Week 5

Okay so this week I was stressed out. Two reasons. I have new baby coming next week and trying to get the baby I have onto a schedule that fits in with my kids. That way when the new baby comes I can get her on our schedule as well. But it is easier to do one kid at a time. The baby I currently have is getting teeth in so she has more silva in her mouth and she is throwing up more. Wednesday was a great day with the kids went outside no issues. Even the babies mom came early to get her. Thursday different story she throw up all over me. Had to give her a bath in the sink and Friday she did it again but not as bad. BUT on the good note she slept better for me. usually she sleeps for 20 minutes and that is all. So I will take hour naps twice a day anytime. The other kid I have just returned from having a week off. By the end of the week he was pretty bad. Trying to get him back into a routine was hard. He didn't want to sleep or behave. SO all in all a rough week. I caved this week and now I feel like I am on a downward spiral. I had chocolate on thursday cuz things were so bad. Just a handful of M&M's. Not too bad then on Friday I had more M&M's and some dove chocolates. I dunno how to stop now. I feel over come by chocolate. By Saturday when I went to work where I am surrounded by chocolate I still wanted some but resisted and came home and had some. I need to stop!!! I want this weight off more than anything. So why am I sabotaging it?? I went to the gym on Friday and I felt like killing myself and let me tell you I am hurting today. It is only Saturday and I am hurting wait til tomorrow I will really be hurting. I did 45 minutes of weights and 30 minutes on the bike. I just feel like I am not going to lose this weight and be stuck. I really want to be as close to 200 as I can for the reunion. I dunno what else to do............I know one thing NO MORE CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!! We will start there.

Jenn