THE END OF JANUARY ALREADY???
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Where oh, where did the time go? I am sitting here at my desk, just wondering how I actually spent all of these days in January.
I did make some attempts at getting things right but some of these days did not go so well. Most of the time, I found myself in an emotional fog. It seems that my best intentions were upset by the cruelty of others. The main let down was simply me! I got in my own way by going back to a place that I don't belong in, that I will never belong in...and I feel so very foolish about it. I have clearly chosen to punish myself on some of these days in January by eating too much or by making poor choices.
So, now, the present is what matters. The present is always what matters, for that matter! Some major changes are coming my way in February. Changes are good for the most part because they help us grow. Changes can also be a little frightening. I have to constantly remind myself that my God is not a God of fear but a God who keeps His promises and will NEVER abandon me or forsake me.
The very same individuals who let me down just 6 or so months ago have done it again. How did this happen??! Well, the way I see it is that I did not learn my lesson well enough the first time. The unbelievable blessing in all of this is that one huge issue got resolved and my youngest son has been set free from the torment he has been living with. I have gotten to see that torture face to face and alas! I can say that there is a purpose to every trial. Every spiritual test becomes a part of our testimony.
So, as this month quickly comes to an end, I look forward to February! I shall expand on what I have learned this month and continue on the right path. I did somehow manage to lose 5 or 6 pounds in January despite my battle with myself and some of the down falls. "My mistakes and yours do not define us now! They tell us who we are NOT"