What is really going on here?

This weight has got to go! I weighed in today for the first time since January 09. Last year I vowed never to weigh in again until I was ready and even though I wasn't ready this morning my spirit said DO IT! So I grudgingly complied.

The last time I weighed in I used the scale at the gym so who knows if this one is accurate but for now I'm going with the reading. I contemplated throwing it out and buying a new one but instead I dusted it off and jumped on. Needless to say I was not pleased. Yes, I'd lost but where I thought I was compared to what that miserable scale said was different. The scale as never been my friend as most of you know and it didn't speak nicely to me today. But you know, that's okay because I am determined to make friends with this dreadful inadequate piece of metal and plastic!

To start with I have decided to give my scale a name to start this friendship on a positive note. I'm thinking Simpleton or perhaps Lucy. Any suggestions?
I'm leaning toward Lucy. In any case, I will start this trip with or without her cooperation as I am determined to see the results I want and need for my own peace of mind.

Although Lucy did get on my nerves this morning she gave me just exactly what I needed - a powerful blow to jump start my determination to put my running shoes back on and head out for a run later today. I realize this means diving head first back into the gray zone of never knowing how much exercise is just right to balance the caloric intake but I have to start somewhere. So bring on the confusion and circus act because I'm going to whip this body into gear.

I accepted a long time ago that my body has a mind of its own and no matter what, I lose slower than anyone I know. I mean who else do you know that had to triple her food intake in order to lose weight? That's what I've been doing this last year with Spark increasing my calories to lose weight. It has been a real challenge. I have lost weight but progress has been extremely slow. I'm hoping now that my calories are high enough I will be able to lose weight faster with adding the exercise back in. Before the 2-4 hours a day at the gym just wasn't cutting the weight because I didn't eat enough.

So in a couple weeks I will start year 2 with Spark. The changes that are going on in my life will not only motivate me but also allow me to become more focused on Trish. Believe me when I say its time! So wish me luck! I must close now and find my running shoes!
Much love to SP!
Trish