My River Runs Deep, Sometimes
Friday, October 16, 2009
I have been thinking. Sometimes life is good and sometimes it is bad. It can be just a rollercoaster of events or you can have a nice smooth train ride and not a worry in the world. I know I am one of those who has the rollercoaster life and, although sometimes I despise it, I enjoy most of the peaks and dips that are thrown my way. They all make me a stronger and better person for their ups and downs. Like I lost my maternal grandfather back in 1993 and my maternal grandmother last year and those were definitely harsh dips. But there are always those nice highs, like in 2006 when my daughter was born. I have started thinking and trying to be healthier and joined this site to assist me with that goal. I am looking, that within the next year, to be in a better situation, healthwise, than I am right now. I want to be able to run around with my daughter and not feel like I am ready to collapse. I want to be able to go hiking when I am in upstate NY visiting my Fiancee's family and not feel like I cannot breathe and my chest is going to implode. I would like to be able to shop in Walmart and Kmart for clothing, not just in Lane Bryant, because I can fit into them. I am not necessarily looking to loose pounds as much as inches around my waist, thighs and hips. There will be highs, like dropping a pant size, and there will be lows, like being tired and depressed and not feeling like doing anything except eating the metaphorical hurts away, but I will try to be strong and work through all of those dips and peaks and make my final goal of being healthier and happier and able to watch my daughter, and any other children I may have in the future, grow up, go through school and college, get married and play with my grandkids when the time comes.
I just need to remember:
I will stay strong! I can hold on! I will survive!