Wednesday, April 14, 2010
We are going to do this one a little early. Okay so yet another stressed out week. Trying to work out everyday is hard work and eating right. BUSY this week with events for the town I live in. It is week of the young child. So there is all sorts of activities for kids the ages that I have. So today was so up and down. First the hub tells me he has to work 11am-9pm and I don't have a sitter for the kids so I said I will take them with me. Then I waited till the last minute to tell them of course. AND then I tell them and my hub calls and says he is getting out at 5pm. So he can watch the kids but I already told them they are going with me. SO now we all went. We had fun doing crafts at all the tables, meeting up with there friends seeing mother nature.....YEAH that is right I said mother nature. LOL They had the kids put on fair wings, flower crowns and leaves and do a parade thing. Then came back and made cookies with magic. They were really excited!!! Then we all went out for ice cream. I had frozen yogurt YUM!!!! It was a good day after having a bad day with daycare kids. STRESSFUL with the hub.
The other thing I did today was I called a therapist. I am having troubles in the marriage as you have read in other blogs of mine. I just hate that there isn't a balance or work. It gets to the point where I don't want to do anything because I have been doing EVErYTHING for so long. I need help in so many areas I needed to start somewhere right?? So I figured if I started with that then it could relieve some stress. I am hoping or just very wishful!!! I am waiting for her to call me back to set something up. I was really excited that I took that step. I really want to know why I am fat it has been bugging me for some time now and I can't figure it out. I want to be skinny or thinner so bad it makes me sad that I can't get there. Right now I am beyond stuck. So I am hoping this will work. I have been watching RUBY and taking notes. Somethings tell me that maybe it is my father. He never accepted me as his daughter and I don't care but maybe deep down I really do?? I have had a step father since I was 2 but he isn't my biological father. All these years I have been telling myself I don't care but maybe I do?? WHo knows. The other thing is the hub I want him to do more around the house and help out more with the kids. I hate that he comes home from work yelling at them for no reason. SCREAMING after being home for 5 minutes. Drives me crazy. Some times he ruins a really good day because of it. SO I am hoping to fix it and fix that part in hopes it will fix the other parts.
The other big break through this week is I out ran my 4 years olds. One doesn't like to run she is easy but the other one used to just run and I could never keep up with him. NOW I CAN!!!! I am super excited knowing that all these work outs are doing something. Now I will have to run against their friend who is super fast. That will be tomorrows test!!! I will fill you in then. Okay I am hoping to have a better half of the week and get in all my workouts. Too many activities going on this week to get to the gym but at least I am working out at home. Eating not going too good. A little high on calories and not enough protein. Struggling with it. But I will get there hopefully by the end of the week. Take care!!!