EXTRAS AT ALL ! the choice is up to you .

    LIFE is tough there is no getting around that. If you give up you are saying it is ok to put on all the extra weight it will take to die and leave that precious 9 yr old girl alone forever.Now what choice will YOU make? Be a winner and LIVE or make the other decision.May you choose a long healthy life.We Spark friends are here to walk with you on this journey ......if that is what YOU choose.
    3708 days ago
  • LEXIEJ
    I just want to give you a hug and tell you that even though things seem grim; there is a light on the other side you just have to be strong and patient. But don't give up because there is hope for you and your family

    emoticon emoticon
    3708 days ago
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