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Tuesday, May 04, 2010

I know many of you have probably heard of Uni-Boob, when instead of having 2 great looking sisters where they should be, you have one giant one across your chest. Sports Bras and famous for creating this not-so-attractive look.

Well, this weekend I went shopping. I needed new bottoms- Pants, Work Skirts, and Panties
(Yes, my panties are too big). So I was going strong. I was feeling great. EVERY size 8 that I was pulling was fitting great. Some were even loose. So- I eyed a pair of Size 6 pants hanging on a clearance rack. Should I do it? Hmmmmm. Will I be disappointed? Will I be pleasantly Surprised? GO FOR IT!!!

I grabbed them off the rack and ran to the dressing room. I put one leg in, the the other and slid them up- Wow they are actually going to go over my thighs, they actually slid over my still very ample hips. I get them all the way pulled up and look at myself, now I am sweating-

I go for it. It is a bit of a struggle. The button is easy, but the zipper is a bit strained. I tug, I sweat, I fight, and finally- THEY ARE ON!! For the first time since I was about 19 I actually have on a size 6. They may not look great, but they are on.

Then I turn around to check out the bottom. EWWWW!! What is THAT. Where are my newly firmed butt cheeks?!?!?!? In the place of the cute bottom that I have been working so hard on (Thank you Kim Kardashian for making a big butt "In") is one giant uni-butt. Gone are the 2, nicely defined and recently renovated butt cheeks that I had, and in their place is one giant lump of mass, squeezed together and gasping for air. I look like an alien right now, then I realize what it is- I LOOK LIKE THE MOM OFF OF CONEHEADS! SERIOUSLY!!

Then i think back to all of the times that my pants were too small for me. Is this what my butt looked like? Have I been a persistant offender of sporting a uni-butt?!

Wow, not a good look. None-the-less, I got the darn size 6 on, it is within my grasp. A 6 is my goal size, and the fact I got it over my "birthing hips" (Yes someone actually told me I had good birthing hips once) Is an accomplishment in it's own right.

But I also taught myself a lesson- Be happy with the size you are in and wear things that FIT- Who wants to walk around looking like a Conehead with a Uni- Butt!

Happy Tuesday

JoAnna emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    "Someone told you have good birthing hips?!" Who says that?!!

    Anyway, girl congrats on the size 6 - how amazing is that?! That is truly exciting in every way.

    Sorry about that uni-butt - LOL. Uni-butt - that's too funny.

    3622 days ago
    Lmao! That was great! And uni-butts fall right into the don't category with muffin tops! Awesome you almost fit into your goal, even though you were sweating profusely and couldn't breath, but I mean all in all that's awesome, keep up the good work!
    3624 days ago
    This is too funny! I always ask myself who am I offending when I get dressed?! LOL I think by you putting on the size 6 that it gave it the appearance of the unibutt. I would say find the right pair of jeans that fit you & give your bum that lift you so desire to see looking back in that mirror. lol

    God bless & you are too funny!

    3625 days ago
    Oh hunnie, I know this feeling! You will fit in those 6's before you know it! Keep up the awesome work!!!

    emoticon emoticon
    3626 days ago
  • no profile photo CD6465553
    LOL! Funny! You'll be looking GREAT in those size 6's very soon. No worries. I have a big butt too & gosh I don't ever wanna have a Uni-Butt either. Hehe!
    3626 days ago
    Too funny! But oh, so true! Thanks for sharing....I think that sometimes too many women (and some men!) are more caught up on the size than the fit and look....Besides, when it looks good on the outside, everyone can see it - nobody can see the 1 inch tag on the inside with the pea-sized number written on it! emoticon
    3626 days ago
  • SUGIRL06
    LoL! I had the same experience recently. Buy a pair that fit. Not a pair that just zip. Haha! Those 6s will look perfect soon enough!
    3626 days ago
    Thanks for the smile and it hit!

    I have a flat butt and it's not going anywhere but I feel your pain. I love it!

    I think it's a difficult thing for a woman to choose a larger size for a better fit, but I know I am getting too old for the hip hugger jeans no matter that I am loosing the muffin top or not.

    You go girl!
    3626 days ago
    Those size 6's will be yours before you know it...and with only one butt to put in them lol
    3626 days ago
  • MCB3TH
    OMG! That's so funny - and so so true! I can't tell you how many times I see folks walking around in things that REALLY do not fit! I hope you got those jeans just to hang out for encouragement! Keep going and you will see two firm cheeks in them!
    3626 days ago
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