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A Dreamer of Pictures I Run in the Night

Monday, April 27, 2009


Sure the nutrition tracker has helped me. I suspect it helps most people.

Way back, before Spark, before alli, before I buckled down and got into getting healthy, before, before, before, before, back when three quarters of a bag of potato chips would disappear and I wouldn't know where it went, before and back to when someone in college dared me to eat a whole large pizza and I did, and back to cleaning my plate and all of that, back, back, back, somewhere in there portions were lost.

And in their place came greed, and stuffing, and piling. Dinner wasn't dinner, it was excavating layer upon layer of fat-sugar-salt-carbs, over and over again. Sure, sometimes fat-sugar-salt-carbs was Mexican. Sometimes it was Greek. Or Italian. Or kosher style. Or Chinese. But it was always fat-sugar-salt-carbs.

Sanity had to return. The dinner plate had to stop looking like a strip mining operation in Morgantown, West Virginia. It had to turn back into pieces and care and choices and waiting.

Yes, waiting. I don't mean waitstaff, although that's a part of it. It's the feeling of not so instant gratification. Of anticipation. Of small delays, and how they improve the process.

And it was about experimenting with flavor, with things that didn't strictly fit into the old fat-sugar-salt-carbs mold. Things like fresh vegetables, and fruits, like dairy and proteins and spices. Yes, cinnamon!

Tracking all of that has a meaning that goes beyond calories or carbs or points. It is a diary of what you did, how you felt, how you took care of yourself. There is still excavating, yes. It is still an archaeological expedition. But it's not to the base of a seemingly bottomless mass of food. Rather, it is a trip through nutrition, all laid out for all time and all to see, a record of accomplishments and, yes, of slipups and poor choices sometimes. For they are a part of all of this.

It is a journey into the self.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Great writing as usual. I have recently found that tumeric, garlic and chili powder makes my morning eggs into something fabulous. But I change it up. With nothing, with garlic, chili powder only. All of them together. It helps push the hey, I have eaten button.

    4218 days ago
    What great post! I love reading about my bad habits in a fun and forgiving way. Thank you for taking the shame out of self neglect and sharing about your new found self respect.
    4228 days ago
    I enjoyed how poetic you were in this blog! :) and i like your background about being 'DONE' with being fat. *sigh* ! thanks for sharing the motivation
    4228 days ago
    I just LOVE your blogs!! Thanks for being wonderful!
    4229 days ago
    Thanks for putting that out there for us to see, relate to, and gain inspiration from. And, thanks for starting your blog entries with a song!
    4229 days ago
    Ah! You're my cinnamon girl!

    This was such a great, well-written, thoughtful blog post. Thank you for sharing it with all of us.
    4229 days ago
    Great Blog!!!

    The nutrition tracker has helped me in so many ways. I now know what a true portion of meat looks like, I can eyeball a half a cup of veggies, and I'm calculating everybody's lunch at work while they are eating...hahahah! emoticon
    4229 days ago
    Ah... this was one of those rare times when I had to check the song for lyrics. Dang! I couldn't name the tune, and I knew that one too!

    Your line about the strip mining operation just simply cracked me up!

    I confess that I am *still* learning about good foods, and some days I don't do so well. It's easier to grab a powerbar for lunch than concoct something healthy. But it's working for me for now, so I go with it. Some days are better than others, but it's all a learning experience!
    4229 days ago
  • no profile photo KCHIESA
    What an awesome blog! I totally feel you.
    4229 days ago
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