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Those you love just don't understand

Sunday, October 04, 2009

Okay so Saturday I planned on working til 3pm and then going to my neice's 2nd birthday party. Well I had a late lunch, at 215pm, then went to the party. I had lost of good healthy lunch so I was prepared at the party. I knew they were going to have pizza. I THOUGHT they were going to have the pizza about 4ish and I knew I would still be full from lunch. Well I get there and there is nothing going on. There is just people standing around talking. No one offered me anything to drink. So I went to the kids room and played with my neice for a few until she got preoccupied and went and played in the playroom with all the other kids. Fine so I went to talk with my mom and brother. Still nothing going on as far as a party. About hour and half of waiting around FINALLY my brother says he has ordered the pizzas. So we opened my neice's presents. That took a whole 10 mintues. There wasn't too many people there and not a whole lot of presents. She didn't mind my mom gave the best gift. Talking puppets. All the kids loved them. So now the kids are going crazy and back down stairs they went to play. About 45 mintues later the pizza arrives. Now it has been 2 hours since I have been there and I arrived late because I had to work. I am starving at this point. She had no snacks put out for anyone, somone had asked and she took out a half eaten bag of pretzels and popped some popcorn in the microwave. I think she forgot about it. Well my whole plan was out the window and I only wanted 2 pieces of pizza and no cake. I ended up eating 4 pieces of pizza and a small piece of cake. I couldn't help my self I had to more plan. I was really hungry and didn't know what to do so I panicked. I guess from now on I should ask my sister in law about what we are eating and if there will be anything healthy there and if not maybe I can bring something. I counldn't this time because I was working all day but maybe next time. I have to start thinking of these things better I guess. My brother kept making the comment that he isn't on a diet and why should there be diet food in the house and blah blah blah. I was mad at him for saying it because he was only thinking of himself. His wife is pregnant and doesn't care what she eats either. I am sorry but when I was pregant all I ate was fruits and veggies and lots of water but I am 10 years older then her too. I just hate how family doesn't care about me being on a diet and wants to either sabatoge me or see how strong my will power is. I went to my grandmothers last week and we had Mcdonalds. I got a salad and all they did was talk about how it doesn't fill you up and all this other negitive stuff. I will push through this and move on. I will have a better plan for the holidays since they are coming up quick. Boy how this year has flown by. It is already October and I have 3 months left. I need to get going on losing more weight. THanks for reading. Any other ideas would be great. Thanks in advance.

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BUSIBODI
OOOh Jenn, I totally feel your frustration with your sister-in-law. I'm kinda in a similar situation with my husband brother and his wife. Let's not go there! Anyway, what I do want to say is: the next time someone makes a snide comment about your "diet" you should calmly say "I'm not dieting, I'm choosing to live a healthier life and trying to take better care of myself." and walk away.

Don't waste your time and energy on their stupidity! Don't dwell on what you ate, you didn't have a lot of choices. And like you said, next time you will be more prepared. I truly believe you will be because you will remember this particular party and the annoyance alone will ensure that you are prepared!!

Love ya!
Anna
4217 days ago
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MAIZZY
I agree with the others. People can be so unfeeling sometimes. Just remember there are also plenty of understanding people out there too. Since I've been a vegetarian I've had many people make comments to me. I try to ignore it, but it does hurt my feelings. Something I do is always offer to bring something along - usually a salad of some kind. I bring a big bowl to share with everyone, but I know that I will be able to eat something while I'm there. Hope all these ideas help. Remember you are not alone.
4217 days ago
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LAFEMMEDELALUNE
Lots of good advice here!
I tend to go into panic mode when I am very hungry and there are no healthy options. I get so upset with myself, but the most important thing to do is get right back into the healthy lifestyle after the scary situation has passed....which you did! You are a trooper!

4217 days ago
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CD2702433
Sometimes family really isn't very easy. After being on my "lifestyle" change now for nine months and thirty pounds... my family is FINALLY understanding that it isn't a diet, and I will eat but not everything that is in front of me. My moms favorite saying to me is you NEED fat in your diet... as she is slathering the butter on my toast. Yes mom, I do need fat in my diet, but I get PLENTY.... thank you very much.
They may never get it but as long as you do, and go prepared... who cares what they say or do.
4217 days ago
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ALMOM68
Jenn, lots of good advice for you so far. I think that planning is key. It sounds like you had a good plan to not go to the party hungry, but then because they ate later than you expected, you were hungry and splurged a bit. Don't beat yourself up too much, just get back on track like you are doing. I agree with taking snacks with you in situations like that where you just never know how it's gonna go. Whatever granola bars, fiber bars, meal replacement bars you like, dried fruit like raisins & craisins, nuts, trail mix, etc. transport easily & are good to help tide you over. It sounds like your extended family just doesn't get it or want to get it, so I'd just plan to do what you need to do and quietly lead by example for them. Who knows? One day they might see all the progress that you have made and then when they ask you how you did it, you can share with them. I've found that you have to wait until people are ready to change, it has to come from them, you can't do it for them. I have found that often the best thing to do in those situations is to just quietly go about doing what you need to do for yourself and don't worry about what others think or do. (((Hugs))) Anne
4217 days ago
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BROWREN
I'm with Hippychick. I carry food with me wherever I go. Like her it is usually an apple, banana, or granola bars. The high fiber, high protein granola bars are great. They can stay in your purse forever, so the only think you have to do is remember to put another one in after you eat the one you have.
4217 days ago
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HIPPICHICK1
I always carry food with me wherever I go. I take things that travel well, like bananas, apples and granola bars. I have stopped speaking to ANYONE about my weight, what I choose to eat, etc., who isn't supportive of my weight loss program or who haven't asked about it.

Your family may or may not be sabotaging you. The thing to remember is that there are now statistically MORE people in the U.S. (67%) who are overweight than there are who are normal weight so it may SEEM like they are sabotaging you, but ultimately what is happening is that they've become lazy and uncaring about their own bodies due to the fact that so much food we eat is plain junk and it's just plain simple to eat garbage rather than cook a healthy meal or eat a piece of fruit (which is no trouble at all).

Good Luck and be strong!!
4217 days ago
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SKOUET
I am sorry to hear about how negative your family is about all that. It's really sad. Have you tried explaining to them what you have learned here on Spark? You're not just doing it for the weight loss, you want a HEALTHY body & life. I think you have the right attitude - asking what's for food so you can plan and bring your own stuff! Definitely the way to go! Keep strong! I am proud to read how far you've gone!
4218 days ago
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LORT-C
It is tough, but now you know you have to plan more and take things with you. Decide its a learning experience, put it behind you and go on. You can do this, you will do this and be a healthier you in the long run.
4218 days ago